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comedian915

33 M Attleboro, MA

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 5:51pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Atheism, and laughing about it
Sign
Virgo, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from high school
Job
Sales / Marketing
Income
$50,000–$60,000
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Pets
Speaks
English

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My self-summary
So I decided to completely redo my profile from a year ago because I am in a completely different place in my life right now as opposed to a year ago.

My name is Matt. I like to think I am your "regular guy" but with a twist. I love to make people laugh. I was a stand up comedian for 4 years and love being on the stage. Unfortunately I have a new job and had to give it up for a little while. People at my new job think there is something wrong with me because I am always smiling and always trying to make everyone at work smile regardless of how our day is going. I think that is a good trait to have and I hope to find someone that is very positive also.

I am always the first person on the dance floor at a wedding. Because why not? Who cares what people think? I don't mind looking like an idiot if I'm having fun doing it. I love to act ridiculous and let loose and just enjoy life.

Laughter is a must for me so please be able to take a joke. That doesn't mean I am going to prank you and spray you with a hose or something equally ridiculous . But be able to take edgy humor and be funny with me. Life is supposed to be funny. Be crazy like "Let's do Elton John/George Michael karaoke duet" not crazy like you tell me "My boyfriend used to shove cake into my face in the bedroom". I wish I could tell you the latter of those two isn't actually something that happened in my life on a date but I cannot.

I am suburban boy born and raised. I love going into the city every once and a while. Whether it's Providence or Boston doesn't matter to me. I love my hometown teams Sox, Pats, C's and B's. Revs don't count. Baseball is definitely my favorite sport though. I played for close to ten years and still love going and taking swings at the batting cages.

I am a hard person to sum up in a couple small paragraphs. But I guess that is me in a nutshell. So message me if you would like to chat a little. Maybe we can talk about your favorite Canadian animal or what the GOP has been up to lately. (Does 'tongue in cheek' humor translate well in these profiles?) But let's just say I am looking for my "girl next door" and maybe it's you. Or maybe not. So maybe say "Hi." Maybe I can stop saying the word "maybe" so much.
What I’m doing with my life
I am an Executive Sales Specialist for one of the big banks. I'll give you a hint it begins with a "B" and ends with "America". And although I no longer do stand-up I still do a lot of writing.
I’m really good at
Talking to people. I am a very charismatic person and can connect with just about anyone that I meet.
Karaoke. I do a great rendition of "Your Song" by Elton John
Public speaking. I am very comfortable on a microphone.
The first things people usually notice about me
My mom used to always say "Your big brown eyes are going to be the death of me one day".
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: World War Z, anything by Chuck Palahniuk or Truman Capote
Movies: Way too many to name. Shawshank Redemption, Oldboy, City of God, Wet Hot American Summer just to name a few.
Shows: Arrested Development, Party down, It's Always Sunny, Breaking Bad, The Walking Dead, South Park, True Detective
Music: Don't have a particular taste in music. Just whatever sounds good.
Food: I'm pretty easy with food too but nothing beats a good steak.
The six things I could never do without
1. My Mom (not a 'momma's boy'. It's just my mom is the best)
2. Internet
3. Laughter
4. Breakfast food
5. The Red Sox
6. Cologne (Always had a fear of being 'the smelly kid' when I was younger. I must always be clean and smell good)
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Why do so many girls have pictures of themselves in their car? I don't think I have ever had my picture taken of myself when I was in my car.
On a typical Friday night I am
I am probably out enjoying a few cocktails somewhere with friends.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I people watch constantly. I can sit in a mall and watch people and make fun of them in my head for hours. I am easily entertained.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 22–36
  • Near me
  • For new friends
You should message me if
One of the first things you say to me isn't "Oh I'm not crazy" cause you probably are. Also you are not easily offended and can take a joke. If you are "larger than life" and don't care what people think. You are not afraid to share your feelings whether they are good or bad. Communication is key. And you don't actually think people ever say "Hey that is a cool picture that you took of yourself in the mirror"