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41 Seattle, WA Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 27–66
  • Near me
  • For short-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
6′ 2″ (1.88m)
Body Type
Pisces, and it’s fun to think about
Dropped out of Ph.D program
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Has kids
Has cats
English (Fluently), C++ (Okay), Other (Fluently)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
In some ways this says it all:
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm a parent. I used to have two small children, now I have two medium-sized children, and eventually I expect to have to large children, who will then, presumably, become adults.

I'm a husband. I have two wives, you can find them here as jeliza and soeursansmerci. They know I'm here. I know they're here. They are awesome people.

I have a job writing code for a large Internet company. I'm good at it, and I enjoy it, but it's no longer the center of my life. It allows me to take care of myself, my immediate family, and sometimes other people, and leave a little left over for fun; and it leaves me with enough time and energy to be a good parent and a good husband and pursue some other interests.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Writing shitty first drafts. Sometimes parenting. Usually software engineering - including both the parts where I have to write code, and the parts where I have to decide what code to write.

I'm still a reasonably competent pianist, but nowhere near as good as I used to be.

I used to be an academic, studying cognitive psychology, neuroscience, and language. That still informs a lot of my thinking.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
If they're noticing me visually, my hair. It is somewhat long, and very curly, and reddish-brown.

Otherwise, it could be my laugh. I sometimes have a very *large*, loud laugh, particularly if you catch me by surprise.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books are pretty central to my life, and were even moreso as I was growing up. I read a lot of speculative fiction, a bit of mystery, many books on writing, and the occasional non-fiction science book. SF and fantasy are what I grew up on, and still where I spend the majority of my time. I wish N.K. Jemisin, Lois McMaster Bujold, Seanan McGuire and Jim C Hines would WRITE FASTER DAMMIT. (Although, uh, if Seanan McGuire wrote faster that might violate some laws of physics and result in the destruction of the universe. So maybe not.)

Movies and TV shows I use mostly for escape. I'm partial to Leverage and Castle. My wives have slowly gotten me to see that a good movie can be a transcendent piece of artwork just as much as a good book, but that's still not what I look to film for. I do really enjoy live theater and am making an effort to see more of it.

I'm partial to certain varieties of electronica and folk music, and I just came off a five-year long hiatus on folk (which is all I was listening to for a while before that.) I wish I were performing music right now, but I'm not making that a priority. I love 'classical' music, particularly early Romantic.

My favorite foods are Indian, Thai and Italian, but I'm flexible. I *love* spicy food, but my spouses are not as fond of it as I, so I'm perfectly willing to eat mild stuff as well. If I don't eat something really spicy at least once a month, though, I tend to get grumpy.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
What comes to mind beyond the obvious, in no particular order:

A healthy dose of mad science, which is usually really mad engineering.

Periodically laughing so much that there are muscles in my face that hurt.

Live performance.

Very spicy food.

Puzzles (in the general sense, not the jigsaw sense.)

Fictional reification of my naive delusions that the world will develop as it should.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Parenting, which in turn makes me think about ethics, anthropology, and feminism. Did I mention I'm a feminist? I'm a feminist. Given my family and friends I feel like my choices are feminist or traitor. To quote, it's a pretty easy choice if you ask me.

Writing, including plot, characterization, setting, theme, description, word choice... I often think about writing while I'm reading, although I find that the books I'd most like to learn from are the ones that catch me up in the words or the story so it's hard to pay attention enough to learn.

Software engineering, what with that being my job and all.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I want to make my own transcranial magnetic stimulation rig so I can create temporary lesions in my brain. I can't quite understand why more people *don't* want to do this.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Did you know you can't *not* put dates in the "Ages" boxes in the "I'm looking for" section? If you try to leave them blank, it says you're looking for people 18-19.

Someone told me that if I put "NSPP" here it would bring all the girls to my yard. I'm poly but that isn't enough of a reason to message me - though if it is a reason not to message me, I'm glad I mentioned it. I'm nerdy and geeky in all the best ways (well, several of them), if you are as well we'll probably enjoy each other's company for at least a few hours.

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