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31 M Auburn, WA

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 21–37
  • Located anywhere
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Sep 21
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Pisces, but it doesn’t matter
Working on university
Sales / Marketing
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Strictly monogamous
Doesn’t have kids
Likes dogs and has cats
English (Fluently), French (Poorly), Spanish (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.
- Augusten Burroughs
Recently moved to Auburn from Bellevue. Quite the change of venue. I did it for school and the betterment of my life. Here's hoping I don't fuck it up!
Hello! Welcome to my profile. I hope you enjoy your visit here!
I've been called many things, one of which is punctual, and gregarious.
Does this sum me up yet?
People ask me if my mouth gets me into trouble. I answer "Does the Pope poop in a fancy toilet?" Or some other really smart ass remark.
Also, I have been called a Smart Ass, to which I say, "Better a Smart Ass than a Dumb Ass." Which I feel is not helping to convince others that I am not a Smart Ass.
I've been on an inward reflection kick the past couple months. It's amazing what you can discover about yourself if you take all that processing power you use for distraction, working, and tune it into what's going on with you. So as a result I've discovered my passion and I am pursuing it.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Maturity is a bitter disappointment for which no remedy exists, unless laughter can be said to remedy anything.
- Kurt Vonnegut
I'm learning to fly, like literally. I've found my life calling.
Here's a joke, how do you know if there's a pilot in the room? Don't worry, they'll fucking tell you.
I do other things like work at a job I like but right now it's a means to an end. Karaoke when I can get a bunch of people together. Shoot guns when I can find ammo. Hike every chance I get. Play video games when I lack motivation. We're being honest here right?
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Drinking beer.
Making people laugh and finding the silver lining.
Brewing beer
Meeting new people.
Staying alive, 31 years of it so far and still going strong. It's really the longest time I've been doing anything.
Talking like a Pirate.
Being really immature.
Laughing at fart jokes.
Being really mature.
Not taking myself seriously.
Riding my bike.
Writing when it fancies me.
Talking to myself, sometimes I need expert advice.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Propriety was a rigid master, but one that must be obeyed if one wanted to keep a sterling reputation.
-Lawana Blackwell
My voice carries, like a pack mule. I could be full of b.s. but I've never noticed me for the first time.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
*I will be revamping this section soon to reflect my more current tastes. Or you can just skip it. Who reads these things anyway?*
A room without books is like a body without a soul.
Favorite Books:Ender's game, Political commentary and satire, the Dark Tower Series, Ishmael, Wine for Dummies, The Giver. I've been reading Sherlock Holmes, Blackwater by Scahill, The Alchemist. I'm usually reading anywhere from 2-4 books at a time.
Favorite TV shows: THE WALKING DEAD!, Archer, Futurama, South Park, The Daily Show and Colbert Report, Firefly, Dollhouse, Sherlock (BBC current version), Parks and rec, Battlestar Galactica (New version)
Favorite movies: Super Troopers, Office Space, Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind, BraveHeart, Dark Knight, Blazing Saddles, the new Star Trek (Don't knock it till you try it), Taken, Boondock Saints, Lord of the Rings, the classics like gone with the wind, casablanca and The Godfather I and II.
Music, I like the Foo Fighters, Johnny Cash, Coheed and Cambria, Future Fossils, Authority Zero, Flogging Molly, The Presidents (But only in Concert) Flight of the Concords, The Decemberists, Muse, Good local music. I love going to shows, like, a lot. If it's music and there's people playing it, I don't care I want to go.
I like food in my belly, and made with that special ingredient, love;) Honestly, anything I haven't tried before I want. I love onions but alas I cannot have them.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Close Friends, learning, fresh air, family, flying, a good beer.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
I never think of the future - it comes soon enough.
-Albert Einstein
Aardvarks. The word not the animal. Cameras. Photography. What objects can crush a human skull repeatedly (Champagne bottle yes, wine bottle no.) and how to use said items in the event of a zombie apocalypse. How many bottles I'll get out of my next brew. Interstellar space travel. What I'm going to eat on my lunch break. Where to go on my next cross country flight.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
At home! Or a local music venue, or starting a road trip, or Karaoke. If you love Karaoke then that's a plus. A gallery opening. Discovering a new great dive. Love dives. BBQ and beer with friends. All that being said my Fridays aren't "typical" because I don't work a "Typical" bankers schedule.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
I occasionally have dreams that spiders are attacking my face. Spiders don't scare me per se, but just like anyone else if one surprises me I'll startle and jump.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
So what am I looking for? Someone who can keep up. Someone who prefers beer to wine. Can quote Dumb and Dumber and Super Troopers, among others. Someone who wants to dance in a thunderstorm, and then does it.

And smiles. Someone who is brazen about their enjoyment of life.

Or message me if you want to. What's the worst that could happen?