Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Self-Summation is bullshit. Enjoy this story instead:
My fondest memory from my childhood would have to be when I dropped
acid for the first time at the age of 6. Bob Barker knocked on my
door and asked me if I wanted to go for a ride on his spaceship.
Being a fan of both intergalactic space travel and The Price Is
Right, naturally I took him up on his offer. We boarded his
spacecraft and he told me that we’d be traveling to a far away
galaxy, but first he needed to stop off and settle some business on
On Neptune we arrived at a floating, neon pyramid which was the
home of Craig and Peggy Lnkgmrdnxvz(Neptunian surnames don’t
contain vowels. Duh!). Bob broke down the door and proceeded to
savagely beat this elderly couple with his 9-iron for not neutering
their cat. While leaving the pyramid, Bob screamed at them, “If
that cat’s not neutered within a week, I’m coming back here with my
We left Neptune and proceeded to exit our solar system. As we
entered a new galaxy, Bob asked me to fly the ship, as he was too
high on peyote to navigate his way through an asteroid field.
We went to a planet named Boobula, which is renowned for it’s
culture, emphasis on education and strip clubs. I had a great time
mingling with some lovely, 3-breasted women while sipping on a pina
colada as Bob introduced a group of ewoks to plinko. Fun Times!
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I'm really good at understanding when there's great chemistry. I'm
never hesitant to make the first move.
Also, the last girl I dated said I was the funniest person she had
ever met and that I've ruined other men for her in that department.
She's god damn right!
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
That I'm not wearing any pants. Also, I'm Asian.
Or, it might be that I'm devilishly handsome and adorable and I'm
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I'm just gonna do T.V. and movies, because that's all I feel like
doing right now.
My favorite directors are Martin Scorsese and Christopher Nolan.
I'm also a big fan of Tarantino, Spielberg, and Woody Allen. I also
think James Cameron is grossly overrated. My ten favorite movies
would have to be: Memento, L.A. Confidential, The Big Lebowski(If
you've never seen or don't like Lebowski, neither me nor anyone
else on this planet has any use for you.), The Departed, The Dark
Knight, Taxi Driver, Annie Hall, Silver Linings Playbook, The
Empire Strikes Back, 50/50 and Pulp Fiction.
T.V.: Breaking Bad(the greatest show ever to air on television),
Boardwalk Empire, 30 Rock, Parks and Recreation, Person of
Interest, The Daily Show, Colbert Report, Conan, Curb Your
Enthusiasm(Larry David is my hero!), Girls(Yeah, I watch Girls.
Marnie sucks!), Seinfeld, Arrested Development and The Larry
Sanders Show. There are probably others that I am not thinking of
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Doing something that most likely involves the consumption of
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Also, my Myers-Brigg type is INTP.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You enjoy a man who can make you laugh and are turned on by
I should point out that I don't have the capacity to be nice to
people I find to be stupid/unintelligent. For example, if you have
a picture of you with your kid on a dating profile, I'm not not
messaging you because you have a kid. I'm not messaging you because
you're an idiot.
I appreciate good grammar, so please know the difference between
your/you're, there/their/they're and then/than.
I'm also not above being attracted to someone for superficial
Who are you looking for?
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