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dastan_irl

24 Calgary, Alberta, CA Man

Man

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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 18–24
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 5:59pm
Orientation
Pansexual
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body type
Average
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Religion
Other, and laughing about it
Sign
Leo, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Working on university
Job
Construction
Income
$30,000–$40,000
Status
Single
Type
Strictly non-monogamous
Offspring
Has kids, and might want more
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Okay), Other (Fluently)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm a white male. There is literally nothing I can put here that will sound good. I'm going to try to sound like I'm not on too many government watch lists.

I'm pansexual, though I'm pretty picky about what I find attractive, gender just has nothing to do with it.
I'm otherwise a pretty boring person. I watch anime and stay home. I'm usually too tired to go out. I don't drink often. I own cargo khaki shorts and golf shirts. I will probably tell a dad joke and laugh at it. That's how boring I am. Seriously. I'm so not cool I still have trouble with the fact I convinced a girl to have kids with me and almost get married. Like mind boggling. I assume I'm like the snake from jungle book.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I keep pretty busy with work. I don't really have a lot of close friends so I don't go out much. I'm okay with that because I enjoy spending weekends with my three lovely children.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Metal work, layout, physics, minutia, the usual stuff.
My true skills however lie in finding the obscure. I can find anything regardless of whether or not it actually exists.

I have a magic silver tongue and can out talk the devil. Which I assume should be expected, considering it's his tongue.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm loud and obnoxious. I'm also very open about my weirdo paraphilia and general sexuality.
I have fluffy hair and never seem to have clothes that count as clothing.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
......no. I refuse. No.
.....
......
Sylvia Day. Don't you judge me. Men can like that sort of thing too.

I watch anime.
I play jrpgs, gal games, and things my kids bring me. I have been known to eat things my kids bring me before checking it's not floor candy or a bug. It's a wonder I'm still alive really.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1)Pie
2) panties
3)pink things
4) chocolate milk
5) beefcake/cheesecake types
6)my fur blanky
Not in any particular order but numbered for convenience.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
My mind is a terrifying place to those unaccustomed to its environs . I'm rather lecherous and oddly philosophical. I also write sometimes, albeit poorly. I spend my commute contemplating the sexual orientation of attractive men and the style and colour of a ladies panties. I spend my alone time contemplating existence like every other person ever..
I frequently discuss, often in silence, the amazing nature of cephalopods. I also imagine what life on titan and europa might look like.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
I'm failing at being sufficiently omnipresent like every other day of the week.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I use the eight pointed star of chaos to represent my sexuality.

I'm actually a lot more mature and responsible than I tell people I am. I get grumpy when people notice I'm actually a decent person and not the amoral scumbag I claim to be. Also, if you tell anyone about me being a responsible adult or a kind young man that cares about others they will never find your body.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
If you have a factoid that you treasure
Or
You don't mind telling me about your panties
Or
You just need to talk because you're fucking lonely like everyone else in the world.
Or
You're a chesty young nerd girl.

Likewise if you have trouble using your words or telling people no or think the silent treatment is somehow a viable form of communication don't bother. I don't have the lifespan for that bullshit.

I honestly probably need a 24/7 sexting partner with as few squicks as possible because I have a serious libido problem I'm not sure I want to acknowledge yet.