Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Some of these photos may be misleading, since at least one was
taken BEFORE I acquired more chins than a Chinese phone book. The
most recent is (obviously) the one where I appear the most ancient
and burned-out, and the oldest is where my urchin looks the
Divorced since 2005. (Life is much more peaceful and vastly more
enjoyable now). Although unwaveringly loyal, it appears that I'm
just not very good at marriage, and I think I'll pass on any
further attempts to get it right.
I'm fortunate to have the coolest kid in the world. She is in
college, and is now far enough away so she can safely regard me
with richly deserved scorn and derision; when she's not pretending
I don't actually exist. Nevertheless, I have always enjoyed every
moment of her company, and I continue to do so whenever she's
available and not too embarrassed to be seen in my vicinity. Did I
mention that she's the coolest kid in the world?? Really. I can't
think of anyone I'd rather spend time with.
My perfect match would (of course) be a blind woman with no sense
of smell who is prone to severe lapses in judgment, but beyond that
she should comfortable with herself, confident, and self
sufficient. She MUST have a lively sense of humor, preferably one
that's somewhat incongruous and a shade off-kilter. An appreciation
of light-to-moderate sarcasm could be a great plus, as would an
utter inability to take life seriously and a strong tendency to
laugh at almost everything. Morals and scruples would be a
refreshing change of pace, as well.
I'm not so much looking FOR anything or anyone as I am just
"looking." I'm open to conversation, communication, friendship or
whatever else might develop (as long as it doesn't involve serious
pain, traumatic injury or the frequent wearing of a chicken suit.)
I have no specific expectations, and therefore no agenda and no
rigid circumstances or qualifications that need to be met. I
hesitate to say that my kid comes first, since it should be a given
for anyone who HAS kids, but she does indeed take precedence.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm enjoying it. Breathing is my sole criterion for an excellent
day. Anything beyond that is simply superlative.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
"Really Good" means, like world renowned, to my way of thinking, so
I can't think of a thing I'm really good at.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My sartorial splendor. Having spent a lifetime in one sort of
uniform or another, I now tend to dress like a vagrant, with
comfort being the sole criterion in my wardrobe selections. So, I
generally look like some sort of ragpicker unless an occasion calls
for something better.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
All of Patrick O'Brian's books. Robert Crais, John Sandford, James
Surowieki, Steig Larrson (wish he was still alive.)
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My Darling Daughter
Her Friggin' Cat (How I WISH I could do without her.)
Reading material of some sort.
Anti-psychotic drugs (just kidding).
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Just "thinking" is a supremely agreeable past time. Can be simple
or convoluted, wickedly funny or diabolically evil. That's the
great thing about thinking; at the moment there are no Thought
Police. (Though I'm sure they're not far off.)
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
I try to be in bed by 10:30. If that doesn't happen, I usually just
go home. (Just kidding, of course.)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Who knows? I don't have many secrets.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
As mentioned above, you're prone to severe lapses in judgment and
have a demonstrated poor taste in men.
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.