Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Rather than be cliche here are some random thoughts that I believe
may provide some insight into myself. It's either that or avoid
being cliche by listing myself as humorless, apathetic, lethargic,
dangerously unhealthy, and very high strung.
- Every other wild animal retreats at the presence of humans,
except geese. They will cross a road in the middle of rush hour
traffic, and if you come across one in a park they will chase you
away....unless you bribe them with bread. Geese are kind of the
assholes of the animal kingdom.
- At this time of the year I envision that hot chocolate, maple
syrup, and root vegetables sit together wondering who pumpkin's
agent is and how he got pumpkin put into every food product for the
next three months. Nothing is safe from pumpkin....even butter is
scared that pumpkin is starting to move in on his turf. I like to
imagine food has "turf".
- Why is some soap antibacterial and others aren’t? Isn’t the point
of soap to be antibacterial? Why would I buy non-antibacterial
soap? Regular soap really needs to up it’s game. Bush league
regular soap, bush league.
- If I was given a time machine I think my only choice would be to
use it stop tragedies and such Quantum Leap style, but not for
personal gain mainly because I don't understand how things work.
How exactly does electricity or the internal combustion engine
work? I could go back in time, but I still wouldn't be able to
invent the car or start Google. I'd just be sitting around in the
past waiting for Ben Franklin to fly a kite and some guy to invent
the Internet. I should have paid more attention in science
- If dogs ever evolved to speak human languages and entered into
society how long do you think it would take them to understand that
their poo isn't currency? It must be confusing for them....we stand
behind them collecting it at every opportunity. They must think we
- I possess superior door etiquette. However, superior door
etiquette has its drawback. While I open the car door for a woman,
I'll also hold the door open for people leaving a building at the
same time as me even if they are a few seconds from the door. I
suspect at times the someone scurrying towards door thinks to
him/herself "this guy's pushing the superior door etiquette too
far, I think I just twisted my ankle scurrying towards the
door...and why did I just describe my pace as a scurry?"
- At what age can a man use smiley faces in emails? I mean it's
acceptable for a child, and a grandpa can do it and be considered
adorable, but as a 34 year old man I think that if I started using
them in emails people would find it kind of strange. I just
realized, smiley faces are ageists.
- Why is the car the only machine it's acceptable to speak to and
call by a nickname? If you nickname your car no one gives it a
second thought, I mean they may think you're a dork, but it's not
automatically a sign of craziness. However, if you nickname your
favorite frying pan people automatically assume you believe your
pots and pans are real. (note, I don't have a favorite frying
pan....mainly because I think the pots would get jealous).
- Owls. I don't want to generalize, but seriously almost every
woman I know loves owls and owl related merchandise? All of a
sudden owls became a thing and no questioned it, least all of me as
I have bought owl related gifts for what seems like years. It makes
me wonder if men could pull off something similar and pick a random
member of the animal kingdom to become our spirit animal...like
what if we all simultaneously became enamored by lemurs?
I like to keep things light, but I do have a serious side including
serious characteristics like ambition, goals,and the ability to
cook a nutritious meal. I also think of myself as a good guy and
pride myself on what I believe that means including loyalty and
empathy. It would be great to meet someone that shares those
qualities and also isn't afraid to let her inner goofy side shine.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Medical Malpractice Insurance broker. I was English major in
college, so like most English majors I have a bookshelf that
demonstrates that I went to college, and my job is not in
"English". However, I can discuss Auden, Shakespeare, and pretend
to appreciate Ezra Pound as I believe is the case with most English
majors. Oh, and I'm also keeping it real 24/7....I think people
still say keeping it real. Ok, I'm keeping it real 23/7 and the
other hour I spend trying to learn new slang.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Chili. I've won multiple office chili cook offs. It may not be the
sexiest skill set, but it might just be the heartiest.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I would say my rapier wit and boyish charm, and clearly my
humility. I've seen many woman list answers to this question and
then say "but it's probably just my boobs". I don't think the same
holds true for what women notice about me, but just in case I'll
also say it's probably my tatas.
Also, I've been told that I dress a lot preppier than my tastes and
sense of humor reflect.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
My tastes run the gamut from dumb comedies to foreign films. I love
to watch the Sunday morning news of the week shows, followed by
Movies: Noir and black comedies like Rushmore, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang,
The Seventh Seal, Blow Up and The Killers are among my favorites. I
also like to see how Netflix determines recommendations for a guy
that watches a 1960s Italian film followed by Role Models. I hope
one day it just says "I have no clue".
In terms of music, a wide range of tastes; Dylan, Tom Waits, The
Jayhawks, Okervil River, Elliott Smith, Sam Cooke, Velvet
Underground. I'm a big fan of old soul music.
I've been on a Dennis Lehane kick recently. Before that I was
reading The Unwinding. Gone Baby Gone was a really great
mystery/detective story and The Unwinding is an extremely
interesting look at the current state of America. Some of my
favorite writers are Fitzgerald, Faulkner, Philip Roth, and Raymond
Food: I'll try anything at least once. Shellfish is one of my
favorite menu items, I wish I could thank whoever first decided
that eating an oyster looked appetizing. Whenever I travel, eating
new cuisine is one of my favorite parts of the trip. I can say with
confidence that if I lived in certain cities I would obese within a
month. New Orleans - I would end up one of those guys on Springer
that needs a crane to get him taken out of the house.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Coffee would be needed, without it I couldn't figure out the other
And obviously cream for my coffee
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Why a mustache doesn't have a middle ground. Either it looks good
and you're Tom Selleck, or it looks creepy and you're the guy that
looks like he drives a white van with no windows who makes hair
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I grew up with two sisters who regularly took the remote from me.
Therefore, I unfortunately can quote Steel Magnolias. "Drink your
juice Shelby". It haunts my dreams. Sidenote, after writing this I
immediately did something manly.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
I'm genuinely looking for something more meaningful at this point.
I'd like to find the person that I can enjoy adventures with, even
if they are as mundane as going to Target to buy
toothpaste....because I think the person that can make buying
toothpaste a fun activity is the person you stick with.
Who are you looking for?
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