Wow, don't you hate all the lies people tell about themselves here?!?! I can't believe some of the stuff I've been reading on other peoples profiles. You'd think they were next in line for Sainthood.

And even if they aren't intentional lies, chances are they are extremely subjective perceptions of their own realities of the planet they've been living on most of their lives, and it ain't earth.

We'll I guess I'd be a hypocrite if I were to promise you anything different. In fact, the only thing will promise you is that I am a hypocrite. I just love to point fingers at other people and then engage in the exact same behavior. I'm also lazy, selfish, deluded, prideful, self-righteous, insecure, discontent, and dishonest (that last one applies only when it is personally advantageous for me to be so). But the absolute worst thing about me is that I am no different from anyone else on here- except for the fact that I am saving us both a bunch of time, and unrealistic fantasizing, by telling you this now, so that you can move on to the next Prince Charming with a better elevator pitch.

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Ok, if you are still reading this, you've got to be either masochistic, intensely curious about who this weirdo is, or laughing hysterically because you like jaded sarcasm and have found it to be a good mental survival skill, or some combination of all three. Either way, we should probably move on to the next step.

If we were to date, there are things I can do with a moderate/high amount of skill and interest. There might be things you like to do, where I have no skill, but may have interest. And there are things that I have no interest in and will not do. I'll try to detail the first and last of these:

skill/interest: camping, hiking, rock climbing, movies, food, road trips, snowboarding, beach trips, roller coasters, backpacking, mountain biking, some concerts, comedy shows, warm water scuba, Netflix, bowling, flying single engine aircraft, volunteering, traveling. There's more but I can't think of it now (or I can't mention it on a public website).

NO skill/interest: country music, line dancing, golf, tennis, opera, political protests, tree hugging, movies with Diane Keaton, black licorish, road biking, poker. There's more of these too (lots more).

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If there are a few matches above and you are still reading this, you may as well know a few more details about me. I make money as a contract web developer. I currently live on the SF Peninsula, but have no particular love for the place. I'm not married or currently cheating on anyone by being here (god, isn't that exactly what someone who's cheating would say). I have no prior felonies or outstanding arrest warrants. I'm not violent towards others (only myself). I like kids and animals because their capacity for evil is less than adults. My credit isn't spotless, but there is no current outstanding debt. Nor are there any legal judgments against me. You'll find all this out when you run a background check on me. I work out daily, not to be healthy, but because I'm vain and can't stand being fat. Curiously though, I am open having a partner who's fat, as long as she feels sexy and secure about it. Physical attributes aren't as important to me as they were in my 20s.

Anyways enough rambling for now.

De-emphasizing career and focusing on relationships. I'm deeply engaged in a program of active, positive spiritual development.

Analytical problem solving, divergent thinking. Wasting time.

Upon first contact, I often come across as disinterested or preoccupied. It doesn't mean that I am, and you'll find that out if we get to know each other. It's just the look that God "blessed" me with.

From my FB page:

Favorite Music:
Latin Jazz, Party Hip Hop, Punk, Classic Rock

Neil Young, Joni Mitchell '68-'79, Black Eyed Peas, Violent Femmes, Tito Puente, The Smiths, Jimi Hendrix, Lou Reed, The Pretenders, Steely Dan '72-'77, Eric Clapton, Grateful Dead.
Favorite TV Shows:
Lost, Heroes, Celebrity Rehab Sober House, Rescue Me, The Office, Desperate Housewives, Breaking Bad, Weeds, Dexter, Sons of Anarchy, Californication
Favorite Movies:
The Big Leibowski, Apocalypse Now, Midnight Cowboy, Good Fellas, Platoon, Napoleon Dynamite, Superbad, Airplane, The English Patient, Repo Man, The Last Picture Show, Napoleon Dynamite, Caddyshack
Favorite Books:
The Grapes of Wrath, or anything by Steinbeck.

hope, intimacy, broadband internet, pizza, netflix, blue skies

Not spending my time trying to make friends online.

I've been a friend of Bill W. for a few years now, but I'm not self-righteous about it.

...you are ready for some excitement, can deal with dry/deadpan humor, are not close-minded or hopelessly conservative, are not the jealous or possessive type, don't wear excessive makeup, your boobs and tan are both real.