Ok, you’ve read a few dozen profiles today, so I’ll skip the cliche lines about how I like live music and going to concerts, how I just love to travel to Europe and places with drinks served in coconuts with little paper umbrella-ella-ellas in them, and that I am just as happy hitting the town with my friends as I am curled up on the couch sharing a snuggie with that special someone. Here is some background info about me that you may not have read twenty times already:
If it wasn't for TiVo, I would have little use for my TV and it would end up as a coffee table (side note: if it wasn't for the show LOST, I would sleep like a baby on Tuesday nights without being furious b/c I have no idea what’s going on with the parallel universe thing). When I have the time, I really like to experiment in the kitchen and can actually bake a pretty mean ziti (only set off the smoke detector once!). However, my enjoyment of cooking is overshadowed by my infatuation with eating…I’m a fat guy trapped in a normal-sized body. Seriously, if chicken wings were girls with questionable morals and I was Tiger Woods, I would be on TV apologizing right now, saying that I felt somehow entitled to eat all the wings in the basket, even though we were each only supposed to have one…
If you can’t already tell, my sense of humor isn’t what most doctors would call “normal” or “healthy” (I just made “air quotes” with my fingers, for emphasis), but if you get me, you’ll never go another day without laughing. Let’s say that we bumped into each other out in the wild; you would notice that I’m probably smiling, but you're not sure why, and there's a 50% chance that the people I’m with don't know why either...come to think of it, I may have no idea why, but it's there nonetheless. Sometimes I’ll smile or laugh for a moment and then completely forget what made me so happy...I’m special, I know.
Though my typical week has a severe shortage of free time, I try to pack as much of my weekends full of quality time with friends / teammates as possible (former rugby player and also compete in mixed martial arts fights and jiu jitsu tournaments, but I’m not crazy, promise). I really do have a fairly diverse range of interests; for instance I really enjoy walking down to Fado for a few pints with friends and maybe bust out some air guitar (don’t stop, belie-ven) or getting cleaned up for a night at the symphony (sans air guitar). I don’t hit the clubs as much as I used to, but on a big night out, I could end up at Door44, T& G (no dragon shirts), Cosmo/Lava, W, Ri Ra…pretty much wherever the mood hits. Now that the sun is out, any patio in the Highlands is always lots of fun.
My match: has a hot tub, isn't afraid to have a strong personality, good sense of humor (read: laughs at all my jokes), not a fan of drama unless it takes place in orange county, has a sensitive side & is also independent, knows it's better if we don't agree on everything. If you are fortunate enough to meet the right person, your laundry list of what you once considered to be ‘must haves’ seems insignificant compared with the reality of what you have discovered inside that person.
I read somewhere that bullet points are the most efficient way to communicate your message to the reader (which was, most likely, in its own bullet point), so here is the Cliff’s Notes version for you lazy girls:
-Stuck in an abusive relationship with the show LOST
-Tiger Woods-like addiction to food
-Unique sense of humor not fit for small children or most adults
-Smiles for no apparent reason; slight chance I may be up to no good
-Glutton for punishment, made apparent by close relationship with orthopedist
-Friends with club bouncers and symphony patrons alike
-Caution: been photographed singing and playing air guitar in bars
-Drama: bad…hot tub: good
-Talks a good game but a romantic at heart (just don’t tell)