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dharmacowboy

63 M Berkeley, CA

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 1:46pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 2″ (1.88m)
Body Type
Fit
Diet
Mostly other
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Religion
Buddhism, and laughing about it
Sign
Pisces, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Working on masters program
Job
Construction
Income
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Has a kid, but doesn’t want more
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English, Spanish (Okay)

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My self-summary
I have been repeatedly humbled by the realization that we are not in charge of our destinies. What we think we want, what we actually want, and what we get occasionally cross paths, but more often than not, no matter what we do, it's just pure dumb luck.
I've become pretty good at embracing the uncertainty. I've had plenty of practice.
I recently read that we need intimate relationships to cultivate our souls. We bang into each other's rough, sharp edges until they gradually wear away. We appreciate each other's strength, kindness, vulnerability and playfulness.
Either that, or it's another train wreck. Yup, dumb luck.
What I’m doing with my life
Nurturing those things I value, getting rid of those things I don't. Letting go of what is lost, looking for what might be found. Trying to get in at least a couple of good days of skiing.
I’m really good at
Pretty much anything I put my mind to. Which is 'enjoy life and have fun' as much as I can. When duty calls I'm not too bad at it, either. I've invented a fictitious wise father, and one of the things he supposedly told me is "never get really good at something you don't enjoy." Unfortunately, in real life I had to learn that lesson the hard way. Yup, kind of a slow learner. But I'm finally starting to get it.
The first things people usually notice about me
Let's see. A new dance class partner told me I 'provide a good frame'. I've been told I missed a career opportunity doing movie trailers. You know, "In a future world..." Yeah, I have a deep voice. I recently had someone miss guessing my age by 15 years.
I can be shy and awkward at first meetings, especially with women I'm highly attracted to, but I usually cover it by telling 'fascinating tales'. If we meet and I start droning on about a bunch of things that happened 25 years ago, don't encourage me unless you want me camping out on your front doorstep. And please, tell me to shut up and relax.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Went through the whole 'art school' Kundara/Bukowski/Burroughs thing quite a while ago. Then a classic Cervantes/Graham Greene/Conrad period. Currently- textbooks, Mary Oliver's poems, Zen koans.
When I watch movies, it's usually the Sundance variety, although I'll slum it with a blockbuster now and then.
I saw Herbie Hancock performing Gershwin, and it brought tears to my eyes. Bridge School was quite nice this year. Ditto Hardly Strictly. I like to listen to Vivaldi when I cook.
I recently came up with this thing with grilled peaches, ginger and chile oil over salmon. Shut up.
The six things I could never do without
I'd like to say a loving partner who appreciates being loved. But if it were truly essential, I'd be dead by now.
A healthy, functioning body. Not quite true, either. I'm thankful, but I know people who define the saying "it's not a handicap, it's a challenge". Health and functionality are relative terms.
An active, creative mind. If I ever get rigid in my thinking, just hold the pillow over my mouth.
The ability to regenerate. I've seen forest fires create desolate moonscapes. Life reasserts itself. Seeing that process helped me recognize that we, too have the ability to recover from the firestorms that sometimes sweep through our lives.
My family, most of whom forgive my occasional rude, thoughtless or lazy behavior and love me anyway.
A good cup of coffee in the morning. I think I once went 6 days before caving.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
What makes relationships work. It's been wonderful, often painful, but I wouldn't have changed anything. They've taught me well before crashing and burning, one of the more important lessons being that I should be more careful who I open my heart to. If we get involved, there's a good chance we will be much better suited for each other, and you should thank your predecessors.
On a typical Friday night I am
What I do as often as I can: great food, tasty wine, brilliant live jazz. Or a barbecue on the beach, with firedancers performing around a bonfire. Or heading off on some hairball adventure for the weekend. What I actually do more often: breathe a sigh of relief that the week went fairly well, cook a quick dinner, catch up on reading, talk to a friend on the phone. Dull, dull, dull. Don't you hate it when friends slow down?
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I cried in the theater watching Toy Story 3. Yeah, the cartoon. It was all about saying goodbye. I'm completely open to sharing anything I've done with those close to me, but that's all you get here.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 45–65
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
you usually don't do that, you get a gazillion messages without lifting a finger, but fine. You're bored.
I'll make it easy. All you need to do is say "hi". I'll take it from there.
Or, if you get a message from me, you can decide if my particular variety of whack job suits you. We both know you're too good for me. Go ahead, ignore me. Break my heart.