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61 Northampton, PA Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 40–65
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Today – 8:26am
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body Type
A little extra
Strictly other
Atheism, and laughing about it
Libra, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from university
Sales / Marketing
Has kids, but doesn’t want more
Has cats
English (Fluently)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm your Atypical Older Guy - ZERO interest in pro sports, cigars, scotch, golf, automotiphallic chrome, La-Z-Boy furniture, gold chains, wearing socks with sandals, or owning and driving a Buick that seats fourteen while wearing a dopey hat and leaving the blinker on for at least ten miles.

Yeah, I may be older... but I'm not THAT flavor of "older."

Vital stats:
> I work near Valley Forge, commute there from the Lehigh Valley, and have sons who live on Long Island, so my availability-territory isn't limited to just where I live; it's more of a broad swath of the eastern seaboard and inland a while. In other words: I may not live down the block, but I already drive a bunch, so location is somewhat irrelevant (though your mileage may vary -- literally). And FWIW, moving closer to Philadelphia is under serious consideration; my scenic mostly-rural commute is lovely and relaxing, but the daily epic journey is silly... and let's not even get into the sheer joy it is in winter weather.
> Wife 1.0: after eight years of on/off relationships, we finally married when we were 34... and I was widowed by age 35. I married her knowing she was ill; we had high hopes she'd beat the disease. However, the disease had other plans and took her out before we made it to one anniversary. That experience reshaped me in more ways than I can enumerate here.
> Wife 2.0: after 14+ years of relationship and 11+ years of marriage, she moved out (I was 49); it's a long story as to why, featuring two people who grew distant and the appearance in her life of Mr. Catalyst. I played single dad to our school-age sons for the next two years; at that point, we moved them to her place, primarily for a better educational experience. We divorced four years later (her idea and expense). Now, we're better friends than we were a decade ago, respect each other, and can even joke about our shared past.
> Those two now-adult sons are amazing young men, and I love 'em more than mere words can explain (though I try).
> Having two sons means I don't have much cash to play with, let alone survive. Child support, health coverage for them plus me, and both in college eats income like a starving dog who's found the kibble stash. By next year I may be negotiating with the cat for which one of us gets the first bite of her supper (though I have the advantage of opposable thumbs and superior skills with a can opener).
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
"Doing with my life..." - well, currently, I'd define it as "working to live while inhabiting a soul-sucking corporate cube farm west of Philadelphia." In a non-existent parallel universe, I'm making a living off writing and music.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
writing, music (listening intently to others', and making some of my own), breathing, witty repartee, petting my cat (apparently; she seems to like it), lovemaking, sarcasm, sensuality, empathy, heavy petting, open-heartedness, mild bondage, cursing at my computer, surprises, and wishing I was either taller or thinner.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Probably, it's my longish hair. I can sense others' reactions: "I mean, WTF is with that dude having long hair like that as HIS age?! How inappropriate! Obviously, he's in denial, refuses to act his age, and willfully exploits the fact that Nature's been kind and pretty much left his full head of hair the hell alone (including leaving the color mostly intact). The nerve of some people!!" I do cut it now and again (see photos), usually when I grow tired of coping with the mane. However, I don't do it often; blame my aging-hippie chromosome that prefers long hair, and the fact that I still can get away with it, thank you.

Might also be my full beard. Years ago, when showing off new-baby photos of my first born, a co-worker asked if my son had my chin; I replied that it was entirely possible, but I couldn't be sure since I hadn't seen the damn thing since 1978. That long ago year marked the first time I'd shaved off all my facial hair since it deigned to show up on my boyish teenage face. It also was the LAST time I shaved off all my facial hair, because after two weeks of daily bouts with a razor I decided shaving one's face was almost as pointless as the invention of the electric can opener.

Oh... and maybe my blue eyes. Allegedly, they twinkle when I'm putting you on. Caveat emptor.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Favorite music: impossible to sum up in a text box this size. Broad swaths: rock (progressive, especially), jazz (NOT SMOOTH JAZZ; it's suitable only for elevators and public toilets), instrumental bluegrass, classical (though not keen on 19th century romantics or most opera), some "new age" (though let's not get too navel-gazey, 'k?), and maybe even some pop that may surprise you (hell, it might even surprise me). Personal "A-list": Peter Gabriel, Steven Wilson (w/ or w/o Porcupine Tree), Ralph Towner (w/ or w/o Oregon), King Crimson, Michael Hedges, Mark Isham.

Favorite foods: non-boring. Indian, Thai, Vietnamese, Ethiopian, Spanish, Mexican, Indonesian, Turkish, Japanese, Chinese, Cajun, Greek, and occasionally even some "nouvelle American" will do. Diner fare is suitable only when everything else is closed; fast food is suitable only when everything else is closed and I'm desperate.

Favorite books: ones with words, unless it's a collection of visual images. Shocker: I like to write, but I'm not much of a book reader. Apologies (if necessary).

Favorite movies: ones that challenge me to think or inspire me to laugh (or both). I'll watch most anything if asked, though not explicit horror (I'll take macabre over mayhem any day) or really awful animation. And I am indeed a guy, but action movies don't get me hard.

Favorite "shows": dear OkCupidistas, do you mean TV? If so, here's the deal: I own a television, and it's connected only to my BluRay. I don't have cable; if there's something I'd really like to watch, I'll go try to find it online. When I did bother with cable, former faves included Rachel Maddow, The Daily Show, Colbert, Six Feet Under, Monk, Countdown with Keith Olbermann; and I can get sucked into a show or series if I find it interesting... an adjective which excludes all reality TV, 99% of sitcoms, and all prison shows.

... but if shows means "theatrical performances," I like most plays (everything from Shakespeare to absurdist), some musicals (mostly Sondheim works), and many types of dance, particularly modern dance.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Okay, I'm omitting obvious answers like carbon, oxygen and the rest of the Periodic Table of Elements, essential nutrients, water, lavatories, a heartbeat and gravity. We laughed, it was fun, let's move on.

My sons.
Expressive language (written or spoken).
Sensual pleasures.
Light and shadow.

Well... coffee, margaritas, good red wine, real champagne, and beer could have made the list, too, though more likely they'd fall under the "essential nutrients" category noted above.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
women, sensuality, music, social and political outrage, light, color, sex, the world's troubles, words, ideas, what I'll next be writing about, our quirky human race, where can I get a decent cup of coffee at this hour, and seriously, just what on earth is my downstairs neighbor cooking that smells like boiled gym shorts and when is she leaving her apartment so I can air out the joint and crank the music the hell UP.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
pleased that I survived another week with minimal loss of soul at the cube farm. I have no "Friday night ritual," aside from feed the cat, prepare/consume an adult beverage, and exercise my mind, wit and digits (usually via oddball comments on Facebook, or just writing in general).
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Well, there was the time that I... um... er... no, I'd better not. Okay, how about the night that I... um... no, never mind. It's inexplicable. What was I thinking??

But once we're better acquainted, I might tell you. Or demonstrate. Or ask if you'd be willing to... er... no, I'd better not.

...just yet.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.'d like to spend some time around someone who's genuine, honest, friendly, libidinous, sensitive, eccentric, and unique. Bonus points if you want to meet. Additional bonus points if you bring handcuffs and not a lot of baggage.