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beetnemesis

28 M Washington, DC

My Details

Last Online
Mar 22
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body Type
Diet
Smokes
No
Drinks
Often
Drugs
Sometimes
Religion
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Sign
Leo, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), French (Poorly), Thai (Poorly)

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My self-summary
Short version: From New York, went to college in Baltimore, lived in Thailand after graduation, then came down to DC because it turns out Long Island is short on cheap rental opportunities for 20-somethings.
What I’m doing with my life
Working my way through "How to Cook Everything" by Mark Bittman.

Being annoyed that DC is filled only with consultants, government workers and military while ignoring the fact that I am a consultant.

Wondering where a good place to play volleyball in Tenleytown is.

Staying up too late playing video games and downloading audiobooks.
I’m really good at
Reading. Volleyball. Video games. SCUBA diving. Cooking Thai food (well... coconut soup and curry, anyway). Staging inappropriate conversations for the benefit of strangers. Chicken fights (pool AND ocean). Referencing 90s television shows. Whack-A-Mole.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: Anything by Terry Pratchett, Douglas Adams, Brandon Sanderson, Neil Gaiman, or Alan Moore. Mists of Avalon, Snow Crash, America: The Book, Watchmen, How To Cook Anything

Movies: Gran Torino, Serenity, Aristocrats, The Big Chill, The Dark Knight, Charlie Chaplin's City Lights, Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog

TV: 30 Rock, Community, Louis, Arrested Development, Firefly, Dexter, American Dad, Top Chef, Archer

Food: Thai food; Sushi; Bratwurst; Southern-style Barbecue; Cheese!; Eggplant Parmesan; Homemade Fried Rice; "Cold Cheese" pizza that I only ever see in Huntington, NY. Bacon.
The six things I could never do without
-Books. Next time I leave the English-speaking world, I am buying or stealing a Kindle.

-A computer

-A sense of humor

-A sense of whimsy

-The feeling of a strong wind blowing into my face.

-Mighty Mango Naked Juice
I spend a lot of time thinking about
-How to bluff people into not challenging your made-up words in Scrabble

-If the spiritual aspects of my Thai massage training are bullshit or not

-Frisbees, good beers whose names I keep forgetting, the seemingly paradoxical fact that harsh restrictions on an artistic form can lead to the greatest expressions of creativity, Gnosticism, hot-wiring, inconvenient superpowers, flags, behavior mirroring, webcomics.
On a typical Friday night I am
-drinking at a party with some obscure theme like "pirate party on a hidden boat in Bushwick!"

-drinking either expensive beer or cheap wine. Or medium-priced liquor.

-trapping armchair linguists with the more obscure meanings of "affect and "effect."

-Playing "Marry, Fuck, Kill" with extra rules for past and future versions of people, fictional characters and Anthropomorphic Personifications
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
In college I had a TV show in which I gave a lap dance while dressed as the Hamburglar.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 18–31
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
You can make an xkcd reference, a margarita, or a well-timed dirty joke.