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25 M Olivehurst, CA

My Details

Last Online
Today – 3:44pm
6′ 3″ (1.91m)
Body Type
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Scorpio, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from university
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids
Likes dogs and likes cats
English, Danish

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My self-summary
I'm just on here looking for a girl who thinks I'm prettiest when I've just woke up in the morning with no make-up on, and someone who knows the difference between jelly and jam.

I also like women who have the sense of mind to interrupt a David Lynch movie and just be like, "I don't know WHAT the fuck is going on."


Here are some precautionary things about me: I like drinking quite a bit, I play video games constantly, I make obscure movie references, my humor is pretty dark, I work many hours of the week and occasionally have to go overseas for my work.

If you've made it through that, hello! Nice to meet you. The last few years of my life I spent going to college for a BA in international relations. My original plan was to join an international crime investigation team, to be a crack sleuth, but my prospects ended up taking one look at me and laughing me out of the office. They don't really like half-hungover college students who smell like bourbon and doritos for recruitment. No matter though, I found a job I like much more. And my potential as an investigator hasn't waned completely yet, I may go back to them in the future for my love of travel and intrigue.

On a given Friday night, you could find me anywhere from a seedy bar downtown to a hookah lounge or an upscale restaurant, or possibly blowing more money than I reasonably should at a casino. I enjoy taking my time driving aimlessly around dark cities and settling in unusual settings with a double scotch and soda. Or maybe I'll spend a weekend hiking along the California coast with friends. That side of me can be spontaneous and adventurous, almost always ending with some new, enlightening experience. The other side of me can be very quiet and introverted, where I'll just spend time playing video games, writing, painting, watching movies or listening to music. That's the side of me that will hide under the covers and watch a House of Cards marathon and drink mimosas all day.
What I’m doing with my life
Operating my part-time international aeronautics sabotage home business.
I’m really good at
Driving semi-trucks through fast food restaurants, going through fast food restaurants in reverse, impersonating grief counselors and ballroom dancing.
The first things people usually notice about me
My classically handsome bone structure.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Just ask. I have a wide range of interests in all those categories and very complex opinions about each of them.
The six things I could never do without
1. My own debonair personality.
2. My ability to control the weather.
3. Balvenie.
4. Weapons Grade Uranium.
6. The Deep Web
On a typical Friday night I am
Drinking and burning bridges.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
All roses have their thorns, and nothing I changed or added made it any better.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 18–35
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
You want to drink some craft beer and watch the sunset in Minecraft.