Hi! I'm Ben. I work in several local theaters and event centers as a bartender. I love the arts! In recent years, I have fallen in love with opera, and I go often. How do you look in a tux? How about a tuxspeedo? Really? Wow that's not easy to carry off. Well, keep reading sailor...

Just so you know, I have no interest in ambushing anyone with my real self on the first date, much less the fiftieth. My intent here is to be honest about myself so that your time and my time are not wasted.

First and foremost, I must say I am a transgender human being, a cross-dresser, not a transsexual. I wear women's clothing daily, and I think I have a pretty cute style. To me, drag is many things, a political statement, a style preference, a way of expressing my individuality, my dual nature, as well as my distaste for chest-beating macho douchebaggery, but the bottom line is simply this: it's who I am, who I've always been. I'm looking for someone who loves and celebrates this part of me.

Whatever I am wearing, I can be both masculine and feminine. I like musical theater, the color pink and the movie "Fame," but in many ways I am very much a "guy." Being a Gemini, I often embrace contradiction, but I can also be very logical, which is itself a contradiction. See what I mean?

I am involved in the labor and LGBT rights movement. My union is very active and feisty, so I will try to recruit you for something at some point!

I do not do hard drugs, but I smoke weed legally and regularly. I don't have to have it in the situation always, but I do it often. My purpose is to be honest, but I have been told by friends that if you say yes to the drug question people assume you're a crack-head.

I like nice people, and good manners are a plus, but that doesn't mean you have to be uptight. I use profanity often. I am looking for someone who is generally up-beat, loves to laugh (or roll your eyes) at silly jokes and who treats myself and everyone with dignity and respect. I am also looking for someone who can have fun without having to spend a bundle or go cliff diving or something. I love scrabble!

My usual diversions are playing video games and watching streaming video on Netflix! If you like gaming, that's hot. If you're not into it, I can do it on my own time. No one should ever have to compete with a machine for attention!

I am perfectly happy being single, so I have no intention of settling for someone who is not really right for me. That's why I'm here.

Trying to enjoy life while I am here

Making drinks, writing, customer service

I'm in drag (duh). After that, my laugh (it's pretty loud when at full force, so you will probably hear me before you see me) and my smile. I also have a nice pair of legs! ;)

Books: A People's History of the US, Guns Germs and Steel, If on a Winter's Night A Traveller, Ishmael, Dune, Gravitys Rainbow, Red mars, Illuminatus Trilogy, Pillars of the Earth, Molloy, Watership Down, Left Hand of Darkness, Song of Ice and Fire series, Love in the Time of Cholera, Alan Mendelsohn The Boy From Mars, The Sound and The Fury, Ulysses, The Sotweed Factor, The Name of the Rose, The Plague, Shogun, Hitchhiker's Guide, The Tunnel, Chaucer, Shakespeare, T.S. Eliot, ee cummings.

Movies: Edmond, Star Wars IV-VI, Rear Window, Akira, Cohen Brothers, Team America, Old School, Zoolander, The Mission, Goodfellas, Airplane!, American in Paris, Singing in the Rain.

TV: Family Guy, Lost, The Office, Dr Who, Black Adder, 30 rock, Little Brittain, Dexter, True Blood, Mad Men.

Music: Philip Glass, Robert Cray, Puccini, The Pixies, My Bloody Valentine, Dead can Dance, Tribe Called Quest, Biggie, Dead Prez, Mob Deep, Hendrix, Arcade Fire, Elvis Costello, Dillinja, Mary J. Blige, Bob Dylan, Coltrane, Nirvana, Silver Sun Pickups, Loxy, Verdi, Marvin gaye, Bill Withers, Abba, Black Star, Ella Fitzgerald, Roots, De la, Hank Williams, The Cure, Janelle Monae, Julie London, Madonna, Gaga, Dee-lite, Kruder and Dorfmeister, Diana Ross, Salt N Pepa, Prince, Isley Bros., P Funk, NWA, Diplo, Santo Gold, Living Legends, All booty music, Common, Kanye, Eminem, Pharcyde, Bad Brains, Beastie Boyz, George and Ira Gershwin, Badu, Outkast, Goody Mob, Journey, Billie Holiday, Santana, Earth Wind and Fire

Food: I love to cook, and I like feeding people. I like all kinds of food, but comfort food is closest to my heart (and stomach): stuff like mac n cheese, chicken pot pie etc. I cook a lot of soup. I also cook quiche often.

(not necessarily things) Books, Chocolate, My Dog, laughter, Music, Friends

the fact that I think too much

working- but sometimes afterwards I go dancing!

See above

You are not desperate, have good self-esteem and consider yourself a work in progress!