Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I want to get a-list for like a day just so I can change my
username to 'big_runner-some odd number' or something. I chose this
one because i didnt want to be "pinned down" to one screen-name. Is
the caption "mean old bastard seeks woman messed up enough to like
that sh-t" taken?
I think I want to date a female sprinter so i can relate to my
friends who still eat "Fast food", (bad jokes like this are part of
Don't be half-assed. That makes it much harder to sit.
I love tri's and du's but I also love a calm night in a bar
listening to a band.
I was in Minneapolis this weekend to compete with the greatest
duathletes in the country! I qualified for the ITU Duathlon World
Championships in Spain for 2016! I'm back in PA and already miss
how nice all the women there were. :)
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm a bit of a gadget nerd. I just got the Garmin 920xt watch so im
addicted to playing with it like a smart-phone.
i just ran 7 miles with it and forgot to turn on the gps!
bad wordsmithing and double-entendre.
i made a groucho marx meme and wrote "become a marxist and double
your entendre" yes.. i am this bad.
telling really corny jokes to beautiful women to get a
Love to cook. I can make my own sushi and do pretty often. still
alive so must not have screwed it up too bad right? I just learned
that I cannot make Pizza. destroyed one this year. so sad.
Looking for a class on self defence against fresh fruit and a place
to register my silly walk.
Sneaky test keywords section: Run, Runner, climb, craft beer,
athlete, independent, secure, confident, autonymous(dont
misinterpret autonymy for desire to be alone), fearless,
Trying to avoid girls with major-self-esteem issues. It might sound
cold but there's a Papa Roach song that nails it. The lyric goes "I
can't help you fix yourself". If you have zero drive, zero ambition
and zero self esteem, I have zero interest.
on my religion, im an atheist but i blend in with my jewish and
christian friends in that i dont talk about it unless asked or
faced with some unignorable travesty brought forth by a religious
I'm somewhat scared of any woman who is 90% similar to me because
I'm an asshole.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
That thing you hate, but it's ok, because it's cute when I do
human physiology, computer engineering, Linux, math, science.. and
COOKING!! I make my sauces from scratch.
Baritone vocal impressions(i do an awesome Thurl Ravenscroft
version of 'you're a mean one mr grinch')
Someone just asked me why I didn't mention the vocal impressions or
cartoon character voices. I am good at them but most girls think
they're corny. My foreign coworker thinks I sound exactly like a
couple of my impressions.
Bad puns... Juneau, I was gonna hit on this girl from Alaska but I
just wasn't Inuit.
My personal ad needs to have one of those roller-coaster signs
modified to read "your self-esteem must be THIS HIGH to ride Bob."
I seem to draw these emotionally damaged girls. Not saying they're
not nice people, just exhausting when they don't
running away from discussions about religion.
fixing ANYTHING. I've always fixed my own cars, do all my own
handyman work on the plaster, paint, flooring, electrical, and
pretty much everything but the plumbing in my house.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
my arms. or dog hair from my border collie rescue
odd as this may seem, I'm a computer guy for a living and never
play video games...at all. Can't do the sitting-around thing,
unless I'm cuddling with someone special.
You're not allowed to sleep with me just to get closer to my
AWESOME red hat.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Homer's Odyssey(sometimes I wonder if my job was designed for
Sisyphus). The God Delusion, Catastrophe by David Keys,
Really old American animation.. but conversely, I don't like
foreign animation or newer than 1970s animation. Chuck Jones was a
genius, so I will occasionally watch a newer cartoon but I dont
appreciate them in the same way.
Bones, Robot Chicken, Monty Python (argument clinic, self defence
against fresh fruit, i mean come on these are brilliant).
Real Genius, Commando, Terminator 2,
Oh, and I'm a Metallica hipster. If you say you "like" Metallica
but like ANYTHING written since 1993, you don't like REAL metal and
i will argue this to the mat at any time. I'm also still pissed
about them ruining Napster.
I also like really really old movies.. like before 1950-old.
Oh and the show "Big Bang theory" wavers between making me laugh
out loud and want to write a letter correcting their math.
I normally hate covers and remakes. It takes a lot to make me give
an ounce of credit to a remake.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
internet, my dog, really tall women (short girls are cool too,
taller women are just one of my favorite flavors), craft beers.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Why aren't there questions like these:
Can you climb 3 flights of stairs without looking like you've been
interrogated at Guantanamo Bay?
Can you run a 5k without walking?
These are important.
If you cannot answer "yes" to each of these, swipe left.
Do you sweat and emanate the smell of barbecued food when walking
more than 50 yards?
Again, this is a deal-breaker.
Why did the staff robot put a girl who smokes in my quiver?? Why
does hypocrisy give me such a migraine?
Why do i feel so cheap after laughing my butt off at the work of
Seth Green and Seth McFarland. hate myself for it but it cracks me
It's ok if you're a theist but anyone who cites God on their
profile, swipe left and don't bother me.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
anymore, browsing okc and in my best lorax voice: uttering the
phrase "that's a woman?"
contemplating how weird it is that i am a star wars parody fan but
not actually a star wars fan
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I text message in perfect grammar and spelling.
oh and I can lip sync every Schwarzenegger line in order from every
terminator movie.. it's one of those useless unamusing
I get goosebumps when reading white papers on the computing grid at
the large hadron collider at Cern. Yes, I'm that sad of a
I do big triathlons but I hate to swim.
See the word 'your' used where 'you're' would have been appropriate
is like kryptonite to me. It makes my brain hurt no matter how much
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're not a psychology graduate looking to offset your own
insanity by spending long evening psychoanalyzing everyone
If you know what an EMIRP number is.
If you're the kind of person who starts their day with a mile swim
and a 5k run.
If you own your own rock climbing shoes or ski boots or cycling
If you know all the words to the Ren and Stimpy Log song.
If you know the proper use of "your", "there", their" and "they're"
You don't actually think the world was populated by one incestuous
family twice, and you dont think that kangaroos with no opposable
thumbs hopped all the way from Mt Ararat to Australia leaving no
evidence of their diet, their droppings, or their feet behind along
And if you're taller than me, that is hot!
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.