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41 M Portland, OR

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 7:40pm
5′ 10″ (1.78m)
Body Type
Graduated from university
Less than $20,000
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Has dogs

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My self-summary
Hi! I'm Ben. I am looking for open-minded men and women who appreciate a person who does not conform to gender stereotypes.

I love opera and go often to local performances. So how do you look in a tux? How about a tuxspeedo? Really? Wow that's not easy to carry off. Well, keep reading sailor...

Just so you know, I have no interest in ambushing anyone with my real self on the first date, much less the fiftieth. My intent here is to be honest about myself so that your time and my time are not wasted.

As I said, I am a gender non-conformist. I was born male but my appearance is feminine. I am not on hormones. To me, drag is many things: a political statement, a style preference, a way of expressing my individuality, my dual nature, as well as my distaste for chest-beating macho nonsense, but the bottom line is simply this: it's who I am, who I've always been. I'm looking for someone who loves and celebrates this part of me.

I am currently a bartender at the Performing Arts Center and an organizer for my labor union, UNITE HERE! We organize Hotel and other service workers. I am passionate about social justice, and very active in the local scene! I love rallies and demonstrations, and I firmly believe in the transforming power of collective action!!! Si Se Puede!

I do not do hard drugs, but I smoke weed legally and regularly. I don't have to have it in the situation always, but I do it often.

I am looking for someone who is generally up-beat, loves to laugh (or roll your eyes) at silly, often inappropriate (I can relate anything to sex or poo) jokes and who treats myself and everyone with dignity and respect. I am also looking for someone who can have fun without having to spend a bundle or go cliff diving or something. I love board games!

My usual diversions are playing video games and watching streaming video on Netflix! If you like gaming, that's hot. If you're not into it, I can do it on my own time. No one should ever have to compete with a machine for attention!

I am perfectly happy being single, so I have no intention of settling for someone who is not really right for me. That's why I'm here.
What I’m doing with my life
My goals:

Empower working people to resist corporate oppression.

Create a movement of poor and middle-class people to reclaim our Democracy.

Raise the consciousness of the world about Lesbian, Gay, Biesexual, and Transgender equality, one person at a time.

Reverse the often corrosive and toxic effects of religious belief on our society by encouraging people to question and examine their faith more closely.
I’m really good at
Making real connections with people, making people feel at ease about the fact that they are speaking to a man wearing a dress, public speaking, being a member of a team, building bridges between diverse groups, running meetings, turn-out for actions! I am also one of the best chant leaders in town!!!
The first things people usually notice about me
I'm in drag. After that, my laugh (goofy but endearing), my smile. I also have a nice pair of legs! ;) Work what you got Mama!
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: The God Delusion, A People's History of the US, Guns Germs and Steel, The Omnivore's Delight, If on a Winter's Night A Traveller, Ishmael, Dune, Gravitys Rainbow, Red mars, Illuminatus Trilogy, Pillars of the Earth, Molloy, Watership Down, Left Hand of Darkness, Song of Ice and Fire series, Love in the Time of Cholera, Alan Mendelsohn The Boy From Mars, The Sound and The Fury, Ulysses, The Sotweed Factor, The Name of the Rose, The Plague, Shogun, Hitchhiker's Guide, The Tunnel, Chaucer, Shakespeare, T.S. Eliot, ee cummings.

Movies: Edmond, Star Wars IV-VI, Rear Window, Akira, Cohen Brothers, Team America, Old School, Zoolander, The Mission, Goodfellas, Airplane!, American in Paris, Singing in the Rain, Super Size Me, Wizard of Oz.

TV: Family Guy, Lost, The Office, Dr Who, Black Adder, 30 rock, Little Brittain, Dexter, True Blood, Mad Men, Frasier, Twin Peaks, Parks and Rec, Red dwarf.

Music: Philip Glass, Robert Cray, Puccini, The Pixies, My Bloody Valentine, Dead can Dance, Tribe Called Quest, Biggie, Dead Prez, Mob Deep, Hendrix, Arcade Fire, Elvis Costello, Dillinja, Mary J. Blige, Bob Dylan, Coltrane, Nirvana, Silver Sun Pickups, Loxy, Verdi, Marvin gaye, Bill Withers, Abba, Black Star, Ella Fitzgerald, Roots, De la, Hank Williams, The Cure, Janelle Monae, Julie London, Madonna, Gaga, Dee-lite, Kruder and Dorfmeister, Diana Ross, Salt N Pepa, Prince, Isley Bros., P Funk, NWA, Diplo, Santo Gold, Living Legends, All booty music, Common, Kanye, Eminem, Pharcyde, Bad Brains, Beastie Boyz, George and Ira Gershwin, Badu, Outkast, Goody Mob, Journey, Billie Holiday, Santana, Earth Wind and Fire, Beyonce, Brittney Spears.

Food: I love to cook, and I like feeding people. I like all kinds of food, but comfort food is closest to my heart (and stomach): stuff like mac n cheese, chicken pot pie etc. I cook a lot of soup. I also cook quiche often.
The six things I could never do without
(not necessarily things) Books, Chocolate, My Dog, laughter, Music, Friends
I spend a lot of time thinking about
the fact that I think too much
On a typical Friday night I am
Working or sometimes dancing!
I’m looking for
  • Everybody
  • Ages 21–50
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
You are not desperate, have good self-esteem and consider yourself a work in progress!