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26 F New Orleans, LA

My Details

Last Online
Today – 10:58am
5′ 1″ (1.55m)
Body Type
Space camp
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Has dogs and has cats
English, Swedish (Poorly)

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My self-summary
I think too much. I say too little. I say too much. I'm an agoraphobic social retard at heart, but very good at holding up the facade of "functional and charming marginally attractive girl" like some sort of martyr.

I hate taking pictures of myself. In that vein, imagine me also melodramatically weeping as I tell you I'm no longer a redhead.
What I’m doing with my life
wrangling wolves, defusing philosophical debates with logic, interjecting empathetic banter into logical analysis, playing devil's advocate with the facts to back it up, lazy seamstressing, trying to play the violin without it sounding like cat rape, never leaving my house.
I’m really good at
Being a "know-it-all". Causing rifts at family dinners. Being unabashedly curious about what other people are talking about within earshot. Dressing to the nines-- conversely, dressing like a frumpy 12 year old. Over-analyzing to a fault. Making clothes. Alienating or endearing people within 10 minutes, sometimes sooner, all without ever realizing it's happening at all.
The first things people usually notice about me
According to people I know, I come across initially as shy or aloof. Once I have a drink or two, I lay down absurd and untruthful dark assessments of the world around me, seeming self-deprecation as humor, cause unintentional bruises to your ego, and make deliberately uncomfortable statements immediately before taking a purposeful drag of my cigarette as though I've said something introspective or clever.

I'm apparently extraordinarily polite to strangers I meet in person, and considered to be mild-mannered and thoughtful. Oh, those poor saps.

Apparently, I also "dress like a librarian" (read: grandmother). At home it's usually the same two pairs of pajamas on rotation, because I certainly can't be bothered to dress myself, much less do unnecessary laundry.

We can't all be winners.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Aside from unnerving horror stories on the internet and comically large pamphlets about Jesus hating liberals (or jesus-hating liberals), I don't read as often as I'd like.

I eat mostly vegan. I watch movies and listen to music, but making a grocery list of it apparently makes my profile a fucking novel, and is ultimately unimportant in the long run. Assume it's all super cool shit.
The six things I could never do without
I could pretty much do without everything but my dog and time alone. Other things that are nice include my responsibly consumed prescribed pharmaceuticals (for hypersomnia), my sewing machine, a pack of cigarettes, and the moments of panic before I can switch on my bathroom light. You know, because monsters.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
The death of my rosebushes and my array of neglected house plants. I fucking hate Nancy Grace and Ayn Rand. Ancient Chinese secret. I'll start smiling when you don't make it a requisite to your validation. Jesus, how did I not notice smoking a pack and a half of cigarettes in a 6 hour period? Portland, Seattle, and the cold. Quantum entanglement. If I eat enough tofu, will I finally cry watching Disney movies? Foods not to eat (tofu, corn by-products, peanut butter, TVP). Astrobabble trying to rule my moon house or whatever. Do these pants make me look faaaaaaaaaaat? I can feel the vibrations of the fabric of time and space. Like, whooooooa, maaaaaaan, the universe and shit.
On a typical Friday night I am
Watching movies and reading with my dog. Organizing my music into monthly playlists based solely on when I found said album or band. Piling up the empty bottles of wine scattered across my living room into a lush tree. Psychoanalyzing over-privileged young professionals. Never-ending piles of school work. Doing something strange for some change.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
This one time [DATA EXPUNGED].
I’m looking for
  • Everybody
  • Ages 25–36
  • Near me
  • For new friends
You should message me if
Must be patient as I awkwardly flake out on you at the last minute with excuses like, "oh I think I ate something bad, can't make it" or "sorry, I slept through all of my alarms" and instead just sit and feel guilty as i re-watch tv shows with my dog.