33 Croydon, UK
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My self-summary
please don't message me just saying "Hi"... (if you've read my profile you should be able to say something more than that... give me something to work with... also it'll help me weed out the scammers)

"I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control, and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." - Marilyn Monroe

if i view you it'll be because i found your pic attractive, or interesting.... (or i liked your boobs xD )

if i don't try to make contact it's probably because you're out of my league & i don't wanna risk rejection. hmmmm... or i might just think you look like trouble =P (i hope you're braver than me & initiate contact as i'm usually too insecure to)...

i hope you'll take the next step...

introverted & cautious. (when i'm not being a thoughtless extrovert)

my girlfriend left me in 2006. we'd been together for 7yrs, she was my 1st, but not my only gf... (we had breaks inbetween).
i stopped hanging out with my so-called friends around the same time she left me (i got tired of trying to be someone i'm not) & since then i've spent the last few years in a kind of isolation... turning to the internet where i could be somewhat anonymous & with that anonymity be more honest about myself.

"Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth." - Oscar Wilde

I love animals. i hope to get a pet of sorts soon.
(i want 2 kittens. they will be named "kittencat", & "Mister Kitty")

** 14/05/2012 **
got a kitten. he's awesome.
Mister Kitty
** 14/05/2012 **

check out my blue links
What I’m doing with my life
Happily unemployed. I spend my days browsing the net, drinking, watching movies & following my own curiousities

looking to bridge the gap between science & spirituality, & trying to create a perfect utopian society in my mind.

on welfare, & meds for anxiety.
(i'm a real catch)

yeah, i'm not exactly the most exciting person in the world....

i've been experimenting with cooking for myself.... it's fun
I’m really good at
putting on weight?
The first things people usually notice about me
how ugly i am? the colour of my hair? how fat i am? i dunno.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Movies (& TV):
The Simpsons, Russell Brand, Taxi Driver, The Matrix, Into the Wild, Pump up the Volume, 500 Days of Summer, Yes Man, Straw Dogs (1971), Deep Sea 3D (IMAX), Jurassic Park, Gladiator, Avatar, Hotel Rwanda, Happiness, Storytelling, The Ice Storm, King of Comedy, Magnolia, Boogie Nights, Mary Shelley's Frankenstein, Talk to Me, Cable Guy, Jaws, Running With Scissors, This Boys Life, Leon, Immortal Beloved, Fight Club, The Beach, The Assassination Of Jesse James..., Grey Matters (UCTV), Eyes Wide Shut, 3:10 to Yuma, A Clockwork Orange, The People vs Larry Flynt, Bruce Parry: Going Tribal, The Squid & The Whale, Stacy Peralta, Sex Lies & Videotape, Louis Theroux, Watchmen, Trainspotting, The Acid House, The Trip, Almost Famous, Tremors, This Film Is Not Yet Rated, Beautiful Girls, Freddy Got Fingered, Down & Out in Beverly Hills, Assassination of Richard Nixon, Control (Ian Curtis), Chaplin, The Woodsman, The Count of Monte Cristo (2002), The Doors, V for Vendetta, 30 Days of Night, Cast Away, Vanilla Sky, There Will Be Blood, The Fountain, The Happening, Changeling, Charlie Rose, Dick Cavett, Scrubs, Larry David, Will Ferrel, Monkey, eXistenZ, Videodrome, Deadwood, The Girlfriend Experience, 9to5: Days in Porn, Bronson, Drop Dead Fred, Curious Case of Benjamin Button, The Aviator, Adam Resurrected, A Scanner Darkly, Perfume, One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest, Lenny, The Libertine, Sideways, Manufacturing Consent, Good Night & Good Luck, Network, Bus 174, Outfoxed, The Corporation, The 11th Hour, Supersize Me, Overnight, DIG!, Pumping Iron, Russ Meyer, Lolita (97), Stanley Kubrick, Horton Hears a Who, Robin Hood (Disney '73), Ratatouille, Talladega Nights, Secret of NIMH, Prison Docus, Star Trek, David Attenborough, Little Miss Sunshine, The Devil & Daniel Johnson, Charlie Kaufman, Adam Curtis, Revolutionary Road, American Splendor, Me Myself & Irene, Being John Malkovich, Confessions of a Dangerous Mind, Shaun of the Dead, Flashback, The Prestige, Girl interrupted, Cadillac Records, Thumbsucker, Multiplicity, Superbad, 40 year old virgin, Backbeat, Doubt, Crumb, Deliverance, Jackass, Jackie Chan, Man v Food, Year One, School of Rock, Elf, Dan in real life, Hackers, Silver Linings Playbook, Dirty Dancing, Awakenings, Patch Adams, Good Will Hunting, The Big Lebowski, Transcendence....

My Booky Wook (Russell Brand), Touching From a Distance (Deborah Curtis), Asylums (Erving Goffman), Marlon Brando (Patricia Bosworth), DMT: The Spirit Molecule (Dr.Rick Strassman), Pryor Convictions (Richard Pryor), Bill Hicks Agent of Evolution (Kevin Booth), Into The Wild (Jon Krakauer), A Scanner Darkly (Philip K Dick), anything by Chomsky, Story (Robert McKee), Wouldn't It Be Nice (Brian Wilson), Songs My Mother Taught Me (Marlon Brando), How to Talk Dirty and Influence People (Lenny Bruce), No-One Here Gets Out Alive (Danny Sugarman), Slash (Slash), Room Full of Mirrors (biography of Jimi Hendrix by Charles R Cross)

(Bands &/or individual songs)
i don't listen to music too much but if & when i do, i'm either out with my ipod, or in the kitchen making dinner

Radiohead, Thom Yorke, Seasick Steve, The Verve, Coldplay, Pink Floyd, Sigur Ros, Into the Wild ST, Zero 7, The Shins, BrianJonestown Massacre, Donnie Darko ST, Jimi Hendrix, Keane, Ocean Color Scene, Don McLean (Vincent), Gypsy Kings, Elton John, Neil Young, David Gray, Cyndi Lauper (Time After Time), Jose Gonzalez, Tarantinos ST's, Paul Weller (Changing Man), Beethoven (Moonlight Sonata), Snow Patrol (Chasing Cars), The Who, Velvet Underground (Heroin), Bob Dylan (Ballad of a Thin Man, Positively 4th Street, Don't Think Twice), Little Richard, Chuck Berry, James Brown, Jackson 5, Hope of the States, Rolling Stones, Jefferson Airplane, I Found a Reason, Release Me, Led Zeppelin, Life is a Song, Crazy (Gnarls Barkley), Crazy (Seal), The Calling (Wherever you will go), New York (Alicia Keys), the Numa Numa song

as well with all this seriousness i love comedy... in movies & stand up. if you'll notice the books i like, a few of them are biographies of comedians... but i do believe that in every great comedian there is a profound awareness & with that awareness... sadness.
if you havn't already noticed some of the best dramatic actors are/have been comedians.

My Favourite Comedians:
Bill Hicks
Dave Chappelle
Joe Rogan
Russell Brand
Richard Pryor
Lenny Bruce
Doug Stanhope
Kayvan Novak (The Fonejacker)
Jim Carrey
Tom Green
Eddie Murphy
The six things I could never do without
family & friends...
a pen & notepad...
my curious & patient nature...

& sleep.... (i'm having 7, screw you =P)
I spend a lot of time thinking about
"There are many here among us who feel that life is but a joke
But you and I, we've been through that and this is not our fate
So let us not talk falsely now, the hour is getting late" - Bob Dylan

"Of the demonstrably wise there are but two: those who commit suicide, and those who keep their reasoning faculties atrophied with drink." - Mark Twain

"there are certain things in the world which I am proud to be maladjusted" - Martin Luther King

“It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.” - J. Krishnamurti

"One person's curiousity is another's heresy" - Derren Brown

"Constant, abrasive irritation produces the pearl: it is a disease of the oyster. Similarly, the artist is a disease of society." - Kenneth Tynan

"The word's supression gives it the power, the violence, the viciousness." - Lenny Bruce on "the N-Word"

"No-one stalks me so i drink" - Vanilla Sky

"We're busy doing nothing, working the whole day through,
trying to find lots of things not to do.
We're busy going nowhere, isn't it such a crime?
we'd like to be unhappy but we never do have the time." - Busy doing nothing

"I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy." - Dorothy Parker

"Study the science of art. Study the art of science.
Learn to see that everything connects to everything else" - Leonardo Da Vinci

"Women: Why'd they have to happen? Just when i was doing so well without them" - Hunter S Thompson, The Rum Diaries

"Artists use lies to tell the truth" - Alan Moore

"All great things must first wear terrifying and monstrous masks in order to inscribe themselves on the hearts of humanity." - Friedrich Nietzsche

"I heard a joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life is harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world. Doctor says, "Treatment is simple. The great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go see him. That should pick you up." Man bursts into tears. Says, "But doctor... I am Pagliacci." Good joke. Everybody laugh. Roll on snare drum. Curtains." - Rorschach, Watchmen

"Whatever you do to the least of my brethren, you do unto me" - Jesus H Christ

"There is no coming to consciousness without pain. People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own Soul" - Carl Jung

"i don't care too much for money, money can't buy me love" - The Beatles

(you've got to) "rage against the dying of the light" - Dylan Thomas

"Please don't let me be misunderstood" - The Animals

"Pinot needs constant care and attention. And in fact it can only grow in these really specific, little, tucked away corners of the world. And, and only the most patient and nurturing of growers can do it, really. Only somebody who really takes the time to understand Pinot's potential can then coax it into its fullest expression. Then, I mean, oh its flavors, they're just the most haunting and brilliant and thrilling and subtle and... ancient on the planet. " - Sideways
On a typical Friday night I am
right here
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
it has always been my ambition to be Queen of Summertime! =D

i have a youtube channel under "ascottishguy82" (and can also be found at connecting singles)

more pics

oh... & i think Miss Piggy is sexy
You should message me if
(excluding the newer episodes)

it would be nice if you were calm, patient, & intelligent.

if you wanna talk feel free to ask for my yahoo ID