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30 M Seattle, WA

My Details

Last Online
Today – 11:57am
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Strictly anything
Atheism, and very serious about it
Graduated from masters program
Sales / Marketing
Less than $20,000
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids
Likes dogs and has cats
English (Fluently)

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My self-summary
My brain self-caffeinates after dark. I would do well as an owl or raccoon, but come noon I'd be the ambling gazelle fighting off a food coma as the hyenas close in. I relate to cats a lot, to further mix my animal analogies.

I sneeze gargantuan sneezes. I would make a terrific pig-evicting wolf and a terrible ninja.

Barking dogs and loud people startle me. I adjust more quickly to the former.

When I was a kid my universe revolved around Legos, Ghostbusters, Back to the Future, and Star Wars. I'm not sure what the connection between those things is, but I still think they're cool.

I wish I could stick around to see the whole future; looks like there'll be a lot of it, and I'm excited about it. The universe is so big!
What I’m doing with my life
Opened my private practice as a psychotherapist in Feb 2014. As of this writing I have zero clients, so I pay my bills peddling heating and A/C systems at Costco, or rather appointments for the sales thereof. Once I get my therapy peddling down I'll shrink exclusively.

On the non-income front I play tabletop games with friends in weekly meetups, read/watch/listen to things about sociology/science/economics. Hmm, that makes me sound like a pretentious bore; sample offerings: The Daily Show, xkcd What-If?, Planet Money, Guns Germs N' Steel. I am also a volunteer/indentured servant butler for a resident cat.
I’m really good at
Finding absurdity in everyday things. Relating to people rather than offering advice. My chocolate chip cookies are well-received.

I'm not so good at: parallel parking, multiplying very big numbers, and evading people walking in my direction.
The first things people usually notice about me
Hmm, I never ask... what do *you* notice about me?
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I love Calvin and Hobbes. I read it over and over as a kid, then went back and read the whole cartoon again a couple years ago and enjoyed it even more. The Far Side is demented genius.

I wish I could draw like Stephen Gammell.

I like tabletop games such as Apples to Apples, telephone pictionary, Dominion, and Betrayal at House on the Hill. I'm also into video games like Portal, Braid, Diablo III, and Shadow of the Colossus.

My friend forced me at gunpoint to read Infinite Jest a couple years ago, and I finished it a year later (it's surprising how long someone can hold you at gunpoint if they're really committed). I'm glad he made me; currently reading The Pale King sans lethal threat.

Arrested Development is hilarious. I love movies, especially ones that demand multiple viewings, like Primer and Memento.

Food-wise, I like Mexican, Indian, and Tillamook cheddar cheese.
The six things I could never do without
Good friends. Seems silly to make a list of six.

Oh, all right. I'm addicted to the internet. I like having places to go to reflect, like mountains and bodies of water. A well-placed joke is always welcome. Alternate perspectives are nice, too. I'll save the last one in case I need it someday.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How strange it is to be anything at all.
On a typical Friday night I am
Meeting up with friends. Or figuring out new drinking concoctions with my brother. Or looking up astronomical objects on Wikipedia. Sea creatures and ancient empires also interest me.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I have a recurring fear that I will be teleported to the bottom of the ocean. It's dark down there! And cold!
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 21–35
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
You like to swing on swings, especially after dark.

Sometimes you get an urge to press all of the elevator buttons, just to see what does happen.

You will talk with someone for an hour about random things and be amazed by all the time that has gone by.

It bugs you that space travel is prohibitively expensive for most of us.

You can make yourself laugh when you're alone.