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aidemyarj

32 M Portland, OR

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 6:03pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Thin
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
Trying to quit
Drinks
Often
Drugs
Religion
Agnosticism
Sign
Leo, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Dropped out of two-year college
Job
Art / Music / Writing
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Self-Summation is bullshit. Enjoy this story instead:

My fondest memory from my childhood would have to be when I dropped acid for the first time at the age of 6. Bob Barker knocked on my door and asked me if I wanted to go for a ride on his spaceship. Being a fan of both intergalactic space travel and The Price Is Right, naturally I took him up on his offer. We boarded his spacecraft and he told me that we’d be traveling to a far away galaxy, but first he needed to stop off and settle some business on Neptune.

On Neptune we arrived at a floating, neon pyramid which was the home of Craig and Peggy Lnkgmrdnxvz(Neptunian surnames don’t contain vowels. Duh!). Bob broke down the door and proceeded to savagely beat this elderly couple with his 9-iron for not neutering their cat. While leaving the pyramid, Bob screamed at them, “If that cat’s not neutered within a week, I’m coming back here with my woods!”

We left Neptune and proceeded to exit our solar system. As we entered a new galaxy, Bob asked me to fly the ship, as he was too high on peyote to navigate his way through an asteroid field.

We went to a planet named Boobula, which is renowned for it’s culture, emphasis on education and strip clubs. I had a great time mingling with some lovely, 3-breasted women while sipping on a pina colada as Bob introduced a group of ewoks to plinko. Fun Times!
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I'm really good at understanding when there's great chemistry. I'm never hesitant to make the first move.

Also, the last girl I dated said I was the funniest person she had ever met and that I've ruined other men for her in that department. She's god damn right!
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
That I'm not wearing any pants. Also, I'm Asian.

Or, it might be that I'm devilishly handsome and adorable and I'm really funny.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I'm just gonna do T.V. and movies, because that's all I feel like doing right now.

My favorite directors are Martin Scorsese and Christopher Nolan. I'm also a big fan of Tarantino, Spielberg, and Woody Allen. I also think James Cameron is grossly overrated. My ten favorite movies would have to be: Memento, L.A. Confidential, The Big Lebowski(If you've never seen or don't like Lebowski, neither me nor anyone else on this planet has any use for you.), The Departed, The Dark Knight, Taxi Driver, Annie Hall, Silver Linings Playbook, The Empire Strikes Back, 50/50 and Pulp Fiction.

T.V.: Breaking Bad(the greatest show ever to air on television), Boardwalk Empire, 30 Rock, Parks and Recreation, Person of Interest, The Daily Show, Colbert Report, Conan, Curb Your Enthusiasm(Larry David is my hero!), Girls(Yeah, I watch Girls. Marnie sucks!), Seinfeld, Arrested Development and The Larry Sanders Show. There are probably others that I am not thinking of right now.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Doing something that most likely involves the consumption of alcohol.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm Batman.

Also, my Myers-Brigg type is INTP.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 21–40
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You enjoy a man who can make you laugh and are turned on by intelligence.

I should point out that I don't have the capacity to be nice to people I find to be stupid/unintelligent. For example, if you have a picture of you with your kid on a dating profile, I'm not not messaging you because you have a kid. I'm not messaging you because you're an idiot.

I appreciate good grammar, so please know the difference between your/you're, there/their/they're and then/than.

I'm also not above being attracted to someone for superficial reasons.