And all the things that you never ever told me, And all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me, Never coming home, never coming homeCould I? Should I? And all the wounds that are ever gonna scar me, For all the ghosts that are never gonna.

im scared of what i Won't become, and your scared of what i Could be come.

" Now, how many times must you prove you're an angel How many more demons do you have to strangle How much longer must you remain in this dream Before I finally figure out if you're insane or a genius "

For some reason, i still don't feel completly normal writing something like a journal entry online... but the only way to overcome discomfort, is to live through it and learn from it....ssssoooooo....

basically, spending a lazy monday at the house.... spent an hour checking out the close to fridgid beach by my house this morning.... loved it. almost nothing can bring me more comfort, then going to the beach on a nasty day and watching the chaotic scene of waves, pounding the sand un-mercifully... White water splashing up, constantly changing the outline and change of the beach, always new, bare, fresh... constant rebirth of the earth....
Seems to be the meloncholy overtone of my life as of late, always trying to change, re-discover myself and find out who I am and what I want from life. Learning from mistakes, over comming obsticles and trying to persaviere.... Break through the ridginess and conformity of what everyone expects of me and living out some dreams.....Like the first monkey shot into space, exploring myself and the world.