I’m a decent guy. I’m pretty well adjusted, courteous, compassionate, and reasonable. I think of my feminist orientation as a part of that: just treating everyone well, including women. If you called me ‘humanist,’ I wouldn’t argue.
I was brought up by a feminist mother, with a feminist sister. I am most comfortable around strong women who expect to be treated with respect. I need to like and admire you to date you or be serious about you. I don’t come across as a ‘bad boy.’ Or any kind of boy, for that matter.
Sexually, I’m an adult. You can say no to me without fear and yes without shame. I’m a regular listener of the Savage Love podcast, with a solid understanding of what GGG means (and doesn’t mean), and what consent means (and doesn’t mean). I use my words. Let’s use our words together.
I don’t have a need to blow your mind with my awesome bedroom skills, or impress you with my income. I have my shit together. That’s all you need to know right now.
If I message you, that means I read your profile. And I probably looked at some of your answers to the questions. I don’t feel entitled to a response. I just don’t spam women here. I use OkC the way it seems to be designed to be used.
I’m basically a grown-ass man. I'm looking for a grown-ass woman.
OK, now that we've established that I am potty trained and ready for online dating, this is more about me:
I weigh about 135 pounds. My favorite color is blue. My turn-ons include skepticism, absurdism and joyous nonsense, chocolate, urbanism, interesting technology and good design--including, of course, bikes. My turn-offs include drama, intellectual and political purism, my own laziness, excessive exclamation points, and bad breath.
I love Chicago. Maybe not the greatest city in the world, but certainly the best.
Mastery of things is a core aspect of my personality. I can demonstrate some mastery in writing, cooking, programming, and probably other things. I like to be good at things I do, and I set high standards for myself.
I can do the chivalry thing if you need me to, but for me being a ‘gentleman’ is more about respect for women than opening doors and paying for dinner. (Again, feminism.)
I don't give a hell of a lot of credibility to Myers-Briggs, but ENTP describes me really, really well. I have a lot of social circles, and every circle knows a side of me, but no one knows everything about me. I'm a long conversation. I like to make things with my friends.
My techie friends might know I'm Buddhist, but won't know much about it unless they ask. My Buddhist friends know I'm a techie, but won't know much about it unless they ask. Most folks know I'm car-free, but won't know much about it unless they ask. My bikey friends know I go to Burning Man, but... you get the idea. It's not like I have a bunch of secret lives, I'm just not that interested in talking about myself. Tell me about you.
I am geeky, but 'hacker' is probably a better description for me than 'geek'--hacker in the original sense of the word, bending technology to my will in fun ways. Science fiction is like porn to me: diverting, but I'd rather do the real thing.