...woman who desires the intimacy of years of conversation more than particular content of any one conversation. Hmm, maybe: .
..woman seeking a comfortable body to collapse upon after work, said body having instinctive massage fingers and soothing voice singing ‘90s adult contemporary songs in her ears. Oh and:
...woman who enjoys compliments about her stunning hair day, quirky breakfast routine, and endures playful mocking of her penchant for falling asleep at the start of movies in bed.
If that doesn’t leave much to the imagination about me, I’m sorry. What I mostly want say about me is that I feel what you’re feeling, or want to try really hard to. Because that’s what makes a great guy. But before I go off more about myself in lofty prose, allow me to preface a bit.
Now, there’s a lot of silliness that keeps people from connecting romantically, and little can be done about it. I don’t like women who intonate the end of every sentence (Canadians excepted), you don’t like guys carrying bike panniers into a restaurant on a first date (guilty!), and almost nobody cares much for the date that wants to schedule a meeting for every day after you gave them a pity kiss on the second date. It’s all good. We get together, usually feeling somewhere between mildly intrigued and grossed out, but we have a good time and love the fact that we live among lots of fascinating people that are hard to meet any other way. But...
If you’re that one in ten and there’s a charge running back and forth in the air between us, I’m going to do by darn chauvanisticist to romance you, sweet talk you, and impress you with my cool demeanor. And you’ll be flattered, or conveniently recall an ex-boyfriend that you still might be seeing, a month-long trip to the desert that starts tomorrow, or inform me that you’re just out of a three year relationship and are just playing the field (I’ve heard enough of them.) But if you do like me and I like you, and there are no strings attached, it’s a rare and joyful occasion.
The only purpose of that aside is to show you that I understand the realities of dating, especially online, and that I’m not unrealistic or inconveniently insane, rather I’m hopeful and a believer that magic does happen in dating. I try to bring a lot of playfulness to dating, as I do to the rest of my life. If I have to make a living in front of a computer, I’m sure not going to waste time being nervous or stuck up when I get to play with real people.
SOooo really about me now. I’m after the intimacy, the empathy, and the passion with my partner. I’m an awesome, stupendous guy. I spend my days dreaming about tearing down freeways and building eco-cities, and I write software that’s designed to do it. I learn German a capella songs and sing them while I bike down the street because I’m fascinated by language acquisition, plus singing is my personal facial massage. I run half-marathons without having ever jogged. I get arrested on my first and only trip to DC to protest the Keystone XL Pipeline. I play with my friends’ kids until they or I are exhausted and we’ve invented five new games that they will beg their parents to play with them later. I try lots of different activities (salsa dancing, sketching, triathlons, choirs, etc) so that I can meet great people and enrich my experiences, so there’s no question that most of the things that you love doing I will also get into and love too. I also travel to tropical rain forests and European cities, and I get on a long distance train every chance I get so I can read and write for days at a time and meet the middle of the country.
I could go on, but being awesome means that I have countless things to list and you’re tiring out on me. I’m pleased to admit that I also have a hearty allotment of imperfections, personal demons, and pain in my life, so don’t worry about meeting someone who doesn’t get you. I know I have a ton to learn about relationships, women, and maintaining happiness in life, but as Alanis says “I am aware now”, and hopefully you're thinking “you’ve already won me over, in spite of me” (yes, same song.)
I’m a patient fellow and prone to adaptation, so see if you like the initial package and then negotiate for better terms.