You're looking for a great friend and partner, particularly if the
You read books! Real ones!
You have a kick-ass sense of humor.
You create things. :D
You want to take me fishing.
Do NOT message me if:
You cannot power walk for at least two blocks. I need someone who
can physically keep up with me. I'm an extremely active person and
if I'm not moving around at least a little bit,- I will go insane.
I will get bored. If my butt is numb, I am not pleasant
You require me to text you constantly. I have extremely limited
texting and I save it for emergencies. :P If you have a problem
with this, turn back now.
You do not have reading comprehension skills of at least a sixth
grader. I’m not asking that you be the most observant person on the
face of the earth, but seriously? Reading. It’s awesome.
You are active duty Military or planning on becoming such. Yes, I
know it looks bad, but I've BEEN a Military girlfriend.
You have a problem with me owning cats. I like cats, cats have been
a whole lot nicer and less complicated than any man has ever been
to me. It's fine if you're not a fan, but I will gladly get rid of
a boyfriend before I get rid of any of my animals.
You have a problem with me occasionally indulging in Hookah, craft
cider, Jack Daniels or any other form of not-for-everyone grownup
You have a problem with girls who wear makeup, color their hair or
wear corsets, shapewear or high-heals. Guess what? I'm an art
person. My body is one, giant, blank, canvas. I'm not trying to
trick anybody. I'm not trying to offend anybody. I'm REALLY sick of
receiving random messeges from guys on this subject. Seriously, I'm
a little sad to have to put this here.
You do not like super open communication. I am not Miss Cleo and I
don't expect you to be either. I am a social battering ram. I do
not understand the dialect of Girl.
Super cheat sheet: Some things I LIKE:
I typically like older men. I can't say why, but guys my own age
tend to be kind of not-my-thing. This isn't to say I wouldn't give
a guy my age a chance, but I really do like dudes a bit older and
I like BIG tall guys, but I don't dislike shorter gentlemen. You
know the saying, "A woman always marries her father"? Well, I come
from a long line of Fe-Fi-Fo-Fum. Big, heavy-set, Russian
dudes. What can I say? They
attract my attention.
That being said, I do like the chubbier guys. A. Lot. Their just
big solid and utterly hug-able. They also give the best hugs and I
demand good hugs.
Face-fuzz. I love face fuzz. Did I mention this? Because I LOVE
face fuzz. Hell, fuzz in general. I'm SUPER attracted to the wookie
look. Serious plus if you can make the sound for my amusement.
I have a weakness for blondes and gingers. :3 I do love all colors
of people and all colors and textures of hair, but there's just
SOMETHING about the light hair.
TLDR: I'll do what I want, take it, leave it, love it, hate it.