A caustic mix of insomnia and procrastination has caused me to actually write something in this little and seemingly insignificant array of bytes, cleverly concealed to match human perception. The previous placeholder perhaps was insufficient, and hubris is almost always not well-rewarded; the hopes that the inquisitive types may research a little further should their interests be piqued is not always to be expected (or perhaps it's simply that I'm not awesome enough for such desires -- ouch, my ego). But of course, I think I give their consciousness... or perhaps their willpower too much credit.

So, anyway, that first paragraph has probably scared off a large majority of people. I'll let you be the judge of whether it was intentional or not. :)

Despite my ability on conveying myself through language, I still struggle to define myself properly. It's not necessarily because I don't know how to, but because I don't typically see or know a lot of people who are like me -- having a lack of references to work with makes the definition that much harder. The best entity for that would be you, provided you have sufficient analytical skills.

I hate using the words 'introvert' vs. 'extrovert'. I do what I want and pretend that I'm not too narcissistic, despite the fact that other people make me feel that way simply by observing them in their natural habitats.

...I kid. But I do tend to have a somewhat furtive attitude and demeanor, which spawns from [a healthy dose of] cynicism. Society usually stretches this cynicism and multiplies it unnecessarily. I like listening and reading people's views, as I enjoy seeing how other people deal with 42. Regardless of this, sociologically I just want to have fun. :3 It's a bit of a paradox, methinks.

I have immense respect for people who've developed a set of ethics on their own, and not used too many external references. After all, everything is dynamic to some extent and not static. It doesn't quite matter if they're "right" or "wrong", as long as you're not completely obnoxious and your mind still has some liberty and is not governed by the cold iron grips of authoritarianism. Wittiness of all kinds makes me smile uncontrollably, and anti-social wittiness makes me grin like a bad anime character. Independence and the ability to have control over our genetic pre-programming are also admirable traits.

I adore nerds. (Real ones, not 'geek-chic'. Barf.) And Reddit.

Jag är en bögapa med byxor.

I am a narwhal, a walrus, and a bacon.

I design, code, and research video games on several platforms. I completed my game development degree and am currently considering selling my soul to EA Games. I also write a lot and consider myself a faux-columnist-slash-gaming-journalist-renegade *breathes*. It's not just a profession, but a passion (but that's not to say I don't have other passions, but giving away everything is just lame).

But when I'm not doing that, I'm being awesome and using my washboard abs as a trampoline. My current record is jumping over a medieval castle somewhere in Moldova. I was able to replicate this feat in The Elder Scrolls: Morrowind, but unfortunately, my avatar was completely naked.

I left my flair[sic] in my other pants.

Jag äter en häst och dans.

Pretending to be as awesome as Richard Feynman.

Was there anything he wasn't good at? Other than not being very good at being shit at stuff?

But seriously, I consider myself skilled at... a lot of things, and it'd sound horribly toolish if I listed them all like this is some kind of resumé. Yuck.

Jag är väldigt bra på att imitera en stolpe.

They don't. I'm a ninja.

If they somehow do
I blind them with some haiku
Hmm. I am hungry.

Min katt gillar att resa med ljusets hastighet.

Dreaded lists. I'll humour you this one time, but unlike everyone else I'll actually list my favourites; not a bunch of stuff I might like in a mediocre fashion. Why do people do that? Big lists smell like cheese.

Books: Isaac Asimov, Douglas Adams, Frank Herbert, George Orwell, H. P. Lovecraft, J. R. R. Tolkien.

The stories behind Starcraft and Bioshock. They're not books -- but the stories were better than any book could give. Other, extremely important names to subtlety salute: Dawkins, Feynman, Sagan.

Movies: Amelie, In Bruges, Star Trek 8: First Contact.
Series: Red Dwarf, Big Bang Theory (or more precisely: Sheldon Cooper), Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek: Voyager, Dexter. I have ran out of Star Trek to watch so I've started to watch the original series. D:

I think idolising movie stars is retarded, however, having said that I think Patrick Stewart is a god.

Music: Yann Tiersen (Amelie OST, Goodbye Lenin OST), Tomas Dvorak (Machinarium OST), Rob King/Paul Romero (Heroes of Might and Magic OST), Jeremy Soule Total Annihilation OST, Venetian Snares (Rossz Csillag Alatt Született), all the works of Erik Satie and Philip Glass. You may notice a pattern here. I'm ambivalent about listing my favourite classical pieces because whenever I see someone else do it I think of a dirty hipster with a mac on a unicycle at a Starbucks. If you can agree that I'm not that: Chopin's Nocturne op. 9 no. 2, Beethoven's Symphony 7 Allegretto Movement 2, Samuel Barber's Adagio for Strings.

I enjoy most melodic metal, modern classical, and electronica that isn't drugs-induced. If it's not obvious (and it probably isn't unless you recognised half the titles above), I thoroughly enjoy good video game music. This includes 8bit/chiptunes as well (of which I also write a bit). I can play some stuff on piano, and I write music with trackers (I'll be impressed if you know what a tracker is without Wikipediaing it, btw). Feel free to request my songs if you wish.

This section is getting really big and listing the games I adore (such as Star Control 2, Dune 2, Quest for Glory, Morrowind, Mass Effect, The Longest Journey, Golden Axe, Masters of Orion 2, Civilization 5, Minecraft, Theme Hospital, Hydorah, Red Alert, Wacky Wheels, Tyrian, Raptor, TIE Fighter, Xwing Alliance, The Secret of Monkey Island, Day of the Tentacle, Stryker, Shadow Warrior, Sim City 2000, Portal, Plants vs Zombies, Painkiller, One Must Fall, Dungeon Keeper 2, New Vegas, Dragon Age, Death Rally, Commander Keen, Captain Comic, Carmageddon, Alley Cat, Braid, and the games listed under favourite music) would add a few more novels to it. Suffice it to say, I've played a lot of games.

Mmm... food.

I almost forgot to mention that George Carlin is (was, but I refuse to believe he's dead) the embodiment of both comedy and humanity.

Detta är verkligen en utmaning min förmåga på svenska.

"If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe."

An abstract question gets an abstract answer.

Life;
Purpose;
Ability.

Jag är uttråkad.

What enables sentience? What is it, really, that makes the distinction of frequency of a simple electromagnetic wave into red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, violet?

Is that my scuba mask in the oven?

Procrastination. Guys with huge beards demand respect and authority. Techno Viking. The data transfer of one ejaculation is about 50000x the storage capacity of my computer. I have a headache. I wonder what it'd be like to be Q. Why do so many people suck at math?

Snopp.

Höhöhö.

Making arbitrary actions for an arbitrary day.

I'm not one of those people who have the mindset of: hey, it's the end of the week, that means I have to do something different because I hate the monotomy of my life.

Planning leisure is boring; it should be unexpected; fluid; an adventure. Not like a Borg drone.

I play a lot of games. When I'm not playing games, I'm eating children.

Äta ost.

My first word was 'enter'. As in, the key on the keyboard.

I'm a pirate and the only thing I liked about Arrested Development was Buster when he lost his hand.

I like cheese.

Skrikar.

You're at least moderately adept at English if it's your first language.

You're not silly and think I'm 'intimidating'. I realise my writing style might convey that, but really... I love talking to people about anything, as long as you're not a tool. :) It actually surprises me how anti-social some people here are, I mean, I'd reply to someone even if I thought they were retarded -- to ridicule them about their monobrow, of course, but still.

You have a sense for irony and realise that I, like most people who are actually sentient, engage in a tongue-in-cheek attitude when writing things like these, because it's one of the only ways to not make yourself look like a douche.

You accidentally the whole thing.

Du tycker skägg är dumma.