Okay, so like, let me first start off by saying that I'm totally
okay with the idea of dying alone. I mean, I've thought about it,
and at first I was all, "I don't really KNOW if I'm okay with
that?", but then I was all, "No, I am. That's totally fine. I'm
okay with that." So...I'm not on here looking for someone to die
with. That being said, let's say we meet up at some point and we're
driving somewhere, maybe to dinner or drinks or a comedy club or
something, and we're doing the whole semi-awkward small-talk
get-to-know-you thing -- you're like, "Sooo...how many OkCupid
dates have you been on so far?" and start to perspire as I tilt my
head and begin to deeply ponder the question; perhaps I even glance
down to my hands and start counting on my fingers, or mouthing
names to myself, etc. -- and all of a sudden there's a ton of brake
lights in the traffic ahead, and you turn to me and are all, "OH MY
GOD I'M FLOORING THE BRAKES AND NOTHING'S HAPPENING!!!", and I'm
all, "HOLY SHIT!!! 17 dates btdubbs...", then suddenly a Mack truck
comes out of NOWHERE and is all, *HOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNKKKKKKKKKKK*
with its ridonculously blinding lights, and we turn to each other
and are both like, "O_O .... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" and then it
just like, SLAMS us and we're both dead and stuff? If THAT happens,
I wouldn't be in Heaven going, "Damn it, I really was hoping to die
alone and not with that OkCupid girl." I mean, if it happens, it
happens, ya know? You should probably get your brakes looked at
though, cuz I'll be honest with you, that's NOT how I'm trying to
check out. You never know, maybe we'll fall madly in love and then
I'll go crazy and forget who you are, and we'll eventually peace
out spooning in some old fogies home Notebook style. Or spooning on
a floating bed aboard the Titanic as our room floods with freezing
water. Well, not THE Titanic, cuz like, that already happened...you
know what I mean. The point is, if your brakes fail and we die on
our first date we could be missing out on those other more romantic
options. But I really am okay with dying alone, so no
But anyways, here are some things about me:
-I like playing tennis. I started playing when I was like 7. Took
lessons, played in tournaments, school team, yada yada. I string my
own racquets too. I also played soccer.
-I inherited being a Lakers fan. You see this crazy team they have
this year? What can I say? I like ball sports.
-I taught myself how to play guitar in college. Supposedly I
learned how to play really fast, before Guitar Hero and Rocksmith
-My next project may be learning the ukulele.
Who can teach
-I think nerdy things like laser tag and go karts are fun. And
paintball too. Because you know, who doesn't like shooting people
up with little paintballs that go poof?
-Concerts are always awesome. My favorite was the Eagles at
I've been known to frequent classical ones as
well. The sound of strings warming up is quite nice. Rock, rap,
country, jazz, whatever. Just as long as it doesn't scream at me
-I like cooking my own food. It always tastes better when you make
it yourself. Who needs Burger King to have it your way?
-I'm a professional card player by definition so I've been
-I drive a stick and find it preferable to automatic. How else are
you going to stay awake in LA traffic?
There's more but in an effort to save your eyes I'll spare you.
Isn't that nice of me? Send me a message. :)