Much of my life has been spent seeking wisdom, answers, and awareness, sometimes haphazardly, sometimes successfully. I'm a philosopher and a dreamer to the core. Sometimes it gets me in trouble, often it gets me nowhere, but from time to time it pushes me beyond the barriers of ordinary consciousness and ego, and propels me into a space hardly describable in words. It's profoundly beautiful, illuminating, and liberating.
As a dreamer and a thinker, I naturally do not feel entirely at home fastened to society's flagpole. I'd say that I'm a free thinker, but these days I hardly even know what true freedom is. Certainly I'm warped by culture, and often my thoughts feel outside of my control! I think true freedom is a state of mind.
I used to take a somewhat bitter slant towards things, which has changed for the most part, but it can still slip through sometimes. The world can be a very cruel place, and that solemn truth is a weight that I will always carry. Our species has yet to emerge from the dark ages.
I've always had a susceptibility to depression and anxiety; I have struggled with both for most of my life. I'm a little bit OCD and more than a little bit of a hypochondriac (both improving). Lately I've been working really hard to overcome them. With enough meditation and exercise, they usually drop to a minimum.
I tend to overthink things.
I am a slacker artist. I like to draw (even though I don't know how), love to write (you know, in my head) and I especially love to write music (let's just say I've never taken any formal lessons). The creative process is extremely gratifying and exciting to me, and I'm always striving to improve my creative abilities.
I love listening to music, playing video games, and watching movies. Maybe a little too much. I'm addicted! I'm especially fascinated with video games, to the degree that I'm considering a career in game design. I definitely have an escapist streak in me. I'd choose a night at the films with a friend or two (or yes, completely alone) over a crowded party any day of the week.
I'm a very laid back, introverted person. I can also be quite empathetic and compassionate when I want to be. Because I'm an introvert, I need alone time pretty much every day to "recharge". It's simply how I am. For me, the inner world is just as fascinating and fulfilling as the outer one.
I'm no fan of small talk. I prefer honest, personal conversations. I'm always trying to understand the other side of the issue. It takes a great deal of courage to admit defeat, and I have immense respect for people who can. I like to debate (even with myself), and I find it most satisfying when both participants maintain a calm, open approach towards the subject with the goal of attaining a greater understanding of the issue at hand.
I'm an INFJ/INFP, leaning more towards the former, for those of you who are into that sort of thing. I am, probably a bit too much. We mustn't define things too rigidly, especially elements of the mind.
As you've probably deduced by now, I'm deeply interested in the mind and the nature of consciousness. I consider myself a psychonaut.
I'm totally obsessed with the paranormal, from synchronicity to psychokinesis. I am damn near convinced that we humans are capable of much more than is readily apparent. My dream is to conduct research within the field of parapsychology.
I like to run, but I can't go very far XD
That's enough for now, right? I think I've done a finely mediocre job of this, if I do say so myself.
Yes, I was drunk on kava kava when I wrote this :D