-"Athletic" and "average" are not synonymous with, "I can't put down the fork."
-I drink, but not to get wasted. I've been there and done that. If you drink, you need to be able to handle your booze. Babysitting sucks.
-You don't need to write about how tired you are, as an excuse for having an incomplete or lame profile. Boring needs no translator. Equally lame is one that just says, "ask me!" No. You need to put in some of the work.
I think political correctness is awful; the raunchier and more offensive the humor, the better. If you don't enjoy a good laugh, then you should locate the back button on your browser.
I don't have any kids. I'm a fan of spontaneously doing something or going out if I feel like it. Having said that, I've retired from the constant bar scene. It was fun for awhile, but I've moved on. We'll get along much better if you don't need to go out 24/7. I think it's called real life and growing up. Plus, I have slightly less tolerance for douchebags with each passing day.
Not interested in games, flings, or being your rebound. If you're "separated," that's still married. No thanks.
If you actually understand sarcasm and have a sense of humor, then message me.