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48 M Trenton, NJ

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 5:22pm
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Strictly vegetarian
Graduated from university
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Has a kid
Has dogs

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My self-summary
Friends say I'm intelligent, artistic, witty and offbeat (but they took away my official nerd card when I stopped playing video games). Moderately well educated, I'm a good conversationalist with a dry (ok, also weird) sense of humor. I like books, cinema, art & music, but not TV.

I'm also married, so if that's a deal breaker, thanks for your time. My wife and I are exploring opening up our relationship after many years of monogamy (and a couple of not-quite-monogamy.) Not sure yet where this will all lead, but so far I've found out we're not alone on this journey, not by a long shot.

So just to be clear, though, I'm not especially looking for casual sex. I have neither the temperament nor the inclination to be a "player." I'm hoping to find a real connection with someone I can get to know, and have some adventures with (and not just the bedroom kind). I'm looking for more of a heart connection.

I think labels only go so far, but the one that gets used for this kind of thing is polyamory. It's distinct from swinging, because it's NOT just about married people hooking up. And it's distinct from cheating because both spouses know what's going on and are OK with it, so nobody's being lied to. If this idea freaked you out, I'm sorry. I don't want to freak anybody out.

One final note: I always check out the profiles of people who visit mine, but if I see you are looking for someone who is "single" I'm not going to reach out. This is probably just fine with 99% of visitors, but in case you are in the 1% I thought you'd like to know.
What I’m doing with my life
I'm living it. I'm taking care of my family. I'm seeing the beauty of the world around me. I'm trying to be a good friend and positive force in my little corner of this shrinking planet. I keep asking God if there's anything else he wants me to be doing. I guess he'll let me know if something comes up.

My career is going OK and I'm making a living, but not a killing. I'm passionate about what I do though, which is try to humanize technology. It's great to be able to stand up for the little guy, even if I'm not fighting injustice or saving the planet. (I'm more of a hobbyist in those areas.)

I'm perpetually trying to find more time for creative pursuits. And sleep. But a lot of my time just seems to go to driving back and forth to work, doing the laundry, and trying to keep the dogs from waking up the neighbors. So it goes.
I’m really good at
Computers :-P I've been a techie for a long time, and I can do at least a little bit and sometimes a lot of nearly everything computer-related. I'm pretty awesome at generally figuring out how things work.

Also conversation. Yeah I said that already. Apparently I'm also good at repeating myself.

I am a good communicator, though. I know how to listen, even if I don't always do so perfectly. I can turn a phrase. I try to be insightful and empathetic. I don't dismiss people even when I disagree with them.
The first things people usually notice about me
If people notice me at all, which is far from given, they probably get that I'm smart. And that I have a unique take on things. I don't generally stand out in a crowd. But give me a small group and watch out. Heads will spin.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books - I went through a period of only reading non-fiction for a while, but I got past it. History, anthropology and psychology are some of my favorite topics. I have an endless fascination with the workings of the human mind. I also have a sweet tooth for trashy science fiction novels, but it's not all I read. I've also been reading a lot of YA stuff, because that's what my daughter is reading and it's something we can have in common.

Movies - I LOVE movies but I don't go to nearly enough of them. I like an odd combination of art house cinema and comic-booky action flicks. Actually, I like nearly anything. Documentaries, if they're well made. Indie films. The occasional summer blockbuster. The only genre I'm not really interested in is horror films, which seem to mostly be about gross-outs these days. (Not that they were ever about very much more than that.)

Shows - I don't watch TV.

(long, awkward pause)

Um, so moving on...

Music - I've pretty much given up on the whole idea of musical taste since I figured out that limitimg my exposure to things I might enjoy wasn't really serving any good purpose. I will listen to anything and probably like some of it. My heart belongs to 70s rock even though nobody thinks it's cool anymore. I like classical but not well enough to reliably tell Stravinsky from Janacek. And someday I'm going to be that old man who still listens to bubblegum pop on the radio, and I'm just fine with that.

Food - I do like all kinds of food but I'm a vegetarian, so there's that. I'm not hard-core about it. Other people eating meat bothers me not in the least. Still, we're probably not going to a steakhouse on our first date.
The six things I could never do without
Music, something to read, imagination, interesting skies, caring people, hope for the future.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Justice. Sex. Art. The last conversation I had with my wife. Gadgets. The future.
On a typical Friday night I am
looking to get out of the house against all odds.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 30–53
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex
You should message me if
• You're open minded
• You already have a primary relationship but are looking for some extra fun and companionship
• You're interested in discussing or finding out more about polyamory