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40 Silver Spring, MD Woman


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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 33-50
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Nov 1
Seeing Someone
Relationship Type
5' 4" (1.63m)
Body Type
Post grad
Doesn’t have kids and doesn’t want them
English (Fluently)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
9/9/15: I'm still kind of taking a break, but I'm just starting to regain interest in connecting with new people. I'll be honest & say my threshold is set pretty high right now due to limited free time. But in theory I should start answering messages again. I say "in theory" because after catching up on my messages just now, I can say that a lot of you obviously aren't reading my list of how not to message me.

Note: I just wanted to say that I fall behind on responding to messages really easily. It may take up to a couple weeks for me to reply.

Yes, I have face pics, but I'm selective about sending them.

I am non-monogamous and do have relationships of various types and intensities already in my life. Monogamy is 95% off the table for me; if it's 100% necessary for you, then we're not compatible for dating. Compromise is possible, but if we have to start in a place where I have to do all the compromising, that creates a whole other set of issues. Feel free to message me for potential friendship.

I am looking for new people in my life, but it's not my life's focus. I have a great deal of love, commitment and affection in my chosen family; I'm not filling a void, and I'm not in a hurry. I don't do the online chat thing much if at all, so if I'm interested, I'm much more likely to try to find a time to meet you for coffee or a drink.

OkCupid keeps matching me with people I already know, so I do feel like it's system must work.

Note: I am interested in casual sex, but I took it off my list of "looking for" because too many people are clearly just writing to everyone who has that listed.

Just because I am interested in casual sex does not mean I am indiscriminate. I still want to know something about you. Being interested in casual sex is not enough of a common interest to get me interested in you. I have to actually like you enough to have sex with you, so say something interesting.

Being interested in casual sex also does not mean I am *not* interested in anything else.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
A lot. Things are pretty busy right now.

Work, family (biological & chosen), fun, and more work.

I'm a big nerd: comic books, documentaries, Star Trek, etc. except I'm not much of a gamer.

I write a lot.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Apparently, my smile... which you can't see here.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Off the top of my head..

Books: The Hunger Games, Beloved
Movies: The Avengers, Reservoir Dogs, Clue
Shows: Anything by Joss Whedon or Aaron Sorkin (well, almost anything. I've fallen behind on all the recent stuff. ) Avatar: The Last Airbender
Music: Guster, The Police, Adele, Ben Folds Five, Janelle Monae
Food: Indian, Mexican, Italian, Greek
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Based on my mood at the moment:

My phone. (Because it is how I find everything.)
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
My partners.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Hanging out with my friends, having a play date, or at a party.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're kinky, queer, and/or poly and looking to expand your social circle... and have something to say. Making an effort on grammar, spelling and punctuation is also appreciated.

If we have match & friend percentages of less than 80%, you also might want to tell me why you're writing (e.g. we have some particular interest in common or you liked my answer to a particular question.)

If your listed location is not local to me, I am not likely to answer you unless you are frequently in my area. So you should let me know if that's the case.

I hate that I feel compelled to put a series of disclaimers on my profile, but I just waded through a crapton of sucky messages, so here goes:
*One word messages - deleted.
*Messages only containing an emoticon - deleted.
*Messages that call me kitten, princess, or any other cutsey nickname without us having had any conversation - probably deleted.
*Messages that say nothing except how I fit a particular fetish of yours - deleted.
*Messages containing the word Nubian - promptly deleted
*Messages leading with "I've never had sex with a black girl" - definitely deleted.
*Messages written as though someone is charging you per punctuation mark - not necessarily deleted, but gets serious eye rolls.
*Messages written as though someone is paying you per punctuation mark - see above.
*Messages from people not local to me or with lower than an 80% match rate, with no information about why I should ignore those facts - probably deleted.
*Messages about how you're in town for the weekend and would like to hook up - not necessarily deleted, but probably.

Also, I am not a submissive. Seriously, stop asking. Top-leaning switch, if you must know.