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doctorgrey

25 M Hialeah, FL

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 8:49pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
Hispanic / Latin
Height
6′ 1″ (1.85m)
Body Type
Thin
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Sometimes
Religion
Atheism, and very serious about it
Sign
Taurus, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Working on university
Job
Student
Income
Relationship Status
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Strictly non-monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Pets
Has dogs and has cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), German (Poorly), Spanish (Okay)

Similar Users

My self-summary
everything on my profile is absolutely 100% categorically sincere

my name is definitely a fifty shades of grey reference

shut-in chic post-fore-postplaying myoptimum ironoclast

i'm a very outgoing girl. shy at first.

i am a simple, laid-back, down-to-earth, easy-going platitude who works hard and plays hard

reckless libertine. silver-blooded slytherin

embrace the absurd, laugh instead of crying

i am perverse and often baffling

i only do open relationships, sorry if this bothers you (not really)
What I’m doing with my life
terrorizing my housepets

bunny ranching

moonlighting as veronica mars

between making an ass of myself and inadequately conveying irony over the internet, i fence in my spare time (with swords, not pickets) and pretend to be a functional person
I’m really good at
guessing plot twists, not believing a word you say, seeing fnords, sleeping through alarm clocks, sexting, devil's advocacy, driving manual, divining how fat you are despite your attempt to hide it with angled pictures and making people laugh/uncomfortable
The first things people usually notice about me
that i look like somebody they know

my unfaltering ability to make hilarious blunders while trying to do simple things

how much more like brian i look than dexter
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
i promise i have superb taste

but who cares
The six things I could never do without
in no particular order: glasses, blackout curtains, manual transmission, connectivity, eyebrows, and the unrelenting/hilarious stupidity/ingenuity of humankind
I spend a lot of time thinking about
where to eat for lunch and what i want on my sandwich
On a typical Friday night I am
face-down in a puddle of my own vomit and turning down sex

playing children's card games

wearing the skin of my anime princesses
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
i frequently laugh at your expense, but i just as frequently cry at mine

i laugh harder at my own jokes than i ever will at yours

i don't read your favorite anythings

i frequently always never sometimes occasionally change my profile in trivial ways just to show up in your activity feed

i wish i could put "activity partners" in scare quotes
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 18–49
  • Near me
  • For new friends, short-term dating
You should message me if
•eyebrows

•you are my 100% enemy

•you want to be my blowjob queen

•you're an obnoxious knee-jerk reactionary social justice slacktivist

•all you have to say is "hi" or "what's up" (i appreciate simplicity)

•you lack perspective

•you are a creep, douchebag, psycho, axe murderer or any combination thereof

•you want to be my sugar mama

•you are my doppelgänger; be prepared to have sex

you should not message me if

•you are a self-described intellectual

•you work hard and play hard

•you hunt any kind of animal for sport

•you think you are a sapiosexual

•you are living your life

•you are a hufflepuff. loser.

•you like the big bang theory

•you have kids. no offense, moms, i still think you're sexy (as
long as you're sexy)