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27 F Easthampton, MA

My Details

Last Online
Today – 3:30pm
5′ 4″ (1.63m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Other, and laughing about it
Pisces, and it’s fun to think about
Dropped out of university
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Strictly monogamous
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Likes dogs and has cats
English (Fluently)

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My self-summary

Jesus, if you can't read the whole thing, I'm NOT FUCKING INTERESTED.




I am:

- a native Californian who moved to New England because she enjoys affordable healthcare, civil rights for all, and lobstah
- a card-carrying, dice-wielding nerd
- grumpy
- "a disaster" (see below)
- an introvert who enjoys being around people
- an Apple fangirl since the Apple ][e
- battling depression via therapy and better living through chemistry
- a Trekkie
- a staunch supporter of medical cannabis
- Scottish/Dutch
- 'spectrum,' which is the nice way of saying mildly Aspie
- an offensive driver (re: Masshole)
- a believer in ghosts and other preternatural things
- a writer of fanfiction
- a Cat Whisperer
- kind
- an avid reader
- a lifelong Democrat
- prone to bouts of sadness, self-doubt and ennui
- not as successful in life as I'd hoped to be by this age
- a car singer
- awkward as fuck
- the girl who waited
- the girl who is tired of waiting
- impossible
- mighty

Basically I am really really rad.
What I’m doing with my life
I am looking for someone to share in an adventure that I am arranging, and it's very difficult to find anyone.

I sling popcorn at a not-for-profit art-house cinema. Sometimes, I give tours of haunted mansions.

When I am not doing these things, I:

- dick around on the internet
- have long and detailed conversations with my cat
- have intense feelings about fictional characters
- write stories
- read (books, stuff online, unmodified Sumerian, whatever)
- drive. Anywhere.

When I grow up I want to be a librarian, a writer, and a velociraptor.
I’m really good at
writing compelling little stories; getting lost on purpose; taking pictures; singing in the car; exploring new worlds and new civilizations; playing Scrabble; making scrambled eggs; not being a dick; discussing dicks and their many uses; taking care of my awesome cat.
The first things people usually notice about me
My fabulous legs (seasonal), my big grey eyes, my lack of tentacles.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I read stuff by Neil Gaiman and Roald Dahl and Armistead Maupin; I loved Harry Potter; To Kill a Mockingbird is my favorite book ever; The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is where I pull names for my animals; I thoroughly enjoyed The Hunger Games; I have an affinity for young adult novels and science fiction, as well as non-fiction history books, usually about ancient Britain or mythology.

Currently I am on a fanfiction binge, though I did just read Saga 1 & 2. LYINGGGGG.

Now reading Daughter of Smoke and Bone.

I love the Welcome To Night Vale podcast.

I read a lot of webcomics (conveniently my friends draw a lot of webcomics, how about that). Gunnerkrigg Court is incredible and I wish everybody would read it. Also, Questionable Content, Hark! A Vagrant, Bad Machinery, xkcd, Johnny Wanderer, Oglaf, TJ and Amal, Dresden Codak, and Girls With Slingshots, and Oh Joy, Sex Toy are all favorites.

(My friends and I quote Oglaf at each other during DnD. Sluuuuuuuuuuuuut.)

U2 is my favorite band, period. I once ran away from real life to follow them around on tour and I have seen them live more times than is considered sane. I also stan for the The Frames and I really dig that Luka Bloom fella. Other artists worth mentioning include the Decemberists, Queen, Florence and the Machine, film scores, Mumford and Sons, Of Monsters and Men, fun., and Marina and the Diamonds.

I also like frothy pop music, especially in the car. Ke$ha is my Patronus.


These are some awesome movies that I like: The Princess Bride, Labyrinth, LOTR, Howl's Moving Castle, Sherlock Holmes, Spirited Away, Iron Man, Captain America, Star Trek, Star Trek Into Darkness, WALL-E, How to Train Your Dragon, My Fair Lady, My Neighbor Totoro, Close Encounters of the Third Kind, The Avengers, Brave.

Most recently I have seen Kill Your Darlings, Tim's Vermeer, and Captain America: The Winter Soldier.

I have cable, and all I watch on it are nature shows and Jeopardy!. I download just about everything else that I watch, which is stuff like Doctor Who, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., the BBC's Sherlock, Sleepy Hollow, Supernatural, Firefly, and Teen Wolf. (It is a terrible show and I love it.)

I just started watching Brooklyn Nine Nine and I adore it.

I also watch any SF Giants game I can get my hands on. GO GIANTS. (I have no time for Dodgers fans.)

I also love Ghost Adventures because the Ghost Bros are like the best trio of paranormal-hunting douchebags. I swear they film every episode while completely fucked up. It's a magical show.

I live every week like it's Shark Week.

I eat like a caveman, very meat & potatoes. Please do not come between me and, for example, poutine. You will LOSE A HAND
The six things I could never do without
My cat, the internet, a car, a computer, brain medications, and the written word.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
- what I'd do if I won the lottery
- Dylan O'Brien's everything
- eating cheeseburgers
- the stories I'm not writing because my attention span is nonexis
- squirrel!
- money and how I never have any
- my cat
On a typical Friday night I am
contemplating the lights above the Arby's.

solving for y.

competing in the Iditarod.


(Truth: possibly stoned, possibly playing D&D, possibly looking at cat gifs on Tumblr. #yolo)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
This isn't very private, but I am not an active person. At all. I don't ride a bike, or kayak, or rock-climb, or jog, or go to a gym, or whatever parkour is, or any of that. Some of it's because I have health issues that wear me out easily, and some of it is that I just. don't. like. it.

This doesn't mean YOU can't like it. And it doesn't mean I won't go on a (short) hike with you, or a walk, or maybe take up the treadmill next to yours at the gym. But don't expect me to follow you up any mountains. I'll be down in the car, with the AC on, guarding the snacks and Tweeting about hot dudes.
I’m looking for
  • Guys who like girls
  • Ages 27–40
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
you can do better than this articulate missive from user kevinddeeaann:

"Well Hun i was reading your profile and well it seems to be you sound like some one that's demanding a lot for just a email back and forth i am not stupid yes i did read your stuff why should i do what you ask is this a test i have not been in school since 91 so really wow look i would like to talk to you but if i have to do a test to do so no thanks anyway single father of one raised him by myself for the last 7 years and did a good job with out your help go figure i don't want to sound rude i think you are a good women but trying to hard listen just get back to me so we can talk OK i hope to here from you and i am sorry if i did not spell something the wright way"

or THIS guy, 54-year-old user 'freesolo':

"Dear Astu-Dying-Inger,
How did you get this far? Does the sertraline and cannabis make a good combo?
I am sure glad I am not young enough for you to consider dating me. You are a disaster.

I get the NICEST messages, don't I? I'm such a lucky girl. Much special. Very douchebags.