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30 Brooklyn, NY Cis Woman

Cis Woman

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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 30-49
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 6:14pm
Asian, White
Seeing Someone
Relationship Type
Mostly non-monogamous
5' 5" (1.65m)
Body Type
Post grad
Doesn’t have kids but wants them
English, French (Somewhat)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Queer, hard high femme. My self-care is frozen yogurt and horror movies. I value exploration (of self and otherwise), am fascinated by politics, and feel deeply, deeply grateful to be excited and inspired by my work. I love to challenge my own beliefs on a regular basis and am absolutely up for a debate on a host of issues. I'm more than willing to admit when I'm wrong and often get excited to find new places to learn. I read voraciously, love music (playing, listening and even understanding theory), and figuring out different ways to be physical. I love exploration and new challenges and when I'm trying to wrap my head around something and get frustrated, I ground myself by putting things in order or doing math. My last op-ed was completed in tandem with color-arranging my bras (ROYGBIV!) and alphabetizing my playlists. I'm a curious cook and a tea drinker, and consider this opening to be painfully awkward. Keep reading. The directed questions are better.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Learning exactly what my limits are.
Picking my next tattoo.
I'm a policy advocate around laws on the sex trade, so I get to explore a lot of different areas of thinking and spend time with awesome people. I spend my days in my office getting to really dig into issues of criminalization, HIV, economic justice, and trafficking in persons (not "sex trafficking" - that's a phrase made up by disingenuous advocacy groups who wanted to single out and stigmatize the sex trade and it's really offensive. Please call it all "trafficking in persons." It's a thing with me. Seriously, if you use "sex trafficking" anywhere in your initial message I will not respond.) And I absolutely love my work. It's a privilege to love your job this much. I also watch a lot of Top Chef and read every chance I get.
This sounds so weirdly formal...
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Finding the silver lining.
Making a crass joke when necessary. OK, mostly when it's unnecessary.
Excel spreadsheets. I'm amazing at Excel spreadsheets.
Falling asleep in moving cars.
Unabashedly eating cereal straight from the box. Food is really good. It doesn't need much. Sometimes not even a spoon.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I smile a lot and I very often wear a bow or flower in my hair. Today it's an orange zinnia with a picture of a phonograph in the center.

I also wear incredibly short skirts, so I'm sure that doesn't go un-noticed. Especially considering the ridiculous number of pairs of tights/socks I will wear underneath to stay warm in the winter.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Music for Torching, Lolita, Angelica, Crash and Mrs. Dalloway. I'm generally reading one book to supplement the reports I get at work and one book for pleasure. My library cards get worked.

Movies: If I could go back to any pre-career-ish job and make a living, it would be as the video store girl, so this is tough. Pulp Fiction, Zodiac, Frida, Rosemary's Baby, Death Proof, Love Me If You Dare, We Don't Live Here Anymore. I'll watch whatever David Fincher or Quentin Tarentino put in front of me. And I love horror movies. Love. Love. You'll know I like you when I want you to come over and watch a horror movie and get takeout with me.

Food: There is something special about good fish tacos and a delicate jalapeno margarita. My perfect meal. But generally, I eat anything. I'm trying to expand my palette at the moment so you score points if you're a cook as well.

Music: Yo Yo Ma when I sleep. Elvis and Johnny Cash when I shower. Guys with guitars when I work. Isobel Campbell and Mark Lanegan when I want to feel like a femme fatale. Tom Petty's American Girl when I want to be in a great mood. Rack City at the gym. Patsy Cline, Melissa Manchester and Miranda Lambert when I want to karaoke. Dandy Warhols when I want to walk down the street in the city. And everything in between.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Stacks on stacks on stacks. Of books.
Black tea.
Liquid eye liner.
My boots.
Space and time to work out in some way. I get really anxious when I can't get my energy out.
Curiosity to know more.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
How things fit together.

The balance of building community identity versus respecting individualized experience.
The balance of providing leadership and guidance with promoting autonomy in capacity building.
The balance of complimenting colors and contrasting patterns when wearing tights, over-the-knee socks, and knee socks.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
When I'm having a bad day, I hate-tweet Nick Kristoff.

I've also seen Gigli. Twice.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You actually read this thing and you're still curious.

You're a Daddy at your core.

You're queer. I'm open to all folks across the gender spectrum. That said, I really am only looking to develop more serious relationships with people who are queer-identified. Straight, cis men, please feel free to give me a shout! I'm still opening to hanging out and something casual and fun and NSA, I'm just not looking to seriously date. And if you acknowledge that you read this part in your first message, you'll get a gold star or something. (Basically, if you're cis/straight/male-identified/down I need you to say so or I'll ignore your message.)

Also - I'm very political and I'm really passionate about my job and the subject that I work on. That doesn't mean that I *always* want to engage in answering questions about sex work, the sex trade or trafficking. That's my job, and I do it day in and day out and it can be incredibly draining. Do feel free to ask, but please be respectful if I'm not up for answering informational questions about trafficking at that given moment. Or donate $50 to my organization and I'll muster the energy. I often like to talk about it, I really do - but please respect my limits. And at the very least - ease into the conversation. Even when I'm on panels they start with an introduction.

Oh, and if you have a problem with a picture of the tattoo on my thigh... get off the internet. You don't deserve to be here.