(this one girl said i look like a doctor suess drawing.)
......i have to admit, that was mean...
But also kinda funny.
- you laugh at inappropriate times....
- you can tell a good anecdote.
- you're funny.... (at least you think so.)
- people think you're a tad weird...... but hey.
- you're curvy?.... ok....that's nice too.
Tips on how to please me:
- When you're making my coffee: nice and strong. (with 2%)
- You need to read to me while I am manfully fixing sh*t around the house.
- While I'm taking nap... make yourself useful and get dinner started.... something good.
- like pot roast.
- I will try to deal with your smart-ass english-major-y remarks, but don't think you won't be getting spanked.
- i hate weeding yard...(too tedious and futile) But will read my book nearby while you do it.
- Dancing.... (hey listen... if we're at the club... and they play a slow one..... i'll lead. You just look pretty and twirl when i want you to.)
- i like to nibble saltine crackers and ginger ale when feeling throw-uppy...(it would be nice if you could pat my hand, rub my head, and say soothing stuff.)
- I'm planning for us both to live well into old-age, riding our bikes, eating ice cream cones and solving mysteries like that one lady on murder she wrote.
- guess what....you will also be making me french toast on sunday. Be sure you make it right with a little sprinkle of cinnamon and confectioners sugar on top.
- by the way.... if you're a big sports fan, go find someone else.
I'm really only interested in one sport.
- It's called "banging you."
- (ok. occasionally i might play volleyball at somebody's
backyard cook out.)
My Flaws and Weaknesses:
check this out.
I'm the single greatest man you have ever met or ever will meet.
1. Can almost de-seal Delmonte single-serving
fruit cup without spilling all over self and/or others.
2. Looking after you...like for example... hugging you when you're having one of your irrational anxiety-spells at 2am about.... whatever....
....your idiot prom date
....some other crazy sh*t that happened to you in the 2nd grade.
I'm not looking for the perfect girl. Just the perfect one for me.