New attorney, but you may call me "baby lawyer".
Seeking love, wine, stand up comedy and the meaning of life. In that order.
"I like long walks on the beach, that preferably end in a blowjob...receiving not giving. In fact if you see me giving one, please come help, I'm in trouble". - Kirk Fox
I'm from North Carolina. Also, sports
What I’m doing with my life
Pretending to be a criminal defense attorney
I’m really good at
The first things people usually notice about me
The fact that I am human man.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Magnolia, American Beauty, Casablanca, Annie Hall, The Apartment, American History X, Clerks, Office Space
High Fidelity, 1984, Notes from the Underground, Crime and Punishment, The Great Gatsby, Slaughterhouse Five, A Drink Before The War
Jeff Buckley, Tom Waits, Ryan Adams, Lil Dicky, Childish Gambino, Whiskeytown, Gaslight Anthem
Louis Ck, Hannibal Buress, Patton Oswalt, Marc Maron, Bill Burr
Maron, Arrested Development, Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Silicon Valley, Louie, Scrubs, Eastbound and Down, Kids in the Hall
The six things I could never do without
all six of my personalities
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Did I leave my house with pants on
Do I have a stain on my clothes
On a typical Friday night I am
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I once killed a man with a bow and arrow
You should message me if
Can handle humor, enjoy intellectual conversations, enjoy not being murdered, enjoy nice and genuine people.
Also, I'm great at drunk texting.