Find better matches with our advanced matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


39 M Seattle, WA

My Details

Last Online
Aug 25
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Strictly anything
Graduated from Ph.D program
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Has a kid, and wants more
English, C++

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm an adventurous, open-minded, poly guy. I work in high-tech, but you'll find me an odd kind of geek. I enjoy motorcycle riding and being on the water. I live along the shore of the ocean, and the rhythm of the tide is the clock of my life. I travel light and often and am comfortable being plopped down most places in the world without reservations, left to just find my way. I have an awesome primary life partner already, and cool non-primary partner that I see regularly. But I do have just enough space in my life left for a non-primary but romantic and loving relationship. (I don't like the term secondary, because I do prefer to be dating someone with the potential to develop real loving feelings, and secondary just seems diminutive for such significant emotionally-attached relationships).

My day job is I am a professor at UW in the engineering school. I spend about a third of my time spinning tales to undergraduates about circuits and bits, a third working with graduate students imparting a zest for life, and a third handling.. err, BS. Oh and I'm working on spinning off another startup company from our work. Somewhere in there I'm supposed to actually think for a living, but usually I have to rely on my graduate students to do that for me. Thank goodness for all the beautiful minds around me.

Here's a bit more about me that helps round out the short summary above:

I have an awesome daughter (two and a half) and primary life partner. While I am very happily coupled, we hold space in our relationship for us to embrace other loves. Many people call this polyamorous or poly while others call it "open". If you're not comfortable with this then we're not going to work out. While everyone does poly differently, I prefer to date others with the goal being that love will actually enter the picture after awhile. In other words, I'm not looking for a casual relationship but rather something with real emotional connection. My partner and I don't date as a couple and to be clear, I (not us) am looking to build a romantic relationship with you. But, this is honest and open non-manogamy here. Ideally (although by no means required) you'd be comfortable having a (platonic) dinner with my primary partner now and then just to keep communication open between everyone. (And note to other polyamorous folks, I am obviously happy to meet your partners and work on building friendships with them).

I really enjoy my motorcycle. I just came back from a 5500 mile trip. Usually I cross the country, but this time I took the long way to Minnesota and back. Almost all of those miles was on two lane or dirt roads. I'm slowing moving more into adventure / duel-sport riding. Most nights I camped in the dirt. I take these trips every year and I enjoy the tales it brings and the people I meet. Being on a motorcycle connects you to the world in a way that a car cannot.

I just said goodbye to my sailboat, a Clipper-Ketch. It was difficult to part with her, as I've been off shore in the pacific with her and let's just say we've been through some tight spots together. But it was time. Raising my daughter and all the other stuff going on with my life has made my life rather full. But there will be other boats in my future. For now I'll just have to make do with my little fishing runabout.

While almost all of the remaining time I have in my life is filled up raising my amazing daughter, I do manage to squeeze in a few other pursuits, including making children's toys and photography. For better or worse, I also travel a lot. I'm on track for 60K miles this year. A small sampling from the last couple of years: Vermont (x3), DC (x5), SFO (xN), LA, Spain, Israel, Palestine, Ireland, Turkey, Japan (upcoming), London (x2) blah blah blah, it kind of blends together into a continuous string of cities, cultures, and adventures after awhile. I enjoy traveling, but you won't find me at the usual tourist spots. I'm more often hanging out at the pub or a campsite with some locals I've met, experiencing how the real people live.

Longer term there's many adventures I've queued up. I want to hike the Wonderland trail around Mt Rainier. I'm going to head back to Alaska but on my motorcycle. I also want to take my bike up to Hudson Bay one of these days. The UK and Japan seems to be taking shape later this year.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Currently I am busy raising my beautiful young daughter with my life partner. I'm also spending some lovely evenings with a non-primary partner in Seattle. They are are all fabulous! I'm also spending far too much time on an airplane (when the flight crew recognizes you, well, then you know you are spending too much time with them -- thank you Alaska Airlines though!).
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I'm pretty good at letting bad memories fade and finding the silver lining in any situation. I have a gallows and sarcastic sense of humor that isn't always funny to anyone but me. In my day job, my chief task is to ask questions that make you question your reality. I enjoy it. I roll with the punches pretty well and don't sweat the small stuff.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I'm really into music and I like a very wide range. From very early folk/country, to Dylan, all the way up to today with bands like MGMT, Brooke Fraser, etc, yes -- even the fame monster. I don't own a TV, but do occasionally watch a show online. Nevertheless, you will find me pathetically (or charmingly) ignorant of TV/movies and perhaps nerdy about music.

I am a foodie and a locavore. I enjoy a very fine meal out or in. My partner and I often throw large dinner parties at our place, and we enjoy the whole process from cooking to entertaining. Despite enjoying fine dining, I am also a bit of a connoisseur of Seattle's best hole-in-the-wall places and down home food as well, BBQ, Fried Cat Fish, Taco Trucks, etc. I am an adventurous eater, and will consume anything (breast milk cheese -- bring it on).

For books, my all time favorites would be Catch-22, because it always confuses and explains me; 1984 because I feel like I'm living it; and Air Kissing in the Northeast, which defines my childhood. I have been slowly working on writing a not quite sequel, sequel to Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, and a photo book about abstract low contrast images.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Love, Music, the Wind, the Ocean, a lingering sunset spent sharing a beer among friends, my motorcycle (I know you are like huh? But yeah,...)
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
There is no typical Friday night. So ignoring the question, here is what in my imagination would be a perfect relationship between you and I. First and foremost, we are friends that genuinely enjoy each other's company. We write deep and thoughtful letters to each other and share our minds and our bodies. I feel love and naturally give love through physical touch and correspondence (although I'm adaptable for the right person). We meet once or twice a week around town. Have a nice dinner, talk about life, see some live music, or do some outdoor activity. We're attracted to each other physically and mentally. We care about the relationship we are building with each other and value it. When we are together we hold hands (I'm not a secret poly), caress each other, kiss, charm and flirt. If the mood and the time strikes us we let that attraction comfortably spill into passion. If not, that is fine too, as we still enjoy our friendship.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I work (toil?) in a professional position that requires me to be "out there" and "on performance" all the time. Yet ironically, I was born shy. You'll actually find I need to warm up to you before I really share a lot in person. That is, unless you ask me to use my "speaking voice", in which case, well, the show must go on.

I'm an open minded poly gentle switch who's sexually attracted to femininity. Feel free to ask more about that statement if you're curious.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 23–43
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
I'm an open minded individual with a complex mix of carefree and drive. I don't idle well. In my day job, I strive hard to find truth and essence among the cluttered thoughts in the room. Elsewhere in life, I let it ride and don't sweat the small stuff. I care passionately about dreams and friends. I will support your dreams and I spend a lot of time pursuing mine. I have a few, but very deep friendships. When my friends drop in late at night, they don't ask to stay with me, they know the door is unlocked and where the spare bedroom is -- they know I'll see them in the morning. I don't consider my work a job, so much as a lifestyle. My students are part of my family, and I would (and have) gone to the ends of the earth for them.

Ideally what I am looking for is a funny, witty, attractive friend who also enjoys romance and passion. You should be either in an open / poly relationship or single and comfortable with the fact that I have a very loving life partner and an awesome non-primary partner already. I'm imagining we'll get together a few times a month, hang out around town or elsewhere in this beautiful state or world, get to know each other and build a lasting loving relationship that we both value as a supportive, positive, and sexy part of ours lives. If this sounds interesting to you, please message me. I'll be happy to point you to my real name (which will tell you a lot about me), and we can see if there's enough mutual interest in meeting over coffee or drinks, etc.