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33 M Oakland, CA

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 25–38
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Today – 2:10am
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
A little extra
Mostly anything
Trying to quit
Agnosticism, but not too serious about it
Gemini, but it doesn’t matter
Dropped out of masters program
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
English, Dutch (Poorly)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm just doing my thing, trying to make it on this big ol' ball of dirt like everybody else. Like termites.

I'm an introvert, even though I'm pretty loud.

I've always worked in politics/organizing and the non-profit industrial complex in the past, but I am "retired" from that now ("if voting actually changed anything..." and all that). I've managed campaigns and been a labor organizer, and right now I'm trying to slow things down and enjoy life a bit more. I'm currently trying to learn more about gardening, and how I can figure out a way to make lots and lots of money without knowing how to make an iphone app or whatever the hell it is people are doing around here for money. I'd eventually like to have a small farm of my own at some point.

I rarely drink, I would much rather prefer to smoke a joint or two instead. I like coffee though, any time.

I love riding my bike, but am legitimately terrified to do so here in the Bay area. I've never met so many people who have been hit by a car while riding in my entire life.

I also play guitar (poorly), and also bought a cheap Casio a while back, lying to myself that I would teach myself how to play keyboard. It now gathers dust on a shelf in my closet. So if you want to come over sometime and play the piano part to Bob Seger's "Still the Same" while I strum along, that would be awesome.

I also just got a new toy from REI (the one place I actually like to shop), an inflatable tandem kayak! Let me know if you'd like to go paddle around.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Trying to open a retail store. It's kind of a pain in the ass.

Just edited my profile a bit. This is still a pain in the ass.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Rolling spliffs. I joke about my 10,000 Malcolm Gladwell hours going into this, but seriously, I can roll a pretty nice spliff, if you'd ever like me to demonstrate.

I also am a pretty good cook, as long as it consists of throwing various items in a pot with wine and roasting it for a long time.

This section is hard for me. As I've mentioned I'm a bit shy, and it feels weird saying things that aren't half-assed and jokey. I'm good at caring. I care about a lot of things. I care about people, and how this world is a fucked up place and what we can do about it and what we all have to do to get by and make the best of it. I care about injustice and oppression, and even though I may come off as a cynic, I'm really just a damned disappointed idealist. There's probably a quote about that somewhere.

I'm good at listening, better than I am at talking most times.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Probably my long, flowing hair? Maybe my eyes? I also get asked if I'm hapa a lot, but nope, unless you mean part "native american" or "indian" (ugh, really don't like either of those terms, hence the scare-quotes.)
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I usually only skim this section on most folks' profiles, and I kind of assume most others do the same. There's already too much text on this profile, so why not ask me? Good stuff, I promise.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Ice water.
Amsterdam Shag rolling tobacco (although I'm seriously, seriously trying to quit soon, I promise).
Some pot to add to the tobacco above, and a paper to put it in.
Something to read.
Something to listen to.
I sometimes do without sunshine, but it's not really doing.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Ewige Blumenkraft und ewige Schlangenkraft.

Also, how much cooler it would be if I didn't have to do dumb things like "work" at a "job" just to get "money" to pay the "rent" and buy "food" (and no, I don't know why those words are in scare quotes. so?).

That it's annoying that I'm listed as "more drug friendly" on this website. I smoke marijuana both medicinally (migraines, anxiety, insomnia) and recreationally. I don't drink, have never ever tried coke or heroin or amphetamines, have done mdma once and didn't find teeth-grinding and feeling gross particularly fun, and do psychedelics maybe once a year. Maybe. Last time I used psychedelics was microdoses last summer to try to break a cluster headache cycle. I used to work in drug policy reform, for lots of reasons. One big reason (setting aside the obvious soul-crushing reality of the criminal justice system) is that I really, really dislike marijuana/drug culture (420 slang, insularity, sexism, dabs, the lack of ambition that makes productive pot-smokers look bad by association, general bro/stoner culture, etc etc), and like being able to buy my pot at a clean, well-lit store rather than a sketchy dufus drug-dealer. I'm looking forward to when "cannabis" is just another pulldown menu under "smokes" and "drinks" on the sidebar of this site, not in the catch-all "drugs" (actually I'm not looking forward to that as realistically by the time that happens I really hope I have met a nice lady to be my partner and am not on this site still.)
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Hopefully getting my tent set up for a weekend camping trip. Oakland Museum Night is pretty cool. Maybe hanging out with a few friends and playing some music. Maybe New Parkway? Or, staying in and smoking some joints, reading, listening to music, decompressing.

Love going to shows, want to see more live music. Know anything good coming up?

Most likely not at a bar or club, but stranger things have happened.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm colorblind, and it is just like this:

I have really bad fashion sense, and am extremely lucky that I've been able to get away with wearing jeans, a t-shirt, and a hoodie everyday for work for the last few years now. The colorblindness doesn't help in this department either.

I have horrible insomnia.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You are slightly less shy than me.

You are a funny, cute, literate lady who likes to smoke pot, go on hikes, sleep late, and snuggle and such.

You actually want to meet in person. Coffee is not scary, right?

You want to get in a bit more camping this year before it gets too cold and wet.

Also, there is a Stanley Kubrick film festival going on at Berkeley BAM/PFA the next month or so. Unfortunately will be out of town for Barry Lyndon (my favorite!) but will be around for the remainder. Wanna go see Dr. Strangelove on the big screen with me?

PS - you are preferably (but not mandatorily) East Bay.