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29 New Orleans, LA Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 25–38
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Dec 24
6′ 1″ (1.86m)
Body Type
Strictly halal
Other, but not too serious about it
Capricorn, and it’s fun to think about
Dropped out of space camp
Art / Music / Writing
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Likes dogs
English (Fluently), Spanish (Poorly), Hebrew (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Capitalist pig
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I write and bike. I'm also a cook. Last winter I was the only straight male bar tender at a gay bar. It was a lot of fun until someone got their eye poked out…
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Losing track of time, not smiling in profile pictures, prattling on, fixing things, and making "problems" "go away".
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Either my hair, mustache, smile, or the massive amount of congealed blood on my clothing.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Writers: David Foster Wallace, David Eggers, Max Brooks, David Sedaris, Orwell, Hemmingway, Tim O'Brien, Tom Robbins, H. L. Mencken, HST, Douglas Adams, Buchowski, Vonnegut, Ayn Rand, Karl Marx…

Food: Anything I've killed or grown. Thai, Lebanese/general Middle East, praline bacon, and bread.

TV: I don't have a television and not terribly interested in most of the things on it. I do however like Breaking Bad, Treme, Girls, Newsroom, Mad Men, and a few other shows with a well written storyline.

Film: Wes Anderson is my favorite director and Bill Murray is my favorite actor. I loved "Beasts of the Souther Wild" and Willem Dafoe is so good in "The Life Aquatic" it hurts. I also like Tarentino, Scorsese, F. F. Coppola, Sofia Coppola (when her acting isn't ruining a Godfather film), and Jim Jarmusch.

Music: Everything that is good and most things that aren't good. Except Nickleback, fuck those guys.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Good company, a bicycle, a 4 month supply of urine (believe me this is necessary), a leather belt, my journal, and a working pen.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Taking a small mammal to "pound town"
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Fridays I like to spend alone in my garden shack. I usually put my scrotum into a vice grip pliers and flog myself until I pass out. Unless I'm feeling saucy, but telling you about that will probably creep you out.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm the Anti-Christ. Don't worry though, I'm too distracted by Internet porn to bring about the apocalypse. My dad is so disappointed…

I've also had sex with Danny Devito's love child. She made me talk like Arnold Schwarzenegger and act out scenes from "Junior" and "Twins".
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You feel inclined to be rude.

You want to make $14 the hard way.

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