I value integrity in people; genuine interactions, honesty, a proper amount of hubris, self-awareness, perspective, as well as the right balance of laziness and focus. It's important to me that the people in my life be able to laugh at nearly anything (because all life is absurd), especially themselves. It's also important to me that my friends recognize the import of personal responsibility and exhibit a degree of self-respect which at least meets my own.

Actually, self-respect is a critical foundation for me. Without it, we are enslaved to other people's perceptions of us. It's self-respect that liberates us to enjoy life, breeds honesty, nurtures personal growth and sets us free. Besides, people who constantly require others to validate their sense of self-worth are a tiresome drain on my energy and I have no patience for such head games. I Love others as much as they sincerely Love themselves.

Eh, let's see... I'm also a relatively phrenic person, semi-philosophical, a critical observer, people-watcher, and a rose-toucher. I'm jocular, skeptical, rational, emotive, creative, sensual, verbose, uncertain, brutally honest, and dualistic. I'm in then out, here then gone, lost then destined, wandering then focused, interested then introspective, and passionate through them all.

Really, I am pretty much straight, and as flattered as I am, please stop trying to convert me, gentlemen. I may be open to multi-partner encounters and whatnot, but I've had my time trying mano-a-mano and it's just not my cup of tea. I relish females, in many forms, and I've come to understand that women are my fetish. It's true I fall in Love with brains before bodies, but when it gets down to the physical intimacy, I really do lean strongly toward the female of the species. Sorry, fellas. I really am flattered, though.

I'm not sure what else to say here. Check my site for other ways of seeing me.

Seeking Love and fulfillment, like anyone. I work, play, learn, grow, create, change... I enjoy genuine people and time to myself.

I'm also trying to stay on top of the myriad of strange things I must handle at work (a small training program within the University of Florida). It's odd how my job is often paralleling my personal life in terms of lessons being learned, conversations being had, etc. Meh, it's a paycheck.

I'm trying right now to reestablish my sense of self-identity, independent of my relationships. clumsyintention and I recently ended our romantic/sexual involvement (though we're still friends and roommates), and it's important to me to focus on myself, my idea of who I am separate of others, so I'm not getting into anything too serious right now. I'm still all for the sex, of course, but very picky about who it's with. I've taken a recent Lover, but we're keeping some distance so we can feel like we have plenty of time for ourselves individually.

Also, should you just be looking for some online fun, you can always play amusing games. Seriously, I'm a huge dork sometimes.

So that's what I'm up to. What about you?

Using my brain, observing others, extrapolating the results, sketching with ink, seeing the wider scope of things, recognizing my own mistakes, appreciating beauty (from flowers to Oliver Sacks' writing), questioning assumptions, wearing my heart on my sleeve, and alienating a room full of people.

Oh, and I'm pretty decent at chess.

The same thing they notice about anyone else - facial features and expression. This is one of the most idiotic aspects of these profiles.

Let's pretend this says "The first thing(s) I consider when I meet other people socially," which is much more revealing.

I generally consider whether someone is psychologically and emotionally healthy or not. I watch for the subtle cues, hear between the words, build a small mental pile of notes about others that helps me discern how much they're being true to themselves and how genuine they are. I mean, if you're a needy, insecure person, I'm probably on to you in five minutes. If you've got standards of integrity and personal responsibility, I'm sure it will shine right through.

Now, while this does mean I wouldn't involve myself too deeply with someone I felt was fracked up, that doesn't stop me from interacting with them or engaging them in conversation and enjoying their company. I can be amicable, when I want to.

Also, just because someone may be a crazy motherfreller doesn't mean I think they're necessarily unhealthy. It has a lot to do with honest self-expression and integrity. If you have integrity, but you're loony as a 'toon, you may still tickle my fancy (in fact, you just may be more interesting to me than someone stable). It's okay, you can take your chances.

No, I still refuse to do this. One day I may list a sampling of some things, but at this point I still find this section tedious and banal. The closest you can get is my Pandora profile.

Instead of favorites, let's pretend this part is "Some of my most important values are"...

Love: Yeah, cliché as it is, I must admit that this happens to be the most important thing in my life. To have Love for myself so that I can give it to others (you can't give something you don't have) is probably the most rewarding thing.

Personal Power: This is a very far-reaching concept for me. It includes and connects to many aspects of life for me. Every decision I make is part of it, how I speak to others is part of it, the manner in which I choose to live is part of it... it's almost too big to describe, for me. So, here are a few of the other values which include the concept of personal power.

Honesty: Perhaps the most key element in personal power is honesty. With myself, with friends and Loved-ones, even with coworkers and strangers. Life is simply easier when you don't give away the power to be your true self by lying to those around you. So, in a way, I'm honest because it saves me hassle - sheer laziness.

Responsibility: It's been a very important lesson for me to learn about my personal responsibility to myself. The way I see it, the only respectful way to treat myself and others is to be responsible for myself and only myself - never to take anyone else's responsibility from them. It's important that we retain the power to make our own choices in every way possible. To allow others to be responsible for my choices is giving away that power, and vice verse.

That's just a few representations, but probably the most important. Also on the list are the three great virtues of a programmer: Laziness, Impatience and Hubris.

Beyond the obvious living requirements (which includes sex, you know)....

1. Love
2. Humor
3. A Computer / Web Access [e.g. Wikipedia, Pandora, Google, Ubuntu, and so forth].
4. Ubuntu (the other kind)
5. Music (maybe this is part of the computer thing)
6. Self-Respect

• My experience of reality and who I really am.
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• Whether what I'm choosing is the right thing to do or just an extension of my learned prejudices and socio-cultural expectations.
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• What other people are thinking, often in relation to myself.
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• "Should I have another Guinness?"
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• The richness verses simplicity of my personal philosophy. I truly think each person must derive their own philosophy based upon their own thinking and experiences. Of course, such a philosophical view would be augmented and influenced by reading other people's thoughts and discussions with others, but the key is that one expend mental energy in the contemplation upon, and application of, their philosophical system. I don't believe in "sin", but the closest thing I can imagine would probably be to refuse the use of one's own mind, particularly in the realm of individual evolution.
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• Also, good coffee (no, not Starbuck's - I said good, not scorched and over-caffeinated).
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... pleased to be off work, looking forward to whatever I feel like doing. That can be laundry and a DVD, out and about (say at Tim & Terry's, Coffee Culture or some such), conversing with and enjoying my friends, staying home to write some code alone, watching some porn, or whatever else I may feel like doing just then. There's been little consistency about my Fridays for some time.

I'm envious of the female form and sexual capacity - I have a fantasy to exchange bodies with a woman for a week and be able to experience orgasms with 10,000 more nerves than the male version. Natch.

Also, I'm pretty much a geek. Okay, you likely discerned that from somewhere else in this profile, but seriously...
I play a browser-based MMORPG occasionally; I run Ubuntu only at home (though my Lover has Vista on her lappy - ew); I write XHTML, CSS, JavaScript, etc.; I own a copy of Godel, Escher, Bach; Google is my favorite tool ever; Geek. Note that I do not consider this a negative thing, just a personal leaning.

It's countered with some perspective, though: I'm not too serious about gaming and have no console; I'm not a fanboy, I just got fucking sick of Windows problems; I almost never update my website or webholes like this one; I've never finished G.E.B.; I do occasionally go for walks, ride a bike, go outside... really. I have some balance, a sense of scope, you know?

• ... you are truly confident in yourself
• ... you don't require constant attention or validation to feel like we have a good friendship/relationship
• ... you respect my relationships with others
• ... you value yourself more than anyone else

Missing any? You can try anyway, but you may not enjoy me as much as you think. Also, understand that I am only here occasionally, so you would be more likely to reach me with standard email to brent.elskan (at) gmail.com.