48 Nashville, TN
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My self-summary
Thought I would update the profile to take account of my experience on OKCupid the past several months. I need to do more to shoo away ladies who would find me tedious, or whom I would find uncurious. I’m looking for a best friend — can it be so hard?

I'm an intellectual with a working-class identity (second-generation college grad — both my parents were born in farm houses). If you and I go to the Belcourt together to see a Slavoj Žižek film I’ll want to decamp to Jackson’s afterwards and talk about it for another two hours over copious amounts of red wine. I couldn’t give a rat’s ass about sports.

I live simply, don’t own a house, don’t own a car, and am something of a “Somerset Maugham-ish cheerful hobo.” YET… I run a venture-backed healthcare startup in Nashville. Those are the two sides of me. They coexist quite nicely as far as I’m concerned, but you might be the kind of gal that’s looking for one or the other.

I’m a binge-worker. I’ll work 16 hour days and then take a day or two off. An evening off usually means cinema on the sofa; occasionally it means dancing at Robert’s. I enjoy eating out — Southern Haute Cuisine or anything else. Lament the lack of Dim sum in Nashville but grateful for Ramen.

My hair is usually a mess, but my clothes fit. My mother and my gay friends try to cajole me into shaving my beard but I’m keeping it.

I have a couple of health issues that probably won’t kill me anytime soon, and you’d never know about them unless I told you, but they could become problems at some point down the road.

I’m polite, try to be courteous always, and have a good relationship with my mother and father.

Sex: A couple times a week is good for me; I’m probably not capable of doing it every day, and in any case it would become commonplace and tedious. I need conversation and companionship more.

Not that I’m not looking for passion, or even love. Just that I’m old enough to understand E. B. White’s observations:

“Even after one has experienced love, one finds difficulty defining it. Likewise, one may define it and then have all kinds of trouble experiencing it, because, once having defined it, one is in too pompous a frame of mind ever again to submit to its sweet illusion. By and large, love is easier to experience before it has been explained — easier and cleaner. The same holds true of passion. Understanding the principles of passion is like knowing how to drive a car; once mastered, all is smoothed out; no more does one experience the feeling of perilous adventure, the misgivings, the diverting little hesitancies, the wrong turns, the false starts, the glorious insecurity. All is smoothed out, and all, so to speak, is lost.”

What would make me feel connected is working together at the kitchen table on our laptops and taking breaks to read something to each other or to have a little nosh. If you’re bookish and literary we’ll have a lot of fun together and I’ll relish your company. If you ride a city bike, even better. I seek someone who values books, bicycles, red wine, and a good pair of leather shoes.
What I’m doing with my life
Inventing things and making things.
I’m really good at
The first things people usually notice about me
I ride up on a bicycle with fat tires wearing a funny hat.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Authors: Philip Roth, Sam Lipsyte, Peter Taylor, Raymond Carver. Directors: Solondz, Tarkovsky, Herzog, Fassbinder. Music: Electronic, symphonic, jazz. Food: Southern Haute cuisine, Sonoran style Mexican, Dim sum, Ramen.
The six things I could never do without
coffee grinder
red wine
I spend a lot of time thinking about
how to solve problems.
On a typical Friday night I am
With friends or by myself at the Belcourt.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I fantasize about having silly adventures in space.
You should message me if
you like to live with a warm little clutter of words and ideas, but not things.