Nothing has entertained me more in the last few weeks, even though I know what I'm linking to below is a couple of years old.

This could even save your life.

How important is it for you to give expensive gifts on a regular basis when in a relationship?

• Very important.
• Somewhat important.
• Not at all important.

That expensive qualifier breaks this. I consider myself to normally be a "just because" gift-giver in relationships. But usually when I do give, it's of sentimental or meaningful value, and in some cases be something used to bond over. If it happens to have a higher price tag, that's just coincidental.

Currently I have this statement towards the bottom of my profile:

"While I'll talk to just about anybody, certain folks won't get very far with me conversation-wise, especially if you're reading my profile and already seeking to convert me to something I can never be."

In requesting review from people, I had a conversation with a friend that seemed to misinterpret the statement - she presumed that this read as me being wary of accepting of changes or personal redefinition. Actually, this process is something of a redefinition, but not one that's changing who I am - just a way of bringing the most appealing (or least unappealing) qualities to first impression level, when for the longest time I was used to keeping most of this detail buried.

But really, the statement, at least when I wrote it, reads as, "Entering into a relationship with me with the express intention of pressuring me towards taking up a set of hive mind values or -isms, whether that's religious, socio-political, dietary, or other, is not something I'm likely to reach any sort of agreement with."

Meaning I am my own thinker, and my sincerest hope is for you to be your own thinker as well, and this is the best path to a harmonious friendship and beyond with me. Of course, when it comes to an informed assistance in self-improvement, I'm open to many things.

Is there a better way to put this? I dunno. Probably.

Friends. Then one night, sex. Then...?

• Friends.
• Love.
• Angst.
• Bye.

Not really changing my previous answer of Friends, but inspired by someone else's cheeky and amusing answer of "More sex." - since the original author isn't around, would that fall more under Friends or Love? Just because in reality (at least when it hasn't fallen into Angst) I've seen it fall either way in equal amounts is all, depending on the situation.

And really, anybody answering "Bye" is just a crap dude/dudette - even in cases where further contact would damn a social circle, good friends are supposed to work through that stuff. Or at least that's the way I always thought - I could be completely wrong and therefore dumb.

Would you rather have more money or more freedom?

• More money
• More freedom

Tell me, OKC, do you mean personal freedom or sociopolitical Freedom? I see a small f there, so I assume the former. I have enough of this already right now, and the only thing that's preventing me from making decent use of it is finances. So in this case, the answer is pretty obvious.

When birds stand on power lines and don't get hurt, it's most likely because of:

• Good timing; they only land between calls
• Body materials that are insulated from current
• Not touching anything else at the same time
• They do get hurt; they just express it poorly

Look, I know what the REAL answer to this is, but the good timing answer was just too funny to resist.

Will you teach your children to believe in Santa?

• Yes
• No

I'd almost want to say No to this, but somehow it'll get to them before too long. So the question is, how do you handle it? Do you address the longstanding fable as if it's absolute fact? Or probably possibly folklore, that not everyone readily accepts? When you inevitably get busted by your insomnia-addled child while setting up toys a few years later, what do you do then? Do you admit the myth being just that? Or do you pile yet another filthy lie on top of your already established lie, by claiming Santa left the unassembled toys for you to take care of, as his busy delivery schedule would not let him stay and make sure things were ready in the morning?

Surely, this is a much bigger dilemma than parental sex education.

Do you have a problem with racist jokes?

• Yes
• No

Only in the sense of jokes that are clearly spiteful. I don't necessarily see anything wrong with "lol stereotypes" humor or even racial humor that goes a little bit for the jugular, even (and especially) in regards to my own race. If I did, Putney Swope wouldn't be my favorite movie. But I still think there's a line that can be crossed, and when people get into straight-faced slurs with their jokes, I do get a little (no, a lot) uncomfortable.