[I'm not bisexual, I guess I should be slightly less random in my choice of random names in future, sorry].

On to the about me bit then...

I'm a professional musician - I earn a living doing what I want to do and have lots of free time in which to do lots of other stuff I also like to do.

I feel like I'm from a different time but very modern too.

I say things inside out as you can see.

I can unleash sarcastic wit or be quite silly if the mood takes me but more than likely will come across very polite and English.

And obviously I give away all I earn to charity and frequently help dying animals... :)

I perform, teach, arrange and record music for a living, as in, actual musical instruments. Yes that's the one, but starting other businesses and thinking about the future too.

There's also cooking, my friends, watching movies, iplayer, going out, doing and seeing art, buying clothes, reading up on stuff on the internet, walking and cycling that take up the rest of my time.

- Procrastinating (spending time browsing on here is a fantastic contributor to this)
- Cooking
- Walking
- Looking after people I care about
- Making the best of a situation
- Finding the good in people
- Being direct about my feelings/thoughts
- (And if the mood takes me): being deliberately obtuse, using ornate language and subverting

That most other guys are taller.

I'm very chatty. I'll ask you a lot of questions because I'm genuinely interested in what you have to say, I'm not taking the piss. You'll get used to it.

I say "bath", "grass" and "class", not "baaath", "graaahs" and "claaahs". Although I was born in the North of England, I happen to be educated.

...Long bit coming up, you might want to skip it...

Books- It begins and ends with Dickens, oh, and non-fiction, but there's Tommy Jaud, Stephen Clarke, Alan Bennett and a few other authors I like too. I don't read every single day, sorry.

Movies (in no particular order) - Modern Times. Goodbye Lenin. Im Juni. The Diving Bell and the Butterfly. The Notebook. Shrek. Le Dîner de Cons. In Bruges. De-Lovely. The Lives of Others. Groundhog Day. The Comedian Harmonists. Belleville Rendezvous. Shawshank. Hotel Rwanda. Forest Gump. The Great Escape. Silence of The Lambs. Beverly Hills Cop. The Truman Show. Noi the Albino. Das Experiment. Match Point. The Day of the Jackal. Armageddon. The Lady Killers (Alec Guiness). Wallace and Gromit. Indiana Jones. Bright Young Things. 10 Things I Hate About You. Amistad. Le Grand Bleu. Connery and Brosnan's Bonds. The Sting. Laurel & Hardy.

Radio shows? I'd like to list a large part of Radio 2, 3 and 4's output and I practically learnt half of my German from Die Drei Fragezeichen.

Shows - Mr Selfridge, Boardwalk Empire, Ripper Street, Hustle, Sherlock, Q.I. and The Apprentice. In the past I enjoyed Mad Men, Lost, Heimat, Dittsche, House M.D, Jeeves & Wooster, Suchet's Poirot and Brett's Sherlock Holmes, not forgetting 15 storeys high.

Documentary-wise I like Panorama, Timeshift, OU, Storyville, Life in a Day-type films and anything from Attenborough, Jonathan Meades, Jeremy Vine, Neil Oliver, Louis Theroux, Cherry Healey, Dawn Porter, Melvyn Bragg and Michael Mosely.

(Bearing in mind I'm a professional musician) I can evaluate something in all forms of music although I do have my favourites -

Celtic, American, British and Greek folk music, Bach, Mozart, Beethoven, J Strauss, Debussy, Rachmaninoff, Elgar, Chorinhno, Barbershop, Ragtime, Early Jazz, Cole Porter, Irving Berlin, Gershwin, Joe Venuti & Eddie Lang, Louis Armstrong, Bix, Tram and Rank, Comedian Harmonists, Mills Brothers, Rodgers & Hammerstein, Art Tatum, Ella, Funk Brothers, Beach Boys, John Coltrane, Frank Sinatra, Nat 'King' Cole, Nelson Riddle, Piaf, The Beatles, Weird Al, Queen (Freddie), Tower of Power, Eric Clapton, Eagles, Fleetwood Mac, Bread, Stevie Wonder, Elton John, ABBA, Sting & The Police, Paul Simon, Bon Jovi, Michael Jackson, Pat Metheny, George Michael, Marc Anthony, Pet Shop Boys, Alison Krauss & Union Station, Die Prinzen, Pink Martini, Panic! At the Disco, Mika, Imogen Heap, Lady Antebellum.

And yes, I do like 'chart music' or 'top 40' though not particularly RnB, urban, dance, gangster rap and genres without a lot of actual musical notes, though there are exceptions, and I can often appreciate a song for its production or compositional value, just ask.
Blah, blah, blah... NAKED ELEPHANT. Oh sorry, I didn't expect many people to read through all that.

Food- British, French, Mexican, Italian, Greek, 'Indian', Thai.

Fortnum & Mason

But many people count things like quiche and pizza as English or British these days don't they? Oh I don't know then, but I do really like cooking lots of things, anything.

I also like soreen, fizzy drinks, chocolate, sweets and other crap.

I like dessert wines and champagne but you'll think I'm a pretentious twat If I list that here.

Music
My Friends - who are funnier and more sarcastic than me
Thinking about the future
Good shoes
Public transport
Internet - communication, entertainment, navigation, being able to look things up instantly I'm afraid

Life, my friends, sex, music, dreams, how things work, learning new stuff, places I will travel to in the future, how I will take over the world and...people who fraudulently claim benefits and/or those with no intention to work for a living.

Oh and how people in London generally don't converse with one another unless they're drunk.

Quite a number of you who are matched over 80% on here seem to have a cat; so does that say something about me I wonder?

Likely playing a gig, doing a rehearsal, at a friend's house, in a pub, with friends watching some music, a play, movie or eating out. Why isn't anyone honest and put 'sometimes I'm sitting at home on this website in my pyjamas'?

I did a bachelor of music degree in jazz performance!

But seriously, I'm more endearing and adorable and silly than this makes me look, but you'll just have to find out for yourself, won't you?

I messaged you first and you would like to be polite and reply.

Or if you don't have to think so hard whether you should or not.
- - -
Oh, and also if you can prove you earn more than $1,000,000 a year!? I do not.