38 Brooklyn, NY
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
My self-summary
I consider myself a graceful 6'4" white boy with size 16 shoes. I usually wear Chuck Taylor's because that's the only brand I can find that has my size. It's a tough life. I moved to NYC from Pennsylvania to attend art school and study "cartooning". Somehow I got a job after I graduated and have worked since as an illustrator/designer/animator jerk. I have a subscription to Mad Magazine and I collect original art from it. I love being in the woods. I've vacationed in Transylvania. I have a dry sense of humour and I like to spell "humour" with an "our" instead of "or" as in "humor". My favourite colour is yellouw. I like doodling and making paper things and thinking about stuff.
What I’m doing with my life
"So-called", or something... (get it?)
Working and working out to get into bikini shape and then freelancing on da side.
I’m really good at
Drawing pretty people ugly, chess, 3 point jump shots, ripping off the perfect length of tape, amateur chiropracting, doing impressions while taking a shower (I hope the neighbors don't hear me), making dirty martinis, navigating city sidewalks (sweet spin moves), busting chops...

I'm really bad at : Spitting. I wish I could spit like a real man, instead I always get that little bungee cord trail and it gets everywhere :(
The first things people usually notice about me
Facial ticks (literally, deer ticks) and saying stupid things that probably only I think is funny.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I love my Kindle and read different stuff all the time. Kurt Vonnegut was always my man... I met him once and almost picked up the cigarette he discarded, but then I decided that was too weird.

A CHRISTMAS STORY is my all-time favourite, I know it inside out. Quiz me! I also love cheesy action and horror movies. Friday the 13th has a special place in my heart (I go camping where they made part 1). I like all sorts. Ping Ping Summer is a new fav!

My So-Called Life (I'm totes a Krakow), It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, Mr. Show, Tim & Eric, Nathan For You, Walking Dead, Adventure Time, Regular Show, Simpsons, Family Guy, Portlandia, Beavis & Butt-head, Aqua Teen... I also listen to The Howard Stern Show everyday.


Food: Long John Silvers. Also, Dominos is awesome and I don't care what you think.
The six things I could never do without
1. AXE Body Spray
2. AXE Black Chill Deodorant Stick
3. AXE Shower Gel
4. AXE Charged Spike-Up Looking Putty
5. AXE Boost Energizing Face Wash
6. AXE iPhone app
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Stoopid junk.
On a typical Friday night I am
Huh huh huh... "There's no such thing as a typical Friday!" - stolen from everyone else's answer.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I just discovered I'm IN "Sharknado 2".
You should message me if
This service is $4.99/min.