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35 Durham, NC Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 25–40
  • Near me
  • For new friends, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 4:09am
6′ 3″ (1.91m)
Body Type
Strictly anything
Agnosticism, but not too serious about it
Scorpio, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from masters program
Open relationship
Doesn’t want kids
Has dogs and has cats
English (Fluently), C++ (Fluently), Japanese (Poorly)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm married (to akiko_bella) and am primarily interested in finding new friends or ladies interested in very casual dating. Between work and running a meetup group my life is usually pretty busy and I'm very dedicated to my wife, so if you're looking for anything more serious than hanging out in a friendly manner with the odd outing for dinner or activities you're probably barking up the wrong tree. But I'm also not in the market for casual sex, so don't think that I'm trying to lure you in with clever subterfuge.

You'll also have to be able to get along with my wife, but she's pretty awesome so I wouldn't expect that to be a problem.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Software engineer by day, wannabe novelist by night, and geek-of-all-trades the rest of the time.

I did my master's in physics and will always love science but life has lead me down the path of writing code all day. It's not so bad, though; I still get to solve problems.

When I'm not working I run a meetup group for geeky activities and/or non-geeky activities performed in geeky company. Boardgames, movies, the odd wine or beer tasting, that sort of thing.

My passion for writing varies in intensity over time. I've written several novels (all genre fiction) but haven't gotten further in the publication process than having agents request (and then reject) copies of manuscripts. Yet hope springs (well, mostly kind of trickles) eternal so maybe one day.

When I don't want to sit in a chair staring at a computer anymore I run. My first half-marathon wasn't terribly long ago but I'm hoping to get up to a full one in the moderately near future.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
All kinds of things, if I'm being immodest.

I'm not as good at advanced mathematics as I once was but I still know my way around a cotangent bundle.

Unbiased third parties have told me that I am not without talent at writing.

My employer seems to think I'm a better-than-competent programmer.

I make a mean Moroccan stew, have finally learned how to grill various meats correctly, and was told by someone with a gluten allergy that my homebrewed beer was good enough to be worth poisoning himself.

While I wouldn't go so far as to call myself an artist, I can generally produce things that look about the way they did in my head.

I am absolutely spectacular at losing at boardgames.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm really tall. That's pretty much the unanimous consensus. A lot of people think I look vaguely angry but it's just the shape of my forehead; I'm hardly ever actually angry.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
In reverse order...

Food: I'm not a vegetarian but I eat a whole lot of plant matter. Italian, Lebanese, and various other forms of Mediterranean rank high on my to-eat list. I also enjoy Asian (both East- and -Subcontinent varieties), particularly sushi. I've a deep and abiding love of hot wings (and pretty much anything spicy, really) and will stop loving cookies when I'm dead. Probably.

Music: I listen to all kinds of stuff. MP3s are cool and all but Pandora is the best thing to ever happen to my musical listening habits. Most of the time I stick to electronica, new rock, and weird hip-hop like Scroobius Pip or Ruckus Roboticus.

Shows: Whatever's on HBO at the moment, about a third of the things SyFy makes that are actually sci-fi, and the usual variety of super-popular non-reality-TV series like The Walking Dead, Breaking Bad, Doctor Who, and so forth. I used to watch a lot of anime but have fallen mostly out of the habit.

Movies: I do not often go in for artsy movies. Things don't have to explode or have lasers on them for me to enjoy a movie, but if they do the odds of it happening do trend upward. I think I've watched every horror movie on Netflix with a 2 star or higher rating and a number of them that only have 1.5ish. The movie I've seen the most times is probably still The Fifth Element, though I wouldn't peg it as my all-time favorite. If it's got Daniel Craig, Jason Stathem, Simon Pegg, or Robert Downey Junior in it I'm willing. Though that does occasionally backfire on me (I'm looking at you, In the Name of the King). I'll indulge in ridiculously awful movies like Sharktopus in the right company.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Other than the obvious stuff like 'air'...

*Cats and animals that look like cats (otters, binturongs, members of the weasel family, certain lizards... My definition of feline is a little broad). Dogs and stuff are okay too, I guess.

* Reference media. I am full of questions that I want answers to and am spoiled by the existence of the internet.

* Cookies. They are the only classical food which remain un-corrupted by healthiness and exist in a sort of transcendental state between baked good and elemental deliciousity.

* Games. Boardgames, card games, video games, role-playing games, certain varieties of things that might be referred to as 'sports'...

* Books. I often feel like that guy in the Twilight Zone episode who ends up with the tragically broken glasses. So many books, so little time.

* Caffeine. I've tried going without it and it's just unpleasant.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
...Stuff? I think about all manner of things. Novel ideas, physics and engineering problems, work-related programming challenges, non-work-related programming, cute animal pictures I saw on the internet, game design, The Future, how much money I could make on the stock market if I were able to travel back in time to the mid 1980's using only the current contents of my bank account, how to estimate the ratio of momentum transfer per unit time between solar wind and a moon-based laser of some power for a metallic asteroid of arbitrary reflectivity... You know. Stuff.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
My social schedule is dense and complicated. Less so than my wife's, though, so if there's no some sort of event going on then Friday nights are usually one of:
* Date night with the wife
* Watching TV with her and the cat collection because we're tired from the rest of the week
* Playing video games because she's off somewhere without me.

Occasionally Friday nights are for beer-making.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I don't really have privacy issues. I'll admit to just about anything to almost anyone.

I'm really bad at chit-chat? I think Helen Hunt is hot (not now, but back in, like, the late 90's/early-2000's)? I dunno. Send me a message with a super-private-personal-type question and if I refuse to answer I'll buy you a cookie. Then either you'll know my dark secrets or we'll be sharing the experience of delicious baked goods. How can you turn down a challenge like that?
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
There is no if! You should just message me! At the worst I'll think you're not my type and won't message you back, then you've lost probably less time than you already spent reading this. At best you find out embarrassing secrets about me/get a free cookie and then we go on to have a fantastical friendship that one day leads us to explore the steaming rain forests of Borneo and shadowed alleyways of Budapest in search of the lost treasures of a secretive order of 16th century natural philosophers. Or at least we play some sweet boardgames together. Whichever.