Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


25 M Brooklyn, NY

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 18–27
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 12:09pm
Asian, Middle Eastern
5′ 11″ (1.81m)
Body Type
Strictly other
Graduated from university
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Mostly non-monogamous
English (Fluently), Chinese (Fluently), Arabic (Okay)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Right off the bat, I am a professional gigolo by day, bartender and standup comedian. I am not "your partner in crime," or your boyfriend or husband. I am your lover. My life spent trawling the cold streets of New York, comforting older women with my words and my hands has led me to the point where I am so tired of how just women want to use me for sex. So I am looking for someone who wants to talk and hang out and be friends.

Damn, what a giant load of horseshit I just wrote. Are you still paying attention? It's not all horseshit, there's some bullshit in there too. So some of that is true...maybe

One of my friends described me as a "manic pixie guy." I have no idea what that means, but I intend to be as manic as possibly. Pixies welcome too.

What is my life about? Absurdity, camels, a cold oatmeal porter or stout, and occasionally, a falafel sandwich from Mamoun's. That's a sentence fragment?

Go fuck yourself. :)
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Like Edmond Dantes in the Count of Monte Cristo, I have been imprisoned for years and years. My crime is stealing passion. My prison is this gilded, cold, steel desk, and my cangue this damned denim tie.

But I'm planning my escape, running off to find fortune and eat from the fruits of love. My real passion is writing, comedy, and standup.

Yeah, maybe it will be hard, this path I've chosen. But I'm gonna do it, naysayers be fucked.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
-having fun wherever I am.
-making a quesedilla that will have you singing.
-making Turkish coffee.
-crafting nonsensical, non-sequitur conversations between strangers in a distance.
-genuine compliments that make people feel appreciated.
-avoiding boring people.
-writing the character for 'love' in Chinese in the traditional style.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
There are constellations up and down my neck.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Freedom of expression
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
How big is the universe? How did the world begin? What is the best breakfast combination possible? The answer of course, is 42.

I fantasize about my retirement: opening and managing a comedy club in Brooklyn.

Reincarnation. I'm the reincarnation of a king long gone. Why does reincarnation have to be tomorrow or supernatural? Why not reincarnate who you are several times in a lifetime?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Actually most Friday nights I am at the Meatpacking District, sitting on an inflatable couch surrounded by pretty lights. I am a professional conversationalist actually (minus pay). Come say hi! You can even wear a little black dress if you like, although there's a good chance I'll be scruffy. I sometimes get up and grab a beer for like 20 minutes with a stranger I just met, and come right back.

Oh I am dead serious by the way.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
When I was six years old, I was a notorious for setting off fireworks, selling bad lemonade, and climbing trees.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Are you an active reader? Are you brave? Are you passionate? Are you, are you, are you. Are you even there?

Do you have the guts to chuck away this damned meat market app filled with resume dating bullshit and actually take a risk, a real social risk to learn about someone? To organically learn about their interests?

Yes sex, but before and after that, what? We can have it be humble bookends made of cardboard, or (if we use a sandwich analogy) homemade ciabatta bread, toasted. I know you think most dudes just want wonderbread, but I've eaten my fill. Lets eat a baugette. An everything bagel. The meat is only as good as the bread, darling. Let's elevate the conversation.