Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy

eptify

34 M Gainesville, FL

I’m looking for

  • All who like bi men
  • Ages 26–42
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Oct 13
Orientation
Bisexual
Ethnicity
Height
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Mostly vegetarian
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Religion
Atheism, and laughing about it
Sign
Education
Job
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Pets
Speaks
English (Fluently)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I am not sure what I want right now. Message me if you want to talk, but please try not to take it personally if I just need some me time.

I seek spontaneous debauchery, inappropriate laughter, truth embellished to the point of absurdity, and everything outre. I seek after beauty, and new fields of study to justify my claim of Renaissance geek. I am interested in and excited by most things - I like to know how they function (or fail to); coupled harmonic oscillators, invisible social technology, obsolete but complete classification schema - it is all one to me. I lack that niggling voice advising the path more traveled by: this has led to being locked inside more than one building after hours. I like parallel modes of communication even though I am only fair to middling or less at reading body language even when I remember to try. I am fantabulous, syzygelatinous, and pedantrocious.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Current projects to keep my mind occupied include:
* exploring the social parameter space to produce positive sum equilibrium solutions to iterated prisoner's dilemma style problems in the presence of shared resources and a finite reputation space. Each of us is obviously better off when all of us invest in the common good, but which societal knobs need to be twiddled to ensure that Nash-optimal selfish strategies produce altruistic results?
* a statistical program for objectively assigning (scalar monetary) value to employees based on producing better outcomes than a generic employee in the same set of situations. Institutional memory, charisma, and similar intangibles can add value to your company that does not readily reduce to a line item in a budget, but can nonetheless be measured and incentivized.
* lobbying Tallahassee and Washington to include a feedback clause in all new bills. Randomized trials with societal equipoise are more likely to drag us into The Future than is mere ideology. Why do we keep passing laws without ever bothering to check that they have the intended effects?
* staying outside of my own Schwarzschild radius.
* writing puzzles for my fortnightly Dungeons and Dragons game. Werebeholder? There Beholder!
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
* Balance. I enjoy walking on rails and perching on gargoyles. I pace in figure eights when thinking peripatetically, turning equally this way and that. I read books on the history of mathematics and work the examples.
* Droll wit, puns, and double entendres. I can usually keep a straight face and oh-so reasonable intonation just long enough to put forth some modest proposal.
* Faces (pulling). I use my powers for the greater good by confusing squalling infants. Silly noises and dances also feature in my repertoire.
* I am not, however, proficient in Faces (recognizing). The great actor switcheroo in Plan 9 from Outer Space goes unnoticed every time. When I was TAing I memorized the students' names by group and relied on the 'look vaguely in the right direction' technique to pretend to basic social skills. If you notice that I have visited your profile six times without ever saying anything, this may be the reason; alternatively, I may find you fascinating and you should message me to suggest that I stop tweaking drafts and just press "send" already.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
* My impeccable sense of style. What? No, no, blazer and sandals totally counts as stylish. And if black is not a color, then what do you call #000000?
* My idiosyncratic approach to language. Like most people, I think significantly more quickly than I talk or type. I sometimes lose my place in the conversation, omitting six or seven key steps necessary for actual communication. To counteract this tendency, I pun unrepentantly, choose phrases that bring me enjoyment to speak, and rearrange clauses in logical but nonstandard ways. It has been known to happen that my compensatory word play may at times carry a cost in complexity and concision, but never in ambiguity.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Listed in order of descending relevance.

Books:
* Most anything by: Iain M. Banks, China Miéville, Neal Stephenson, Charles Stross, Roger Zelazny, Michael Swanwick, or their ilk. HPMOR. Science fiction / fantasy, with an emphasis on coherent world-building - it is much easier to hold my interest with fascinating ideas and wooden characters than t'other way 'round. For non-fiction, I generally go for popular science or popular history. I would not find it overly forward should you desire to lend me Guns, Germs, and Steel on a first date.

Food:
* Tasty Indian (gauchely eaten with chopsticks when I get take out), freshly baked bread (kneaded yeast bread, blueberry-banana bread, planetquakes, buttermilk biscuits, whatever else I feel like cooking), feta cheese (parentheses added for consistency). Based on my friends this is out of character, but I do not particularly favor sushi. I am a proud bivegetarian: most of my calories I prepare myself, and when I cook it is usually vegetarian.

Music:
* Whatever Songza feels like playing for me.
* Ani DiFranco, Beborn Beton, Gogol Bordello, Industrial Monk, Miles Davis, Melody Gardot, Norman ROCKwell, Black 13, Seabound, Thou Shalt Not, plus the usual suspects in classical. As long as they put on a good show I am perfectly willing to go dance like a fool to local bands and scream obscure and archaic obscenities. I do, however, reserve the right to wear ear plugs.

Movies:
* Decent speculative fiction (science fiction proper, or just something properly poking into a premise) and/or incessant prettiness (Julia Stiles, 'splosions, Neverwhere, Miyazaki, that sort of thing). Up for romance. Immortel (ad vitam) and NightWatch are good for when I am in the mood for otherReal, or for straight up comedy I like 10 things I hate about you or Arsenic and Old Lace.

Superheroes:
* Norman Borlaug, Stanislav Petrov, Asa Martin
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
* Mind-machine interface for external memory and expansion of my complexity horizon.
* Tactophilic clothing - why should anything serve only one purpose?
* Wikipedia - the free online encyclopedia that allows me to correct grammar and errors in reasoning. One of these days I hope to be more widely read and successful than my pseudonym.
* Coffee - much like the spice, its users can bend space and time, but it does funny things to their eyes.
* The serial comma. Sure, the situations where it will actually impact meaning tend to be somewhat pathologically convoluted and potentially should be reworded for the sake of clarity, but in principle it is better. Undue complexity is often grammar's way of telling you that it is time to add another abstraction layer.
* The ever shifting and blurring line between human-readable and machine-readable. I expect that everyone should be able to read basic TeX and HTML in this day and age, and an image of text is just silly.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Many body physics.
How to justify to myself the purchase of more silk.
Imagining the emperor naked.
Technoprogressive politics.
Hedonic efficiencies.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Workin' hard bein' a job creator. That is currently "job" singular, as I do not have plans to hire anyone any time soon. Alternatively, I quite enjoy board games (silly can be fun, but I prefer something with a little solid game theory behind it) or strolling over to The Atlantic or Bocamino or wherever.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Two thousand three hundred ten is my second favorite integer.
The epidermis is my second favorite erogenous zone.
I have never referred to ejaculation as "the Cambrian explosion".
I can perform the Vulcan salute with the toes of my left foot.
I have a time travel password.
Seasons seven to nine of Firefly fell a bit flat for me, but I am really looking forward to watching season eleven this September through my alternahistoriscope.
I just finished that book you recommend in your profile, and I loved it.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You will support my quest to eradicate boredom on moral grounds.