After 13 years together, we think that the only way to be everything to each other is to a) recognize that we can't be everything to each other and b) to make room for that. It relieves a lot of pressure. No matter how much you love someone, you can't turn off your sexual interest and appetites for other people. The planning and sharing keep us closer together. Breaking down barriers and tensions turns us on.
P.S. Her profile is temporarily down, and we're kind of on hiatus from OKC, but I'll keep this up for now.