*Vacancy*

Recently my cat and I were exiled to London from Scotland, for attempting to take over the world. My cat, Eli, was the brains of the operation. I've overthrown him and taken the role as Brain and I'm now auditioning for someone to take on the role as Pinky!

The Salary:
My old flatmate tells me the most romantic thing a guy can get a girl is a kinder surprise, so this is what you will be paid in, intermittently whenever I remember to get one/the shop has them/when I don't need to break a £10+ note.

The Role:
Will involve general laughs, hanging out, going out and exploring. What ever interests you really I'm up for anything!
Great promotion prospects if things go well.

The Company:
22 year old Scottish guy that can play the pipes (Oh dear god the pain of being a stereotype) Complete awkward weirdo but of the good variety, interested in films, the theatre and world domination. I like to think I'm hilarious.

Requirements:
Female between 18-23
Basic English
Fun and interesting that has decent chat
Proof of Eligibility to work in UK
NI Number

Apply Below

Trying to take over the world, don't worry though I'll be a benevolent dictator... free chocolate on Wednesdays!

J M Barrie, Oscar Wilde, Alexandre Dumas, Robert Louis Stevenson, Arthur Conan Doyle, George Orwell, Thomas Paine, Christopher Hitchens, Richard Dawkins

Badlands, Amélie, A Bronx Tale, Moon, Control, Quadrophenia, The Nightmare Before Christmas, The Shining, Dr. Strangelove, Anything Disney/Spielberg/The Muppets/Fills me with nostalgia.

Chvrches, Passion Pit, M83, Yann Tiersen, City and Colour, Bon Iver, Frightened Rabbit, Florence + The Machine, James Vincent McMorrow, Daughter, Alex Clare, Babyshambles, The Libertines, Pete Doherty, Bob Dylan, The Cure, David Bowie, Joy Division, The Velvet Underground, Lou Reed, Iggy Pop, The Smiths, The Clash, The Kinks, The Jam, The Beatles.

TV Shows - QI, Big Bang Theory, Blackadder, BBC News 24 (because I'm that cool)

My Imagination
The Internet
Tomato soup and a cheese toasty
My Cat
My MacBook
Films

Not that I'm picky or anything but if you're an up and coming theatre actress, french, look like a cross between Mila Kunis, Miranda Kerr and Natalie Portman and have the personality of Amélie you should definitely get in touch. (take that with a pinch of salt)