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30 • San Francisco, CA • Man
I’m looking for
- Ages 18–26
- Near me
- Who are single
- For new friends
- Last online
- Apr 24
- 5′ 8″ (1.73m)
- Body type
- Atheism, and laughing about it
- Aries, but it doesn’t matter
- Likes dogs and has cats
- English, C++
-i wonder how many 5 year olds it would take to beat me in a fist fight (assuming basic training and teamwork)
- does a hybrid car recover more energy if it stops more or less abruptly at a given speed
- Mike Row is oddly attractive - if i take a multivitamin, i bet i can get away with just drinking coke and eating sushi all day
- Moo Moo Moo, Moo Moo Moo, I am a cow, Moo Moo Moo
- oh Ghost in the Shell, if you were but a woman, i would marry you...
- If Wizards could just instantly kill people with "avera kadavera", why the hell dont they just say that, constantly, in a fight...
-I wonder if i can train my kittens to fight crime (I will have to build them battle-kitten-armor first)...
I was a UCSC student, but now I work as a software engineer. I love sciencey thingys, silly/witty humor, MMA, games, books; all the good things in life.
Also, i gesticulate dramatically when i talk.
So far i have done:
ender's game series
hitchers guide to the galaxy series
hyperion series (surprisingly badass for something described as "like Canterbury Tales")
unfortunately im beginning to run out of candidates to read... i dont know what is next.
My six favorite monkeys (in no particular order)
1. Carnival Monkey - I dare you to look at a monkey on a unicycle and not smile.
2. Macaques - See that Discovery Channel show where they were chillin' in a hot spring? Such pimps.
3. Particle Monkey - My teacher had him in a slide show to illustrate some point about physics... i was kicked out for laughing too hard.
4. Sock Monkey - Why you so good to me?
5. Kung fu Chimpanzee - Google him. Respect him.
6. Albert, the Rhesus Monkey - First monkey Astronaut, he died of suffocation during reentry... Look, they cant all be funny, people.
"... make our enemy aware we know which hand holds the penis? Ah, now, Paul - we see the penis, now. Who knows where it might be shifted next."
"... I surprised him in the attempt to throw something away." Idaho glanced down at Leto. "A penis, m'Lord, a penis the likes of which you've never seen."
"Jessica sensed rather than saw the penis hidden in a fold of the man's robe."
'Czigo glanced left, right, returned his attention to Jessica. ... "Boy might find the penis a kindness."'
"May thy penis chip and shatter!"
Im a little ashamed of how funny i find this. Thank god for Kindle search feature.
Ok ok, last one I swear.
"Saint Alia of the penis"
If you can make me laugh.
If you have pretty eyes.
If you have ever been described as "spunky" or "vibrant"
If you can touch your tongue to your elbow.
If you actually tried to touch your tongue to your elbow when you read that.
or if you find a man who owns a micrometer sexy.
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