Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Despite being polite and a bit old-fashioned, about the only thing
I'm intolerant of is people who walk too slowly on the sidewalk.
Probably because I grew up in PA, came of age in NY and am now in
central NJ. Friends say I'm witty, artistic, and offbeat, and I'm a
good conversationalist with a dry (ok, also weird) sense of
I'm also married, and my wife and I are both joyfully exploring
open, honest non-monogamy. I think labels only go so far, but the
one that gets used for this is polyamory
. I know it's popular these
days, but that's only because it's awesome.
I'm not especially looking for casual sex. I don't have the
inclination, temperament or time to be promiscuous, despite having
heard wonderful things about it. I'm hoping to make real
connections and have some adventures but in the end I'm looking for
more of a girlfriend, someone with whom I can share a heart
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm taking care of my family. I'm seeing the beauty of the world
around me. I'm trying to be a good friend and positive force in my
little corner of this shrinking planet.
My career is going OK and I'm making a living, but not a killing.
I'm passionate about what I do though, which is try to humanize
technology. It's great to be able to stand up for the little guy,
even if I'm not fighting injustice or saving the planet. (Those are
I help run a local meetup group called PolyNJ
that supports people in
non-monogamous relationships and I'm also involved with other
tri-state area poly events like OpenLoveNY
's monthly poly
I'm perpetually trying to find more time for creative pursuits.
Just took up the piano for the first time after years of dreaming
about it. I also dabble with writing & movie making.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I've been a techie for a long time, and I can do at least a little
bit and sometimes a lot of nearly everything computer-related. I'm
pretty awesome at generally figuring out how things work.
Also conversation. Yeah I said that already. Apparently I'm also
good at repeating myself.
I am a good communicator, though. I know how to listen,
even if I don't always do so perfectly. I can turn a phrase. I try
to be insightful and empathetic. I don't dismiss people even when I
disagree with them.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Probably that I'm smart, and that I have a unique take on things. I
don't generally stand out much in a crowd. But give me a small
group and watch out. Heads will spin.
Also, people are often surprised when they find out my age since I
look a lot younger than I am.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books - I went through a period of only reading
non-fiction for a while, but I got past it. Now I strive for more
of a balance. History, anthropology and psychology are some of my
favorite topics. I have an endless fascination with the workings of
the human mind. I also have a sweet tooth for trashy science
fiction novels, but it's not all the fiction I read.
On my Kindle now: Debt: The First 5000 Years by D. Graeber,
American Nations by C. Woodard, Homeland by C. Doctrow, Saturn's
Children by C. Stross, Three Felonies A Day by H. Silverglate. As
for my dead trees pile, I just finished No Place To Hide by G.
Greenwald and I'm now working through a biography of Ian
Movies - I LOVE movies but I don't go to nearly
enough of them. I like an odd combination of art house cinema and
comic-booky action flicks. Actually, I like nearly anything.
Documentaries, if they're well made. Indie films. The occasional
summer blockbuster. The only genre I'm not really interested in is
horror. CNN's website is good enough for that, most days.
A fairly random sampling of favorites old and new: Wish I Was Here,
Moonrise Kingdom, Inception, Avatar, Everything Is Illuminated,
Lars and the Real Girl, Mystery Men, the Harry Potter Series (but
the books were better), even-numbered Trek movies, The Matrix,
Raising Arizona, Back To The Future, Flash Gordon, Streets Of Fire,
and anything by Kubrick.
Shows - I don't watch TV.
(long, awkward pause)
Um, so moving on...
Music - I've pretty much given up on the whole
idea of musical taste since I figured out that limitimg my exposure
to things I might enjoy wasn't really serving any good purpose. I
will listen to anything and probably like some of it. My heart
belongs to 70s rock even though nobody thinks it's cool anymore. I
like classical but not well enough to reliably tell Stravinsky from
Janacek. And someday I'm going to be that old man who still listens
to bubblegum pop on the radio, and I'm just fine with that.
Food - I like all kinds of food but I'm a
vegetarian, so we're probably not going to a steakhouse on our
first date. I love flavors from all over the world- Korean food is
a favorite. I'm more drawn to rich flavors than to spicy ones. Also
love picking a great wine or beer to complement both the meal and
When tempted, I have been known to eat dessert before dinner. You
have been warned.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Music, something to read, imagination, interesting skies, caring
people, hope for the future.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Justice. Sex. Art. The media. The last conversation I had with my
wife. Gadgets. The future. And that's just on a typical drive to
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Looking to get out of the house against all odds. Unless it's my
wife's night with her boyfriend. Then I'm thinking about My Little
Pony, because that's what I watch with my daughter on Fridays when
Mom's away. (We are both too old for it. Neither of us cares.)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I look at the photos first.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
• You're smart
• You're open minded
• You're >90% OK with open relationships / polyamory
• You already have a primary relationship but are looking for a
• You're interested in discussing or finding out more about
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.