Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I have decided to include a template in my profile to help others
in the creation of their own profile! It's difficult to be
original, I know, but with this handy template, you can't possibly
[Begin with disclaimer about not really wanting to using this site,
but using it anyway. Be sure to reference that a friend recommended
the site to you - the more you distance yourself from the site, the
more insecure you look, and everyone loves insecurity! Spelling is
overrated - you're searching for a date, not writing a paper for
your English professor, am I right or am I right?
Don't be afraid to add a lot of history about yourself. When people
tell you that they don't want to hear your life story, it's because
they actually want to hear your life novel!
Remember, the more you write, the better. After all "Brevity is the
soul of wit" which I'm pretty sure means you should write a shit
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
[Be sure to be as vague as possible - everybody loves a mystery,
especially about whether you're employed or not!]
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
[Talking about things you can do while inebriated is appropriate
here. Remember, being wasted is hilarious, and discussing whatever
dumb stuff you do while wasted (like drunk-dialing the ex, pissing
on beds, or eating at taco bell) is good content.]
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
[Regardless of what this template says, you're probably going to
put "my eyes" because having a section about "The First Things
People Usually Notice About Me" is pretty stupid in the first
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
[This paragraph is for your interests. Make sure you state that you
enjoy laughing and having fun, because there's lots of people who
hate laughing and having fun, and this could be a serious
dealbreaker later on.
I recommend against saying that you "enjoy" stuff you were forced
to read at high school, like Moby Dick or Tale of Two Cities.
Because everyone knows that nobody born after 1950 actually enjoyed
either of those novels, and even if you did, you definitely
shouldn't tell anyone about it.
Also if you talk about music, make sure that you just say you love
"everything" except, of course, rap music.]
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
[Make sure to mention water or air, because that's extremely
original and hilarious!]
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
[You're going to end up lying here, so don't worry about it.
Everybody does on this section]
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
[If the person reading your profile has made it this far, they
probably already know]
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
[This is an OKC version of a trick question! Despite what the
question is asking, nobody really wants to hear about what you do
with your used condoms, dirty tampons, or how you had to use the
sink instead of the toilet when it got clogged. Nobody.]
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
...you like/want to go hiking, message immediately.
...you can read between the lines.
...you can give me some decent book recommendations. I have a
pretty bad habit of suffering through terrible books after I start
them because I'm a completionist like that. So I try not to start
them in the first place unless I'm pretty confident that they're
not going to suck.
And for those who need something to go off of: I love listening to
music (anything but rap), laughing, and just having fun!
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.