So let's be upfront with eachother, ok? Rad.

I'm looking for friends. By friends I mean internet friends, because I am addicted to chatting idly. Hopefully you are too. Hopefully this can escalate to tea or whatever, and maybe even one of those relationship deals. But I don't want to assume that you like me, because most people don't. So, if you do decide to message me, I'll just assume that you think I'm rad/funny/interesting/surprisingly grammatical. Because I am e) all of the above. Just don't be too surprised when I find myself pining for you, getting progressively more emo because I've already assumed that you could never Like me. It's just kind of what I do, and I haven't found a remedy for that behavior yet.

Now then. Hopefully you are as bored as me, and you will now message me and we can banter endlessly about cupcakes and video games and tea. Or we can talk about why guys who state in their profiles that they only like really fit girls or skinny girls are messaging me. Maybe you can bring some light to the situation, 'cause I can't make heads or tails of the logic there beyond "they are looking for an easy lay."

Anyways. Hi. I like nature and walkin' in it. I like cartoons, video games, and popsicles. I'm more like a 12 year old girl than I'd really like to admit, but people usually think I'm like...erm...generally either 24 or 16. Or something. I ain't no ho and I'm hilarious (sometimes) and cautious (when it shouldn't matter). Thank you.

Mragh. I wish I could say that I know exactly what I want to do with my life, that everything was planned out and perfect, blah blah blah blah blah. But no. It isn't. I'm only sure of my plans half of the time. I wasted a year at a large university, trying to get over my state of mind. And when I finally got to a point where I wasn't insane/sad/self destructive, it was community college time for me. So here I am, at my local community college, taking classes in rad fields, all in the interest of decidin' my future plans as a marine biology major. I'm pretty sure that I'd like to be a highschool biology teacher, or work in a large public aquarium like Monteray in animal husbandry or some shit like that. And I know that before I start to work in my career field, I'd like to volunteer for AmeriCorps...because I'm half hippy. And because in Americorps, I'm pretty sure I don't have to worry about being bit by a monkey. We'll see.

Aside from that... I dunno. I'm not adverse to the idea of collectin' a boyfriend in my journies, but I don't know where the boyfriend store is, and mapquest is notoriously dodgy.

Aaaaand by day I'm a student/gym rat/worker bee, so that is seriously all that's going on right now. I work as a part time au pair (mmm childrens, we talk about pokemon and environmentalism a lot) and in a crappy retail job, but it works.

And that is all I'm doing with my life right now. Ish.

I am a ninja of the highest degree when it comes to avoiding situations that may entail innuendo and the like. I'm also pretty good at cooking food that doesn't suck. And don't you worry, I'm also supremely gifted at ruining all my chances I may ever have had with you, Up Front.

That I:

a) am short,

b) I have blackish hair, and am entirely too pale.

c) I sing in my car, and I'm loud.

or d) I am entirely too happy for the current scenario.

It sounds lame, but I don't think that people notice me very often, as I try to keep my lip synching to myself.

Hmm.

a) The Zombie Survival Guide, Crime And Punishment, the Harry Potter series, Jane Eyre, Pride and Prejudice (I may or may not love the BBC miniseries too much), Hitchhiker's Guide, a whole bunch of other books...., and The Lord Of The Rings. The New Jedi Order series. I can't help it, I'm a dork.

b) LoTR, Kung Pow, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Shaun of the Dead, Secretary, Serenity, PnP, Finding Nemo, a series of fun indie films and B movies that take themselves seriously, the original Star Wars trilogy, and All I Want.

c) I love The Strokes, Clinic, Cyrine, Elissa, Buddha Bar, Regina Spektor, Tegan and Sarah, Fiona Apple, Shakira (please continue to love me, because my hips don't lie either), Mindless Self Indulgence, Inspection 12, OK GO, David Bowie, Queen, Violent Femmes, The B-52s, Siouxie and the Banshees, and Franz Ferdinand but I also enjoy my record "Coffee Break With A Latin Beat" and Oingo Boingo (ohhhhhh I love them!). Old punk=the best punk. I'm an elitest it the best way when it comes to my punk. I generally just appreciate and love all music, unless it's country. But folk is cool. Also, you can never go wrong with some old school rap, 'cause Shaniqua don't live here no more.

d) I like Skittles and tend to hoard apples. Apples are ok, but I just really like how they smell. If I were to eat one thing for the rest of my life, it'd have to be sandwiches. I refuse to get more specific than that, but chicken curry sandwiches are pretty amazing. Also, I love eating chicken 'cause it's almost like eating a dinosaur, which is deeply satisfying for some reason.

e) I've decided that there needs to be a TV bit: Firefly, Dirty Jobs, Mythbusters, , Scrubs, What Not To Wear, other crap on the Food Network (I know nearly nothing about cooking, so that shit's like magic), and that's about it, aside from the occasional cartoon and whatnot.

There's more, but I'm lazy and I'm sure you don't care THAT much.

1) Friends (not the show, I'm talkin' about my posse, fool.)

2) My glasses. I'm hilariously blind without them, and though I have contact lenses I hate them with a passion. It's just...unnatural looking. And I hate the eye poking.

3) eyecandy

4) my stuffed sea otter Nino. Or my kitty and puppy. My cat seriously outweighs my puppy like 10 times over and I love it.

5) I have found that I cannot go long without physical affection in some form. (My favorite form is either couch-cuddling during movies and the like, or my guilty pleasure of thighs touching during whatever)

6) Suzanne Somers. She's on HSN all the time, and she's freaking hilarious. She's soooo old, and is always making the cameraman zoom in on her flabby, old neck. It's awesome. Heck, I think infomercials in general. But Suzanne is the best.

Naturally, there are other things that are probably more important, but that's what I'm goin' with for now.

Uhhh...I guess I spend a lot of time thinking about...boys...and school...and parleing the francais. Or my lack thereof. And umm...lame marine boilogy trivia that makes me "interesting" to go to aquariums with.

Ha. Sleeping, probably. But one the rare occasion that I'm not sleeping or slaving away on the internet, I'm probably enjoying a lovely movie with friends or dancing when no one is looking. Or y'know. Working. Which is less exciting than hanging out with my friends and whatnot, but it's the truth.

Hi. I'm chubbly. I'm workin' on a remedy for that life-long affliction, but if you can't get over that fact, then I guess that I'm over you. And then there was more honesty/hilarity (have I mentioned that I'm odd and hilarious and well...oddly hilarious?).

Whenever I see a pretty boy, I freeze up and end up starin' at the ground. And then I sometimes walk into poles/other people/walls. Damn you, pretty boys!

Also, apparently I am allergic to most soaps and lotions? Basically anything that isn't 100% glycerin soap makes me itchy and sad, and I can only tolerate hand soap because I rinse my hands more thoroughly than anyone else on the planet. The best part about this is that my boss ALWAYS gets me lotions and soaps for my birthday/Christmas which is so well intentioned and I love her for it, but results in a lot of regifting because if I use the stuff I will be itchy and miserable for hours.

I am probably not as shy as this profile makes me out to be. I don't really like talking to strangers in the real world, but if it's in a social situation I'll try to be polite and engaging and amusing. When people talk to me at like the grocery store and I don't know them, I try to cut it short and walk away. But that doesn't neccessarily mean "shy." Maybe "wary." Either way, I'm damn near impossible to shut up once you get to know me and I'm in the mood. Anyways. Not sure how well "shy" applies to me anymore.

You:

1) are bored and have no qualms about talking with strangers

2) are interested like, at all. Preferably in me and not out of desperation 'cause I like to think I'm pretty cool sometimes.

3) you think we could be friends!

Oh damn it, just message me. I'm bored and chatty. And like, sometimes I'm funny too. Come on. It'll be a party, promises.