Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Being from WV it's been a struggle to leave all of the incest
behind. I mean, it was a welcome escape. Yet I'm trying to grow as
a person and venture into the world of people that I'm not related
to...scary indeed. Shoes are cool, by the way. We had it all wrong
with that barefoot ridiculousness. I am actually a proud
Mountaineer and defy stereotypes that surround my home state. While
still having a sense of humor about it.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Came to TN for Grad School and just stuck around. Will definitely
be here for the next few years. After that I plan to pursue my
lifelong dream of becoming a fluffer for the porn industry.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Fluffing. See above. Or look up on Wikipedia. Also pretty sharp
when it comes to matters that require less manual dexterity.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My freakishly tall stature. I stand about 6 foot 7 inches. Kind of
hairy too. I pretty much just exude manliness. An endocrinoligist
once told me that I reek of testosterone. As it turns out, I was
actually dressed as a drag queen at the time.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Any adult film where I have contributed to the male erectness.
Aside from that, I really enjoyed the Stieg Larsson trilogy "The
Girl With/Who...". Managed a Mexican joint for a time and was
indoctrinated into the whole culture as a gringo. So Mexican is my
jam. Movies and shows are ever changing, as is the musical taste.
Although I always seem to come back to rock.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1.) Irish love for booze.
2.) Irish guilt for everything.
3.) Guilt for not actually being Irish-Catholic.
4.) Fam & Friends? Seems logical. Should that be higher?
5.) Is this a ranking system? Because it seems odd to say God now,
6.) A hearty cardiovascular/respiratory/nervous system agreement.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
The future, and what I can presently do to make it attainable. But
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Forced to submit an online profile because one of my friend's
wives/girlfriends has set me up with so many duds that they
themselves have recommended resorting to online trolling.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Really put it out there with that fluffing thing. Hard (hah...I
actually hate puns) to surmise anything that would be more self
deprecating than manually arousing the wind sock action of another
man's unit. Once again, I'm straight.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You have found the personal info as entertaining and nonsensical as
it was intended. After being strong-armed into creating a profile,
I sarcastically slapped it together to appease a friend. I'm sure
that if you've made it this far, then you're fighting the urge to
track me down immediately. I encourage you to do so. Not keep
fighting the urge, that is. But the latter. I'm assuming the
interest is there. Otherwise, why would you still be reading this
drivel? Happy hunting!
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.